<p>At Harvard ... students learn to get a life. (FWIW)</p>
<p>You could be taking Applied Physics 295a, “Introduction to Quantum Theory of Solids.” Or you could try “Introduction to Repair and Maintenance and Fire Safety,” instead. </p>
<p>The latter is being offered on Feb. 22 in Adams House, part of a new series of free “Life Skills” classes sponsored by the Office of Career Services (OCS). You won’t get academic credit—nor will you use single electron approximation—but you will find out all about radiators. </p>
<p>Our son has learned many of these things. He has had ATV's and cars since he was 15 and learned most basic maintenance jobs such as oil/filter changes, filter changes, tire rotation, spark plug cleaning/regapping/replacement, serpentine belt replacement, cooling system flushes, fluid replacements, brake jobs, lights, fuses etc.</p>
<p>Cooking? When he missed dinner during hs, he had to cook his own many days and can peel, chop, dice, saute, season, prep a roux and whip up a vinagrette with most. And now living off campus the skills are used every day.</p>
<p>Yep, he can use a voltage meter and a food processor with some elementary skill. And he knows how to use every power tool in my shop from middle school projects and church mission projects.</p>
<p>He can repair a computer, a balky electric motor, rewire a lamp, sweat a copper fitting, knows the value of 3 in 1 oil, and knows the need to spend that extra 5 minutes cleaning those $15 brushes after painting.</p>
<p>It something called "quality time" in middle America.</p>
<p>garland, I prefer the term opinionated rather than judgemental, but whatever.</p>
<p>It was not my intent to criticize Harvard but comment upon some interesting aspects of American culture and the parent/child relationship in particular.</p>
<p>I find it amusing that some fathers can find the time to workout 5 hours/week in the gym but then cannot find the time to rake leaves or shovel snow from their driveways with their children, choosing to hire the work out instead. Or how moms would prefer ordering take-away 3 times a week and serving up pre-prepared foods another 2 days than teaching their children how easy it is to make a killer marinara sauce and that minced garlic CANNOT be allowed to burn. Or hire a painter rather than to teach the child how and what brush to use in cutting in around door and window frames. How it is easier to toss the complaining teen another $20 to go out with friends rather than to tell them "too bad you spent your allowance earlier in the week on that (fill in the blank) that you could have easily done without".</p>
<p>Too many of our children lead lives far to detached from the parents whose purpose it is to hand down the common knowledge that will make adult life so much richer and happier.</p>
<p>Have to admit I clicked on this thread because I thought the title was meant for empty nesters (like me) who are struggling to "get a life" at this new stage in our lives. ;)</p>
<p>It is entirely possible to spend lots of time with mom and dad without learning to fix a car or radiator, or paint the house, or learn to cook, especially if mom and dad do not possess those skills. That's where you're being judgmental.
I agree with Garland.</p>
<p>Yup, definitely judgmental, originaloog. I agree with marite's post. </p>
<p>My husband and I would have loved to have taught our children how to do home repairs and maintenance, but regrettably we never learned much in our own homes. Sure, we can do the basics, but they're the basics for a reason: any person of normal intelligence can quickly figure out how to do it and therefore so will our children when the need arises. Paintbrush 101 shouldn't be necessary.</p>
<p>On the other hand, here's where I agree with you, originaloog: The average Ivy League student has probably had to spend so much time studying and saving the world that little to no time was left in his life for such mundane activities as changing the oil in his car or whipping up a vinaigrette. Is this a problem? Depends on your perspectivie, I guess. To the extent that the high-achieving high school life may have distanced the student from his family, yes. To the extent that all it has meant is that the kid never did his own laundry before college, well, that's a simple enough job to learn and years of experience weren't required.</p>
<p>Well, originaloog, in my family, skiing is the opportunity to bond, in part because it's a passion we all share, and you'd be amazed how much talking you can do on the ski lift and the drive to it -- and in part because neither H nor I would have a clue how to fix an ATV even if we had an ATV. </p>
<p>But you are onto something - and that is perhaps manual skills and general lack thereof. It's true that many of us can't FIX things - cars, lamps, plumbing, whatever - or even DO many things manually. And that it's easier to get take-out than to plan/shop/make a home meal. But I gotta tell you: there's only so many hours in a week. And if paying someone to do some chores means more time with my kids - be that skiing or just watching The Daily Show - so be it.</p>
<p>I don't know how to fix stuff either and prefer to hire someone to do yard work. Why should we do this stuff if we don't know how, don't want to learn and/or dislike the activity? I prefer to think of it as "redistribution of wealth" rather than laziness. It makes the people we hire very happy and it makes me happy too. We travel with our kid, another great family bonding experience.</p>
<p>I do admire people who can do all of these things though.</p>
<p>Exactly. This could be the discussion about neat outside-of-curriculum places that kids (and/or us) learn new and different subjects and skills, or it could be the my-parenting-and-my-part-of-the-country-are-better-than-yours discussion.</p>
<p>I vote for the former; we've done the latter to death already.</p>
<p>My daughter often has to prepare her own dinner. This inevitably consists of either takeout or Stouffers. She does not know how to cook and does not have any particular desire to learn.</p>
<p>She has a friend, though, who is an expert cook. But that girl lacks knowledge that is second nature to my daughter -- such as the basics of how to use pharmaceuticals properly. When this girl was taking painkillers after an injury, my daughter had to teach her that it's important not to exceed the recommended dose of acetaminophen. Somehow her parents had never taught her that, just as somehow I never taught my daughter to use any kitchen equipment other than a microwave.</p>
<p>Different families have different strengths.</p>
<p>In the midwest, except for Chicago, it is harder to order out nutritious food (ie not pizza) and find people to do all the tasks so we end up doing a lot we'd rather hire out for, even if we can afford it. Yes, you can find the services, but most will shovel their own driveway, mow their own lawn, do their own shopping etc., regardless of income. Maybe most of us have more time since workday commutes tend to be a lot shorter- such as considering a 1/2 hour commute as long- why not live closer to work... BTW, you learn how to fix stuff by doing it, and reading the public library books plus visits to one of many home stores nearby- it's a matter of personality type, some of us hate to sew (but make curtains and such because of the inability to find what we like, even through decorators...) but like hands on stuff.</p>
<p>I like to cook, and am good at it, but will never make a roux or vinagrette- different foods for different ethnic groups. BTW, if I ever give you a recipe know that every timesaver and shortcut will have been taken without sacrificing taste...I like to tinker in the kitchen.</p>
<p>I thought the thread would be about semester fun courses, such as ballroom dancing or the lit course I took (P/F) in fantasy and science fiction as an excuse for fun reading, the symphony course... How about input on some of the courses offered/taken that don't qualify as necessary to graduate but enrich in nonacademic ways? In Wis. one can sign up for technical college courses to get noncredit useful skills.</p>
<p>I took a pass/fail course on Boston architecture. We mostly did walking tours and drew pictures, though I might have written a paper. I wanted to take an automechanics 101 course before embarking on a year long drive around the country living in a van, but couldn't find one. I took classes in pottery making and film developing that were offered by other students in our house - no credit for either of them, but fun.</p>
<p>Excerpts from the article referenced by twinmom:
[quote]
“Think of it—most college students in this country do live off-campus and learn how to sign a lease, pay rent, cook, clean, and fix a leaky faucet sooner than most Harvard students do,” Julia G. Fox, assistant dean for life skills curriculum development at OCS, wrote in an e-mail.</p>
<p>Other classes offered include “Money Made Simple,” “Health Care After Harvard,” and “Cooking Skills for Clever Scholars.” Participants will learn how to cook their own meals, care for their cars, and operate their radiators. A full schedule of the classes is available under “For Students” at ocs.fas.harvard.edu.</p>
<p>In Adams House Dining Hall last night, several students agreed that while Yard Operations or the House superintendent may be around to fix a broken radiator today, the life skills offered up in the new OCS classes are important for the long run.</p>
<p>The classes—which will be taught by experts including Harvard University Dining Services chefs, House building managers, and the “master technicians” from Fleet Management Services—will present the material in hands-on and seminar-style sessions, Fox said.</p>
<p>The classes will introduce students to real-life skills to be used in real-life situations.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>wis75: There are regular ballroom dancing meets (which MIT kids come to take part in), a thriving scifi society, and other such groups. S's House is about to put on performances of The Marriage of Figaro this coming weekend. These courses seem to me far more geared to preparing students for living on their own.</p>
<p>My husband's great grandfather (90 yrs old), gave this advice, upon hearing my husband had recently graduated from college. "That's all well and good, but now you've got to get out and learn a good trade." His g-gf was digging a new root cellar at the time.</p>