Perhaps it matters whether the kid favors doing expensive activities or hangs out with friends who favor doing expensive activities. Also, colleges with a large percentage of students from high-money backgrounds may see more student spending than those with fewer students from high-money backgrounds (assuming that the colleges are in environments with similar spending opportunities).
Also, would many parents want to contribute to pre-game binge drinking that enables excessive drunkenness that can help enable various bad outcomes?
I treat my S like an adult. He has my credit card and I expect him to know how to manage his finances. So far, he’s only spent money on weekend dinners (which aren’t covered by his meal plan), necessary toiletries, and occasional tickets for group outings. I also expect him to work on campus after his first term even though he attends one of the most demanding colleges with a heavy course load.
@ucbalumnus ,of course no parent wants to contribute to dangerous drinking habits, but unless you monitor every purchase your kid makes, how would you know where your monthly allowance to them goes? I didn’t want to monitor my D’s discretionary money with a fine tooth comb. They are adults and deserve to be treated as so.
Agree that it is not appropriate to micromanage, but I was responding to a previous poster who implied that pre-game alcohol was an expected normal activity that parents should include when considering the student’s spending money.
@ucbalumnus - Again, do you have kids? Read my posts. I did not advocate for parents to give their kids allowance, but just wondering if their kids really do spend less than $100/mon. Most college students do spend money on alcohol, whether their parents believe it or not. I have known some students (my kids’ friends) who use their food money on partying because they didn’t have much of spending money.
BTW - just because students spend money on alcohol doesn’t mean they drink to excessive drunkenness.
Kids really do spend less than $100/month, but of course, it depends on the campus. At some colleges these occasional pizza dinners are provided by the college- if you are on the staff of the newspaper and are working past press deadline, dinner “appears” courtesy of the activities fund. If your rehearsal for a performance runs late, snacks and meals are covered. If you are on the planning committee for a big event for Reading Partners or public school tutors or college advising for kids at local HS’s which do not have college advising- the meetings take place over brunch and the organization provides the meal. Debate prep-- meals.
So a kid on a meal plan who is active in a few campus organizations- what opportunity is there to spend money? If the pizza/bagel munchies are taken care of (many organizations feed their volunteers), and the kid is otherwise busy with classwork and activities, and the dorm hangout is watching someone’s parents Netflix… it doesn’t take much cash to manage. Laundry. Contact lens solution?
I know kids on city campuses who are ingenious with their free time. Usher at the local symphony or theater? free tickets. Volunteer with the red cross for blood drives? One Sunday a month could mean three meals. Add in a ten hour a week job at the campus library and the kid is set.
We didn’t give our kids allowances at college. They had their summer earnings, whatever they earned on campus, and had a credit card for emergencies and pre-agreed to purchases (something nice for Grandma’s birthday, although they mostly bought “My grandson goes to X and I just got this lousy T-shirt” type gifts which they paid for themselves). Transportation back and forth. And we told all of them- you have a choice of getting into a car with someone who has been drinking, or calling a cab at Mom’s expense, you call the cab. But that had been the rule in HS as well so they knew we would never object to paying for that, not that we did more than once a year per kid.
If you buy your kid a coffee pot and either pods or a can of ground coffee (or a large package of Via) you will save $20 a week, guaranteed. Ditto for the water bottle and a small bottle of bleach for the occasional cleaning. I cannot believe how much some college kids spend on being hydrated and caffeinated.
Yes, I also had a friend who went through Columbia with very little money by going to any even where they had free food. Yes, you could also make sure you work on campus events that provide free food. I did all of that myself, but it didn’t mean it was the most productive use of my time.
Evey family’s finance is different and paying for college is a big deal for most families…in my opinion, as much as you could afford it, it is nice and can make quality of life in college better if your student could have a bit of extra spending money. I have been on the receiving end of not able to do as much when I was in college. I never complained to my parents and didn’t take money from them. I don’t think I would have been spoiled if my parents were to give me an extra 20 a month back then (20 beers at the school pub).
My D’17 is living at community college, no meal plan. Not counting the rent or groceries, to make it more like the average college student, she spent just over $150 in November. I think it would mostly be on eating out, a movie, Starbucks, and miscellaneous at Target.
She works at Target, sometimes 30 hours a week, to cover all that, her rent, and groceries so she doesn’t have to touch her savings. We pay for gas, insurance, tuition. She works really hard and I think she will be well prepared for adult life!
I’d highly suggest asking the question specifically of other parents at the same university. (Most have a parents FB page.) There are so many factors at play (location, meal plan, etc.) that a generic question can’t be answered.
The other thing I would add as we are in the holiday season: gift cards tend to be really appreciated by students. Starbucks, Five Guys, really anything food related…and Uber for kids in urban locations.
We gave our kids $0 for discretionary spending. We expected them to work for beer money, coffee, dates, fraternity dues, gas, car maintenance, and stuff like that. We have boys and they didn’t really care that much about clothes. When they came home we would get them clothes/shoes. I really don’t know what they spend because it is their money. When they go back to school on breaks sometimes we give them a few bucks but for the most part they have their own money and they haven’t asked for additional funds.
We have 2 who have graduated and one still in school. They were all in urban or suburban locations.
When the older ones went off the meal plan we gave them $200 per month for food. They said it was enough for them to eat out occasionally. They both like to cook so cooking their own food was not a dreaded chore.
I never gave my kids a limit, but they were pretty frugal. I told them I would charge them if there was anything I didn’t want to pay for on their credit card bills, but I never had to invoke that option. When my son went off the meal plan, his credit card bill meals were much cheaper than meal plan.
ETA - It probably helps that my sons don’t drink coffee or alcohol.
D18 earned about $2,000 this summer for spending money. She has a full meal plan and there are many activities on campus to keep her entertained. So far, she has spent less than $200, but she is very frugal.
There is no average amount - it varies with the student, the family financials, the school they attend, it’s setting (urban and lots to do or rural and less choices), the things they are involved with, the socials group they are part of, and the on and off campus activities they do. All mine have/had access to Amazon account for whatever the want/need and I just replenish the debit card as needed for other purchases. I don’t/didn’t monitor spending, they have always been reasonable, I knew this before they went to college, so we didn’t have to set a budget. They also have their own credit card at college that they take care of so they can get some of their own things without me seeing every transaction. USC opened a Target right on campus at University Village - I have certainly seen an uptick in charges there. But if I had one directly outside my house, I might be there too much too.
Both of my kids had my credit cards while they were in school, but they couldn’t use the cards without my prior knowledge. I gave them a set amount every month and it was deposited in their account the first of the month (similar to a paycheck). I wanted them to manage a budget and lived within their means. I also wanted them to have a certain privacy on how they were spending their money (I considered it as their money once it was given to them). To me, it was TMI to see it on my credit card every time they wanted to buy something. If they were good about budgeting, I also wanted them to be able to keep it (as a reward).
The credit cards mine have are ones they applied for (typically a Wells Fargo college card kind of thing) and pay for with their own money. Good for them to feel that pain of paying it off every month (we have a strict “no monthly finance charges” mantra at our house). It is also good for them to start building some credit. And agree with the TMI, they need to have their own space in some money matters.
I’d just point out that the OP (who has not returned) made this statement:
This seems to have morphed into a thread about parental support / spending / gifting. None of which helps the OP, whose question was focused on how to help the son plan, not on how much the parents might or should throw in.
We gave our son no spending money. Anything he might want to purchase while away at college was his responsibility. At Thanksgiving the subject came up and to date (since we dropped him off in August), he has spent $200.
He lives in a dorm and is on the meal plan. Freshman can’t have cars which he hates but I pointed out to him all the money he has saved not buying gas.
So if the OP is requiring the son to earn his own spending money…I would suggest the OP look at what the actual money the student HAS to help him determine the max he can spend…per month.
It’s a challenge to come up with an exact spending number because different kids spend different amounts.
Agree with suggestion that parents Facebook page is best place to ask. Some colleges include an unlimited local transportation card for students, but others have to pay for this. College students in some in urban locations can use their dining dollars at a wide variety of local food suppliers including the local restaurants/takeouts, Trader Joe’s, etc where others are much more campus-bound and will not cover things like pizza out or groceries bought to cook own food. These are just two examples we’ve come across during college visits demonstrating that what is “out of pocket” for one student may not be for another.
Also: Some students will be spending time on internships that are important for their resumes, but these are often unpaid and take time away from possible paid jobs or studying. I’d rather my D did the internships important for her future and give her coffee money, than expect her to work for the latter by being a barista or cashier, if it’s down to choosing which to spend her time on - and she will be in an internship-heavy field (and yes, they usually do internships during term time, not only summer).