Read in an old thread that there’s a point when kids aren’t supposed to email coaches - were they referring to college coaches and it was misplaced on the prep school board? I have asked my kid to be in charge of emailing coaches her schedule and updates about when she is coming to their games to check out the team. Should I be doing that instead? I was wondering last night if coaches felt odd having so many very young people emailing them.
It’s definitely not wrong for your daughter to contact coaches and definitely should come from her, not you. There could have been a misplaced post about D1 college recruiting, but even then I think the restrictions are on coaches contacting athletes. Good luck to your daughter!
For the examples that you stated, I believe that coaches would find it preferable to have the kids, not the parents, emailing them. After all, you are not the one playing soccer/lax, etc.
There may well be questions that are more appropriate for you to ask. Schedules/updates are not amongst them.
Ok, thank you. It made sense to me to have her do this on her own since I am not going to manage her relationship with her coaches but when I read that I got a bit worried!
Students directly contacting boarding school coaches is fine. High school students can also contact college coaches, but don’t expect a reply. In division 1 college sports, college coaches are not allowed contact with students until July 1 of their senior year. But this doesn’t apply to boarding schools.
The TSAO (Ten Schools Admissions Organization) schools have a policy about prospective student-athlete recruitment. I can’t remember exactly what it says, but something along the lines that coaches are not allowed to directly approach students. Instead the coaches are supposed to wait for students to initiate the contact. Its been a while since I looked at the policy, but I’m sure it’s available online.
FWIW…we believed it was more appropriate for our kiddo (not us parents) to contact the coaches at the boarding schools. This was very helpful on many levels. Kiddo was able to speak with coaches in advance of the school visit. Very important to make these plans in advance if your family is planning an on-campus interview or visit. The coach invited us to watch practice. Kiddo had highlight videos ready on the iphone for in-person visits - the coaches could see level of play and this may have helped (especially as one sport is not based on times or place-finishes). One coach was super nice and had a Skype interview with kiddo - even reviewing highlight video and gave pointers. Kiddo told us how connecting with the coaches actually made the interview-application process more personalized and “real”… “can I see myself actually playing XYZ sport here?”…really nice of the coaches to take the time out of their busy teaching or AO schedules!
Early on during the application process Kiddo sent a highlight video and email to a coach at a BS in NY state. Kiddo had been asked to join the high school Varsity team in XYZ sport. The NY coach immediately phoned us to tell us about an issue with a “transfer rule”…that if kiddo played XYZ varsity in 8th grade, then kiddo would have to sit out next year at BS in NY! Not sure if this is also in California. The point is this - if we had not connected with the coach early on, we would not have known about this situation. It all turned out OK and it was a fabulous part of the application process for Kiddo to connect with coaches. :)>-
My kid is on a similar pathway like your kid. I would suggest to do some stealth watching of games, especially
if you are applying to rival schools. Watch and see where your dd fits on the team. Look at the roster, graduating
seniors, etc. We scouted every school where she applied. Your dd can have an intelligent conversation with
the coach and show that she is serious and doing her homework. Tell hubby to calm down, be the chauffeur, and
don’t talk too much with the coach. No fist fights with opposing team’s dads. 
Why all this work? This is just the undercard for the main event of college recruitment, which will start in
freshmen year. Crazy, I know. But, if your dd is at that level, then game on. Good luck.
@sgopal2 yes I kept reading and realized it was the TSAO schools that were being discussed. We aren’t applying to any so doesn’t matter for us.