Certain Essay Topic

I’m currently a Junior in high school who is thinking about what to write my essay on.

I have a few different ideas but one I keep going back to is something very important to me.

At the end of middle school I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety. It affected my entire life. I stopped playing sports, hanging out with kids and doing anything school related. This continued all the way up until about half way through my sophomore year. I bounced back immediately after and started playing sports again and talking to kids and doing well at school.

I wanted to know whether colleges would look down about me talking about overcoming my depression and anxiety since it meant I was “at-risk”

By the way, here were my grades and some colleges I’m thinking of:
Freshman year: 88 total average
Sophomore year: 90 total average
Junior Year: 96 average so far
School doesn’t release class rank

  1. UCLA
  2. USC
  3. BC
  4. UCSD
  5. Notre Dame
  6. Georgetown
  7. LMU
  8. American
  9. UCSB
  10. NYU
    Etc.

Many still think anxiety and depression are “controversial” topics to hide from admissions officers, yet contrary to their concerns, many students write about mental illnesses in their college essays and are admitted. It comes down to the individual - the severity and experience, coping process (therapy, support, self-help strategies), and of course, writing ability. If you’re interested, I can connect you to students currently studying at your target schools who I think could offer you more guidance on this topic. PM me if you’d like.

Do not write about this. Colleges are reluctant to admit students who may have mental health issues that could come back in college. Save it for a blog or journal or conversation with a therapist. Write about something that makes them want to have you on campus, instead of a topic that gives them a reason to say no. Keep your eye on the prize, which is college admission.

When ad coms meet to discuss the applicant pool, you don’t want them to refer to you as “the kid who was depressed in middle school.” There are likely many other aspects of your personality that would be better choices to display. Don’t take the prompts too seriously. Find a more positive story you want to tell, and find a way to fit it to the prompts.

I agree. You are so much more than this one problem. But it’s a red flag for adcoms.

Here’s what has worked for my 2 older kids;
Take a look at the Common App prompts. Write each one as the heading of a new page of a document. Set a timer for 4 minutes. Then brainstorm any event in your life that could possibly apply, no matter how far fetched.

Day 2: Go back and flesh out what you’ve written. Give a couple of bullet points for each, and eliminate the obviously unworkable ideas.

Day 3: Flesh them out some more. Detail what your essay would include, with bulleted paragraphs. Eliminate the unworkable.

Day 4: Actually write the body of a few essays, eliminating those that aren’t working.

Keep going until you have an essay that shows you in the best possible light. In the words of one of the adcoms we spoke to: “GIve them a reason to say yes.”

For what it’s worth, my son’s essay was on a conversation he had with someone at the top of his field, and how that inspired my son to be the kind of man who would offer to mentor a 17 year old kid. My daughter (who also shares your anxiety issues) wrote a great essay about how she’s a combination of little bits and pieces of all of us.

This is my first post to CC after lurking here for months, and I guess I’m going to jump right into the fire.

As a mom of an extremely high-achieving high-stats D19 who has struggled with anxiety and depression for years and was hospitalized last year, these responses make me sad and angry. Mental health issues should not be stigmatized and they are not something to be ashamed or embarrassed about.

Let’s say the OP’s story was different: at the end of middle school, he was diagnosed with cancer. After two long years of chemo, radiation, and surgery, he is finally in remission. His fight against cancer left him with coping skills and an inner strength and confidence that he will carry with him into college and beyond, and he wants to write his application essay about the battle he fought and the lessons he learned. Would you advise him to avoid this topic because colleges might look at him as “defective merchandise” and not want to admit him because the cancer might come back?

If your answer to that is no, you should really rethink your attitudes about mental illness and treatment.

Recently I read that anywhere from 10-15% of high schoolers are exhibiting symptoms of depression at any given time and upwards of 20% will experience them before they are out of their teen years. One in EIGHT teens suffers from an anxiety disorder. These issues are way more common than people think and being told to sweep them under the rug only makes the kids that are suffering feel even worse than they already do.

The work that my daughter has put in to overcoming her issues has been harder than any of her AP classes and takes up more time than most of her extracurriculars. She is one of the bravest and most self-aware teens I know and she is so much stronger for having faced her issues head-on and received proper treatment. If she chooses to write her application essays about any aspect of her struggles, I am going to applaud her, not try to talk her out of it. And if some adcom decides to turn her down because her essay makes her look like “damaged goods” in their eyes, quite frankly, that’s their loss.

So to the OP I say that if this issue is truly important to you, and it has shaped your life and the way you think about your future, and you can write something meaningful and impactful about it, I say go ahead and write that essay. Adcoms always say they want kids to write in their honest voices about the things that matter to them…maybe if more kids were honest about their struggles there wouldn’t be such a stigma surrounding this in the first place.

sorry - duplicate

Posters are not giving that advice because THEY have negative attitudes about mental illness. They’re giving that advice because ADMISSIONS may have negative attitudes about mental illness.

@zozoty , my daughter also suffers from anxiety, to the point where it had a real effect on her sophomore grades.

So I’m certainly not one to belittle anyone with that, or any other, issue.

But I’m not the one reading the letters and making the decisions.

The OP asked what we thought. We answered to the best of ability, in an effort to help him.

If another topic, or another essay, could do as we were advised by an adcom: “Give them a reason to say yes” then that will be my advice every single time.

@zozoty–We understand. But the goal at this point in time is not to change people’s attitudes about mental problems. The immediate goal is college admission. And right now, at this particular time, in this particular society, this isn’t something you highlight on a college application.

The reason I wouldn’t write about Depression is different. I think it’s been overdone. Not that its not important, but ADCOMS have seen this story before, and have a tendency to stereotype students with this condition. You don’t want to be put in a bucket of “I know this student already.” I think it will take away from your uniqueness unless you find a fresh, new spin and somehow can make it a stand out. For instance, if as in the survivors of the school shooting, you use your experience as fuel to change the world for the better and have taken up a leadership position to make the world a better place.

Here is an example of a personal statement written by an international student. The essay is entirely based around bi-polar depression. The student had support from high school counselors to write about this topic. Recommendation letters also expressed improvement in the student’s mental condition. Not only was this student offered admission by multiple universities, but one even overlooked the fact that GPA and standardized test scores were below the minimum requirements and another university gave a substantial scholarship worth $16,000 per year, totaling $64,000!

This student has given permission to post this essay for others to learn from and personal information has been omitted.

"Ever since I can remember, I’ve been moving through each day riding on an emotional roller-coaster, not sure what would set me off to become either manic or depressed. When mania hit, I’d lock myself in my room, throwing all of the books on the shelf onto the ground and crying out loud, which forced my parents to break all of the doors down. And when I was depressed, I’d lie in my bed for days without eating or drinking, just staring at the ceiling like a living dead.

In school, everyone, including my teachers, seemed to wonder why I was still there. I was constantly told that I would never be successful in life; and I was laughed at and bullied for my conditions, feeling like a miserable outsider. Finally, in 8th grade, after going to different doctors for 4 years and receiving incorrect diagnoses, I was determined as a bipolar disorder patient.

You’d think that knowing my condition was caused by a chemical imbalance could relieve some of the pressure, but this wasn’t the case. I had no one left except for my parents, and my future seemed doomed. Not knowing why I behaved the way I did, or when I would do it again, I lived in constant regret and panic.

I had to take a gap year to focus on regular therapies and medication. Now out of the stressful school environment, life slowed down, and I took a deep look at myself. Most people like me either receive suppression from society, or simply give up in life by choice; my parents, loving me unconditionally, repeatedly told me that I didn’t have to work for a living, as they would support me forever. But I refused to be a wasted person. My life was just starting, and like normal people I also have hopes and dreams. Even though it seemed destined to be a continuous struggle, I promised myself that I would do whatever it took to achieve my goals.

And that’s what I did – one year later, I returned school with a mind stronger than ever. My medication started to work, and I was able to alleviate and control my symptoms through self-adjustment methods. The jeers from my peer continued, but it didn’t stop me from reaching my fullest potential. After entering high school through entrance test like others, I set my sights on an even greater goal. I wanted to study in the US, because I would receive better treatments and more diverse education that satisfies my curiosity.

I can’t say that things were easy since I arrived; I’ve got used to people misunderstanding me for being lazy or spoiled, when I had to take a few days off to get treated or spend the day in my room alone adjusting my mood. But gradually, as I became more open and honest about my condition to people around me, I made some of the closest friends in life.

Everything worked out now – I love the courses and the supportive teachers that forged a comfortable environment for me to thrive in, and I’m more stable and happier than ever before. Maybe I will always be labelled as “sick” or “abnormal” and be judged upon everywhere, but this disease does not define who I am as a person. The reality is, through fighting the disease, I have become a strong-minded person that works harder than probably anyone you know – because I want to, and have to, determine the course of my life and prove those who despised me wrong."

Great. I’m glad things worked out so well for that student.

But my advice to the hundreds of others here who still ask the same question remains the same: Use that topic at your own risk.

There are so many others that don’t carry the same risk.

I agree the topic is overdone. This is not about stigma, @zozoty . Remember that colleges want to admit students who will succeed. They want to admit students who will pay tuition for four years. A student who has to leave school because they succumbed to depression/anxiety/whatever is lost revenue. Write about depression if you like. But why? It’s a battle your child fought and won. That’s wonderful. But is there something more positive a child can share about themselves than that? If so, that might be a better topic to write about.

I’ve been on this site for over 4 years and have read stories from students here that have made me cry. There are so many kids who have battled all kinds of terrible and sad circumstances. Colleges don’t admit kids because they feel sorry for them, and I mean that exactly as I’ve written it. There are definitely extenuating circumstances that colleges should know about: long term illnesses (of which depression could be one), family trauma, death, divorce, etc… That is information that could be in a counselor’s recommendation, or in the additional info section. It is not the best choice for the main Common App essay, no matter how you feel about the topic. Notice I used the word “best.” Sure, plenty of kids will write about depression, abuse, all kinds of things. Some kids will get in by writing about those things. But, most kids are NOT great writers. They don’t write well about such difficult topics. They come off sounding negative, or bitter, or fragile, or weak, or traumatized, but they don’t often convey a sense of triumph, or positivity, or enthusiasm, or happiness.

I help students with college essays professionally. I had a student who had suffered emotional abuse and was totally derailed by it. She wrote her essay about it. I read the essay and it was harrowing. I told her how her essay made me feel. I asked her if that was how she wanted the admissions officer to feel. She had never thought of that. Many kids feel very emotional about these issues, understandably. But they don’t understand that the college admissions officer is not looking for a tell-all confessional of a teen’s troubled life. They want to find reasons to admit the student, they want to see how the student will add positively to the campus environment. Happy students are the best advertisement a college has. Happy students give colleges high retention rates and high yields. Colleges are businesses.

My student did keep her topic, but totally reworked the essay and framed it to show how she was able to find her way back by embracing friendship, etc… It wasn’t a brilliant essay, but it was much better than it was at first. She has a college acceptance, which is great. I tell every student of mine who asks that I do not think they should write about anxiety, depression, etc… There is so much more to every kid I have ever worked with than their mental state.

@Lindagaf

on one hand you advise not to write about mental health illnesses because the topic leads to rejection.

but then you refer to an essay on mental health that someone PAID you to help write and the student gets admitted.

Can you clarify whether or not college essays can be about mental health?

Or are you saying that the quality of any essay topic comes down to the skill of the writer?

any student currently in college can help with college essays professionally.

@OTTO_thefriendlypony , please read my post again. I clearly said that I believe there are better topics, that some students can successfully write about mental illness, that some students who write about it will be accepted. I advised not to write about it for a number of valid reasons. I said that I believe most students can find something else about themselves to share other than their mental illness. I did not say writing about mental illness ALWAYS leads to rejection.

Your college essay can be about whatever you choose, but my opinion is, and will always remain, that there are probabaly better things to write about. I used the adverbs probably, most, better, some, etc…because there will be exceptions to it. Your college of choice might be perfectly happy to accept you if you write about mental illness. I have no way of knowing with certainty, and am simply giving my perspective, as a professional and a person who is very involved in this field.

Yes, the quality of any essay topic comes down to the skill of the writer. I’ve seen plenty of poor essays about everything, not just mental illness. I will hypothetically say that if my student had submitted her essay as originally written, she wouldn’t have been accepted anywhere. I never force a student to change a topic. She wanted to write about it, so I helped her understand why she should write her story in a different way. I do not write my students essays. I help them generate ideas, organize those ideas, expalin those ideas in a clear way, help them highlight their unique voice, etc… I am many years out of college, but by all means, utilize the services of a college student to help with your essays if you choose.