<p>When you are talking about young people sometimes you have to put them in the community in order for them to see the needs of others firsthand. I still don’t understand how private school kids are any more sheltered than anyone else. What do you think they are sheltered from? My kids go/went to a non religious prep school. There are scholarship students, financial aid students, sponsored students, children of faculty/staff, and full pay students. What exactly do you think they are being sheltered from?</p>
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<p>Ditto. I’d like to hear, too.</p>
<p>PP, it sounds as if you are saying there is no difference in a private and a public school experience - surely that is not what you are saying. Believe me, I would not sacrifice my children on the alter of public schools if I didn’t think they were getting a great education when they were in k-12. I would have moved them to private school. It seems as though your private school is quite diverse. In our area, there are a lot of private schools, but only a few that I think are really good or great academically. None are as diverse as you describe. Those that are non-religious prep schools have some scholarship students, but most are full pay and quite wealthy. What do I think students are being sheltered from? In the non-religious, pricey prep schools, probably nothing; I think a lot of the parents there just don’t consider public school. To be blunt, at least in our area, many parents who send their kids to church run schools want to shelter their kids from types of religious thought that are different than their own. From what I’ve heard from other parents, this doesn’t seem to be the case with Catholic schools. I live in the south, so a lot of little private school pop up in areas because some parents want to shelter their kids from minorities. Again, this is just my experience, and I would not extrapolate that to all communities.</p>
<p>We sent out kids to prep school for academic education, not for diversity or sheltering them from anything. But one of the byproducts of going to one of those expensive schools is the connections they have made, some of those connections probably are more meaningful than from college.</p>
<p>to answer your question literally - </p>
<p>Private school students in our area who attend the prep schools known for getting students into top colleges, are very carefully sheltered from any student who presents as “neurodiverse” at time of application, including some gifted students diagnosed with ADHD, AS, or specific LD, who score in the upper reaches of achievement testing and will eventually do well in honors/AP classes and all manner of standardized tests with little or even no support or accommodation. (There are some who acquire a diagnosis later on, and the situation in those cases is a bit more complicated.) </p>
<p>They are also sheltered from the quirky types who would rather spend their free time reading for pleasure or cultivating hobbies instead of participating in organized sports that are required of all students. They are sheltered from watching students acquire very basic English as new residents of our country, and sometimes move into the highest levels of achievement even in writing within just a couple of years, and then outperform native speakers on standardized tests. (Private schools do not take these students until after they have learned English.) </p>
<p>Public schools are not always crazy about having their share of quirky students on iep’s, either, but they are legally required to find a place for them and provide an “appropriate education”, and in our district with its well-informed parents, they will eventually cave in and follow the law as it now stands. And, of course, they are also required to enroll students on iep’s whose achievements place them in regular or remedial classes.</p>
<p>Private school students and faculty are sheltered from brilliant students who might present a behavioral challenge or not “fit in”, students whose potential is not evident at a young age, and students who work very hard and do not achieve at the highest levels, but inspire others through their hard work and can nonetheless participate in many activities with peers and become part of the community. They are not sheltered (as noted above) from students who acquire a diagnosis later on, or who do not achieve at the levels predicted by the IQ tests they took at time of admission - but if the discrepency becomes too great, these students can be dismissed and sent to public schools, or their parents will withdraw them.</p>
<p>Given the large numbers of elite school grads who are choosing to do TFA, or to train to work as therapists or MD’s, this lack of exposure to these types of peers can turn out to be a professional disadvantage. And, a smaller number of private school grads will find themselves as parents to a child who is “different” or disabled, and lack of exposure to these types of peers while growing up will make their learning curves as parents even steeper than those who can draw upon their memories of peers and classmates.</p>
<p>But, fwiw, we ourselves chose to spend the money we needed to spend to live in a district where public school grads have access to top schools, so have not needed to worry too much about these issues. We chose not to live in a district that did not provide opportunities for high-performing students to take advanced classes, participate in regional and even national competitions, and attend classes with peers bound for a variety of colleges including HYP. It does seem true, however, that high-performing grads from our school are generally not hysterical that the sky is going to fall if they do not end up at a top 10 or top 20 school.</p>
<p>For those of you interested and not believers of the high cost of private school in Los Angeles, below are the TUITION links to some of the TOP Private Prep Schools in the West Los Angeles- all of which cost over $30K/year + books, bus, etc:</p>
<p>Harvard-Westlake School [Affording</a> HW](<a href=“http://www.hw.com/admission/AffordingHW.aspx]Affording”>http://www.hw.com/admission/AffordingHW.aspx)
Campbell Hall School [Campbell</a> Hall: Admissions Tuition & Fees](<a href=“http://www.campbellhall.org/admissions/tuitionfees.aspx]Campbell”>http://www.campbellhall.org/admissions/tuitionfees.aspx)
Brentwood School [Brentwood</a> School: Admissions » Affording BWS](<a href=“http://www.bwscampus.com/admissions/affording-bws/index.aspx]Brentwood”>http://www.bwscampus.com/admissions/affording-bws/index.aspx)
Buckley School [The</a> Buckley School: Admission » Tuition & Fees](<a href=“http://www.buckley.org/admission/tuition-fees/index.aspx]The”>The Buckley School | A Private K-12 School in Los Angeles)
Windward School [Windward</a> School ~ Affording a Windward Education & Tuition](<a href=“http://www.windwardschool.org/tuition]Windward”>http://www.windwardschool.org/tuition)</p>
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<p>There are areas and school systems where going to private schools doesn’t provide any shelter. That’s not true of all areas. </p>
<p>D1 attended a public magnet school housed at a suburban comprehensive public high school that receives Title 1 funding. Students at both the magnet and the comprehensive ran the socioeconomic gamut. The school also had occasional lockdowns because of gang activity on or near campus (I remember one stabbing and one attack with a baseball bat) and groups of pregnant girls of all high school ages discussing what they were going to name their babies. </p>
<p>D1 would regularly get approached by students dealing drugs, but you’ve got 'em at the local private schools as well so that doesn’t count. </p>
<p>Some of D1’s college friends attended public schools in well-off New England community schools. Totally different experience than D1–their school districts were far smaller and less socioeconomically diverse. They’d jokingly refer to D1’s “ghetto” high school, which was hilarious because D1’s high school wasn’t anywhere near that bad. Friends of mine teaching at some more urban elementary schools in the area have their kids do drills to duck under desks in the event that someone comes onto campus and starts shooting. Because it’s happened. No joke. :(</p>
<p>“Private school students and faculty are sheltered from brilliant students who might present a behavioral challenge or not “fit in”, students whose potential is not evident at a young age, and students who work very hard and do not achieve at the highest levels, but inspire others through their hard work and can nonetheless participate in many activities with peers and become part of the community.”</p>
<p>There are plenty of students in privates who would be considered to not “fit in” to the average groups of students. Parents often place their children in private schools who are quirky or different so they don’t get wailed on or made fun of. At a decent private school, if it can be proven that a student does that to others, they can be kicked out in a minute. Not so at a public. That is a far different story than behavioral challenges.</p>
<p>Now private schools can screen out behavioral challenges, but they don’t always. When my youngest first started in private school in the first grade, three of the eight students in his gifted school class had behavior challenges. They were disruptive, and demanded the complete attention of the teacher. She had no idea what my child and the either non-challenged kids were doing, because she had to spend all of her time controlling the others. Can’t imagine how that would work in a classroom of 40. That is not a positive in any way. They were high achievers, but definitely not inspirational.</p>
<p>busdriver11, I know what private schools are, both my husband I went to them. (They were even fairly diverse for the time.) One of my dirt poor college boy friends went to Exeter on scholarship. Many of my nieces and nephews did as well. We seriously gave it some thought for our oldest at various points in his academic life - I also seriously considered homeschooling. I was very surprised when my son thanked me for sending him to public school. He’s comparing his experience and attitudes with those of his friends in college. Doing community service isn’t really the same as having a good friend whose parents barely make ends meet, or who is a foster kid with his grandparents because his parents aren’t able to take care of him. The behavior challenge in my nephew’s private first grade class was asked to leave the school.</p>
<p>I’m not anti-private schools - I was just surprised when we actually started to look into the schools around here that the public schools looked better and better.</p>
<p>My son was a behavioral problem and had some “quirkiness” and got to leave a couple of private schools along the way. I don’t think he was considered “inspirational”. It all sorted itself out.</p>
<p>OP, are you sending your children to this school for an excellent education OR are you sending them to the expensive school in hopes their acceptance chances at HYPS will be increased? </p>
<p>I agree with Momofwildchild from a couple pages back. There is NO guarantee that your kids will get accepted to these tippy top schools because they are attending this private school. Likewise, they might get accepted if they attend a great public high school.</p>
<p>busdriver - ymmv depending upon where you live. The initial response for many parents in our community, once their gifted child is diagnosed with ADHD or an ASD, or a student initially diagnosed with an ASD and developmental delay turns out to also be gifted,or they realize their child is bright but quirky, or their bored child develops behavioral problems in public school or is bullied or excluded from the social circuit by classmates, is to look for a private school that provides small classrooms and individualized programming. They do so with the expectation that the schools will be more nurturing, and their students more likely to be challenged and less likely to be bullied, as you mentioned. </p>
<p>Therapists in our area however routinely warn parents that private schools where quirky students who might nowadays even be given an ASD diagnosis used to thrive, especially the Friends schools, now tend to reject students if there is a history of an ASD or ADHD diagnosis. I have had these trends confirmed by more than one well-known therapist who has been practicing in our area for upwards of thirty years, as well as anecdotally by other parents. </p>
<p>In the meantime, over the past fifteen to twenty years, public schools in affluent communities (where class sizes would be closer to twenty than forty, with paraprofessional assistance availble) have needed to adapt to a whole new type of student. Some do a better job than others, and many of these seem to be schools that also do a good job of providing high-level classes and getting students into good colleges.</p>
<p>I also realize that the decision of whether to go public or private is often not a simple one, but getting back to OP, I would not remove a thriving student from a private placement while in high school except for compelling and immediate financial reasons, for reasons mentioned by other posters on this thread, even if the local public school were to offer comparable or nearly comparable academic opportunities.</p>
<p>^^Yes, frazzled, seems like the most you can do is figure out what your options are and what would be best for the kid, without generalizing that one school should be this way and another should be different way…but focus on what are the facts.</p>
<p>On page 2 I wrote a bit about D’s private school. D is a gifted athlete who may have the skill set to play at the next level in college. When she told all of her friends last year where she was heading to high school, their parents asked us " Is D headed to XXX to play her sport?", as the school is known to field very competitive teams for its size.</p>
<p>We answered every question the same way “D is headed to XXX strictly for their academic rigor, sports are secondary and icing on the cake.” </p>
<p>Our public school district, where D attened in K-8 is economically, ethnically & socially diverse. D’s friends run the gamut of these groups.</p>
<p>Her high school is very ethnically diverse, which was a decising factor for her mother, as D is Amer-Asian. In her 2015 class, there are 3 other Amer-Asian students, with the school being more than 60% white and the balance a mix of ethnicities. The school is not nearly as economically diverse as our public school system, though up to 50% of the students receive some financial aid.</p>
<p>We found it to meet our expectations academically and the experience so far for D is a good one. She would have done just fine at the public high school and there were some big advantages (outside of $$) to her attending it, but this seems to be working out for the best, so far.</p>
<p>We never planned to send our kids to private schools, but did after ninth and eight grade for each of them. </p>
<p>For both kids, I think that the advantages of the private schools were letters of recommendation and more writing. I do not think the school made any difference for my daughter as far as admissions, but she was better prepared in math and writing than her public school classmates. I am hoping that my son got a solid foundation academically as well, but we will see this fall.</p>
<p>I agree with busdriver … just look at the alternatives and make the best decision for each kid.</p>
<p>CT has some wonderful public high schools. That doesn’t mean the HS the next town over is similar. My niece works in a local HS where a 2nd-level public is the highest-rated university a Valedictorian has EVER attended.</p>
<p>We opted to send both kids to private schools from 9th grade. The primary reason we did so was because S was losing all his friends to private school, every year after 5th grade. It was painful to him to always see friends he had worked hard to make go away to another school where he would rarely see or have any contact with them. He thrived in the private HS he selected & was able to take many AP courses that prepared him very well for the private U of his choice. One of his friends went to the public HS that S would have attended & found it very tough to find peers. He ended up taking as many courses as he could at community college & university while in HS & biding his time to leave.</p>
<p>D also made longer-lasting friends in private HS than she had at any point since pre-school. Those kids are still her friends now, whereas the friends she made in all her years in public school have never stayed in touch and were very fleeting at the best of times. These friendships have been invaluable to D as she weathered serious chronic health conditions throughout HS & college.</p>
<p>It was costly for us to afford private tuition, but we feel it helped S get a significant merit award which was substantially greater than his 4 years of private HS tuition, as well as making several good friends in his private HS whom he does keep in touch with now 10 years later.</p>
<p>FWIW, D would probably have been kicked out of her public school due to excessive absences. Her private HS was willing to work with her/us to help her keep up. She did leave HS after her JR year, took the GED & entered CC in what would have been her SR year. She was well-prepared for college & was able to transfer to her dream private U out of CC.</p>