<h2>I’ve gotten 7 on all of my essays (DBQ/FRQ) but I feel like my teacher is grading too easy since I’ve only gotten 7s and nothing lower/higher and the example I’m going to post is a 4 paragraph essay not 5. Could I get some opinions? I don’t want to go into the AP test thinking I can write consistent 7s and end up with a 2 on the exam or something. </h2>
Analyze the contributions of two of the following in helping establish a stable government after the adoption of the Constitution.</p>
John Adams
Thomas Jefferson
George Washington</p>
(Picked Jefferson and Washington, written in 35 minutes. Re-reading my essay I just noticed I wrote ‘Jackson’ instead of ‘Jefferson’ at one point heh)</p>
America’s democratic government started with shaky self-reliance after the Revolution, followed by stabilization with the policies and contributions of President George Washington’s talent for selecting cabinet members and decision-making, leading to his second term in office. Thomas Jefferson’s vision for America was widely different from his predecessors, as an agricultural republic with more rights and economic liberty for all. Washington and Jefferson helped shape a stable government for the new nation by contributing equality, goal accomplishing, and stabilizing relations between the government and its people. Events such as the Louisiana Purchase in their presidencies shaped America’s future as an industrial country with a spirit of freedom and opportunity for all citizens.</p>
Thomas Jefferson’s presidency started with the Revolution of 1800, the first time political parties sent candidates and campaigned. He managed to stabilize and empower the people of the United States during his two terms as president. One of his major accomplishments was cleared the Revolutionary debt the US incurred. He did this by putting his frugal/simple economic plan into effect, reducing the navy to several ships and the army down to small militias. This was one of his 3 main goals at the start of his presidency that he accomplished. He also spent $15 million in acquiring the Louisiana Territory from a war-weary Napoleon Bonaparte. This doubled the size of the US Overnight and he went to work by sending expeditions westward and incorporating the people. This was important because previously, people had simply pushed past the boundary illegally or squatted, thus stabilizing the nation. Jefferson also nixed Adam’s and Washington’s monarchial lives by not using a horse-drawn carriage or being called “Majesty” and gave more power to the states. As a strict-constructionist, he believed all powers not given to the federal government belonged to the states. This was important because there was now a more equal distribution of power, stabilizing relations between the government and citizens. Jefferson’s accomplishments were successors to groundwork laid by Washington.</p>
Washington, the US’s first president, laid the foundation for America’s freedom and government. One of the ways he did this was by sending soldiers after the Mingo Creek protestors involved in the Whiskey Rebellion. Although he didn’t use force, the protestors broke up and he calmed the animosity. This helped stabilize the relations between people and the tax collectors who had resigned out of fear by calming the crowds and repealing the tax. One of his goals was the increase equality and not be like a British monarch, a concept Americans resented at this point in time. He did so by forming the first cabinet of secretaries in American history. He appointed powerful and intelligent men such as Henry Knox as war secretary, Alexander Hamilton as secretary of the treasury, and John Adams as his Vice President. This increased equality because he got advice from many perspectives, creating a sphere of representation and stable government. Washington’s actions were carefully chosen and planned to create a stable government for America’s future. Jefferson’s actions, decades later, also put America on a path to stable democracy.</p>
<h2>Stability, accomplishment, and equality defined the contributions of the Jefferson and Washington presidencies. These three qualities then defined a stable government for the new America. The United States could go on to form a democratic identity and become a powerful nation, with deep roots in stable relations with its government, goal-oriented presidents, and economic equality.</h2>
Yes I realize the Washington paragraph is missing another fact to analyze. I’m awful with time management. Thanks for any feedback!</p>