I do think that big parties are pretty fun, though, and there’s a place for them in most students’ college experiences. It’s a different experience without them. Don’t have to get drunk.
At smaller schools, going to sports events is nice. You can go support your friends who are playing. But it’s not super exciting. Same with going to see a play or visiting the art museum or listening to a famous author on campus. All good stuff for sure but sometimes kids want to go to a party, do some dancing, and meet new people.
No biggie. I think it’s just that our kids are having some pretty quiet weekend nights. Different than S19’s experience in 2019. And it’s because of Covid rules.
I graduated from NU and been to some games this year. Yes to tailgating. Winter is coming though. Not sure if as much fun is going to be had when it’s 20 degrees!
" I think it’s just that our kids are having some pretty quiet weekend nights"
I don’t know why you think that. There are tons of parties going on on and off campus at almost every college. Isn’t that what everyone had been saying?
“Dorm” parties are pretty standard for underclassmen. Many dorms are large on campus apartments or suites- and there are plenty of parties in those right now.
I know that for sure. At Colgate, the only game in town for freshmen is the one bar in town and kids wait in line over two hours and sometimes don’t even get in. Don’t get in? It’s back to the quiet dorm. Upper classmen have some very small private parties in their on-campus apartments. Not for the freshmen. As for dorm parties, Colgate put the squelch on those. There’s very little way for the under 21 crowd to buy alcohol anyway.
At Bowdoin, there are no bigger parties. Not even off campus. Smaller groups maybe getting together to hang out but that’s it. Not every school has “tons of parties” going on.
That why I “think that”. Info straight from our kids. We cannot use a blanket statement and say all colleges have parties going on. These small campuses rely on fraternities and social houses on campus for those and they are not allowed right now.
Not trying to argue. Just giving info…and how do I know “our kids are having pretty quiet weeknights”? Um, because our D will text me on Sat night saying they’ve struck out again trying to find something to do. Funny because, when she was looking at Colgate here, we had a lot of feedback to watch out for all of the drinking! So far, it’s been pretty hit or miss. If you don’t get into that one bar, there’s not much else to do right now. She hears there might be a party in a tent outside of one of the frats for Halloween.
Anyway, those are details. My point is that not all schools are hopping with parties. Not sure why you think I’m making that up. I think it’s relevant information for anyone looking at colleges this year if they want to know what the social life is like on campuses right now. Hopefully, things will be looking up in the spring.
Is there a rule, in the town where Bowdoin is, that says adults 21+ can’t have parties in their off campus residences (even larger groups)? If not, then not not sure how it’s possible that everyone stopped having large parties now (if that was a thing before).
The alcohol situation for underclassmen is the alcohol situation for underclassmen of always… they get it from 21+ upperclassmen or find other ways.
All I can say is that it’s pretty common for lowly freshman to get shut out of large parties and they generally don’t go to bars because they don’t have fakes or don’t have good fakes.
I know from my own kids (friends/social media) that there are lots of parties going on in the Northeast colleges (they never went away in the south). You are right that some college sponsored or frat (often ticketed, and even some dry for under 21s) large parties may not be happening right now, per the college’s choice. MIT and Harvard used to throw those types of ticketed events… I wonder if Halloween will change all that and bring them back (where they have not yet come back). Not sure why they wouldn’t since other large ticketed events and bars etc, are all open.
Bowdoin kids typically do not live off campus. It’s a residential college for four years. They did allow a number of kids to live off campus this year because the college was overenrolled this year but those kids are not throwing parties for anyone other than their close friends. Like I said, Bowdoin kids all vaccinated. Fewer than five kids got exemptions. But they still test everyone twice a week with PCR tests. No one wants to be the kid who threw a party and starts a spike of Covid. Some kids in one of the dorms did that early. It resulted in 30 cases and other students were furious with those kids because Bowdoin then cancelled some events and went back to only grab and go dining for two weeks.
Now the college is back to dining in 100 percent. Kids are even allowed to take masks off in the student union if they are sitting alone. I don’t think indoor parties at soph houses are in the cards for winter. I’m sure they will try their best to keep doing outdoor events as long as they can. There have been some concerts and other sorts of entertainment like that so that’s been an option some nights. Colgate hasn’t had much like that.
I’m sorry for the experience your D is having, and I understand it is likely different than she hoped it would be. Hopefully all of that time hanging with a smaller crowd in a quieter setting is at least giving them lots of bonding time to develop really strong, solid friendships. Hoping she gets to enjoy a more active spring semester!
That’s too bad. I’m not sure when their worries will subside. Covid is here forever and winter is coming (and will come every year). There will always be cases - it’s endemic, that’s why the vaccine mandate was put in place. Sounds really sad when kids are trading between “eating inside” and standard college freedom.
Is your son off campus? How does he feel about it all now that he’s a senior (he took a semester for coop and extended his time at Bowdoin so he’d have a more normal experience, if I recall)
Colleges do have wildly different risk tolerance levels, even similar colleges in similar locations. Plenty of parties happening at Princeton after an awful lockdown last year.
Ouch, I’m sorry Homerdog, I know how much you were hoping for normalcy for your kids this year, and it sounds quite disappointing on their campuses (although perhaps significantly better than last year, I hope). I do think from reading this thread with reports of lots of parties at BC, Pitt, Duke, Northwestern (even without the frats which I think is not a covid-related issue), Harvard, another Boston university, Amherst, SDSU, Colby, Princeton, that a large proportion of colleges are back to having fairly thriving party scenes, and I hope that as time goes by, Bowdoin and Colgate ease their restrictions as it seems reasonably safe under the conditions of vaccine mandates and perhaps frequent testing (with most schools seemingly requiring masks in academic buildings). In addition to this thread, from talking to people I know parties are back in pretty full swing at Fairfield, UVA, BU, Villanova, UMiami, and others. Since commuter-based colleges are largely off-campus lifestyles, they are presumably back to normalish, too. So it is sounding like, as a country, college kids are mostly back to a mostly normal experience, with some mitigation (masks, tests, etc) thrown in, but with big variations of course!! Some of those variations may be way too lenient (huge schools without vaccine requirements acting like there’s no covid) and some perhaps too restrictive (what you are describing), but I think from this thread I’m getting the sense that this is a vastly different year on campuses than last year, going in the direction of normalcy, including parties. I haven’t heard any major news of horrible outbreaks on campuses that led to major hospitalizations or other bad outcomes among students or staff, at least not in a newsworthy way, but it sure will be great to have our nations caseloads plummet further and hopefully stay low!
I agree with DeeCee above that there can be silver linings on the quieter campuses……deep friendships can develop and bonding over frustrating things can be very effective!! They will get past this quiet time and look back and laugh about their freshman fall.
That is great to hear Princeton is back to normalish like Duke ! D23 visited/toured and loved it, but I didn’t know how strict they were being with covid this yr. It is helpful to get a sense of different colleges on here.
I’m sorry your daughter isn’t having the experience you were hoping.
Is Colgate hockey allowing spectators? If so, your D should go to games…even if she thinks she hates hockey ; ). ECAC hockey is the best and there is sooooo much amazing energy at the games. The season will run from now until the end of February. We went to all our home games when we were in college which takes care of both Friday and Saturday nights for those weekends.
Such wide ranging restrictions. On the flip side of Princeton, Oberlin just removed the OUTDOOR mask requirement yesterday, and dining is now in person but reduced capacity (6 ft distance)
S19 lives on campus is a dorm with all of his friends. He’s all good. He’s really only a soph still. Has four semesters left after this one. He’s so busy with running and schoolwork. They do socialize in small groups and he’s cool with that. Just wants to preserve in-person dining!
@DeeCee36 d21 is making lots of good friends and I agree that this semester is about bonding and finding friends and getting settled. Hopefully the energy will return soon!
Mandate schools had to let some staff go because of noncompliance. Also there was concern generally among administrators that kids pent up during the pandemic would go nuts with behavior this year. Two more reasons why administrators might be especially careful about allowing big parties if easily controlled. A third if the school had bad “me too” publicity I’m the past. Then they don’t want a Covid outbreak reported. Perhaps once this cycle’s apps are in, they will loosen up the reins.
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