Can someone give me feedback on my UC essay?

<p>I you can, please post here and I can send it to you through a private message. These are VERY rought draft-ish; am I on the right path or should I write differently?</p>

<p>i'll read it</p>

<p>PM me</p>

<p>pm me i'll take a look</p>

<p>sure just pm me =]</p>

<p>i can help out too. pm me.</p>

<p>glad to help</p>

<p>I will be glad to check it out for you! pm me</p>

<p>call on me if you need any help</p>

<p>I am correcting them right now and will pm them to you tonight or tomorrow morning, with it. Thanks for offering to help.</p>

<p>i will be glad to give you feedback, just pm me~~</p>