@bamamom2021 Is it possible that you visited the college with rude students during finals week? If not, would you name that college? Thanks!
As I am sure there are parents who have students at the school we toured, I am not comfortable naming it. Tours can be very overwhelming and it is easy to be wowed by buildings and dazzled by talk of clubs, majors, research, opportunities, etc. I spent my time watching the people - the staff, faculty, and students. Were they relaxed and happy? Were they helpful and polite? Were they thriving and growing? Were they engaged in learning and working? Unfortunately, at this school the students and staff did not present a place where I (or my child) would want to spend time. Everyone needs to try to figure out the feel for themselves if possible. If it is not possible to visit, then they need to ask the good questions and listen as students from their area describe their school and the experiences they are having.
Well, this thread is not very useful if the colleges aren’t named.
@bamamom2021 - There have been lots of comments naming schools. I honestly don’t think anyone is going to be offended. We all know that kids and families have different priorities, interests and that fit is highly subjective.
funny about this: "Yesterday 3-6pm was a big Pokemon Go event "
Shows how people should take what is viewed during visits to campus with a grain of salt.
I will chime in with the name of one school that stood out for having overwhelmingly nice, thoughtful students. When we visited University of Dayton we were impressed to see not only that students ALWAYS held open the doors for us, but for each other as well. When I commented on it to a Dayton recent grad they said, “Oh, yeah. That’s our culture. That’s just what we do.” The students at Dayton looked happy, social, chatting as they hustled across campus in blustery weather. Jean, t-shirts, sweatshirts, unpretentious. Almost seemed like a blast from the past. They also had a consistent message: Dayton=Community. From admissions presentation to not-so-recent grads, the best thing about Dayton was the people/friends/sense of COMMUNITY.
D18 liked the school, honors college, financial package, and sense of community, but…ended up in San Diego.
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Up - Gettysburg. Extremely impressive biology/biochem program, professors and students. Beautiful campus. Just a great vibe. A lot of opportunities to thrive. Reputation as a party school was a negative before, but not after visiting and speaking with students.
Down - Lafayette. S is still very impressed, although not a financial fit. As a parent, however, I was not happy with the FA department. At other schools approachable, not at all here. Abrupt and dismissive.
@momofsenior1 @1stTimeThruMom Carnegie Mellon University
CMU is an amazing school but it wasn’t for my DD either. There were plenty of schools my daughter thought were terrible fits for her that are super well regarded and loved by others. That’s the beauty of college in the US. So many options!
Some of our favorite schools that my D did not end up attending, but would have been happy to go to were:
Small- Gettysburg. Agree with above. The vibe was great. Although a small student body, there was great energy on campus. It just felt very good.
Medium- Miami University of Ohio. What a gem. Beyond beautiful, great business school, generous merit, and one of the nicest/cutest towns right outside of the campus. Loved, loved this school!
Large- Purdue. The surprise of the admissions process. It was the first big state school we saw and it threw all my stereotypes out the window. Beautiful campus, lively, but not chaotic, amazing facilities, well-organized, and just felt like a great place to go to school.
William and Mary, the kids and likewise the dining staff were incredibly warm with one another. It was like the dining staff were their surrogate great aunts. I was also floored with how chatty, engaged, and happy the kids at the dining hall of Wesleyan were. It was like a movie set that the director said, “ok, 1,2,3 talk.” But it was real. The dining hall was abuzz with happy, engaged kids. I also noticed that kids of all colors were sitting mixed. There was no group of say, Asian kids or black kids. Every grouping had a mix, like a brochure.
CMU is my husband’s alma mater(and also his dad’s). Not on the radar for either kid as not a good fit (and too much money). 
But great academics and good fit for others. Glad you named the school, that’s part of the fun! Most people here can take the negatives, even if It relates to a school they know and love!
Just starting visits with my D21, but after a So Cal spring break trip:
Up: USC. Our expectations were down around our ankles after all the recent news, but it was bustling, fun, clean, and with every potential major my daughter is considering, plus wonderful study abroad options. She even liked the gritty neighborhood (“it’s real!”).
Down: Pomona and brethren. I was holding my breath expecting to lecture about not getting attached to a dream school this early, but no! It was too deserted (even at lunch), too protective, too far from LA (no grit). It really turned her off that they paid a stipend students that got unpaid internships so they could afford to do them. “How will they ever cope after graduation?” Go figure.
Medium: Caltech. Went from #1 to probably one of many. Lots of strengths, but they chose to show off the oldest dorm rather than the one that was just built, and stressed research to the exclusion of all else, even though they do have great job placement as well. Just goes to show that marketing is not their strongest suit, and we won’t condemn them for that!
@bobo44 Thanks for your report, really want to get out to Dayton as I hear great things about it! Did your daughter end up at SDU, the Catholic University, or another school?
I grew up in Ohio and it seems like every comment I’ve heard about the University of Dayton has been very positive.
The city of Dayton, on the other hand…
Down: Pomona. When we visited, the weather was supreme. We walked into campus near the tennis courts as play was just finishing up and it was sort of hushed like Wimbledon or something. The quaint buildings and beautiful landscape made for a lovely setting. The building we checked in at was Q-U-I-E-T. We found it all to be just a beautiful backdrop for a very dry presentation and tour. We actually whispered as we walked. We even asked two different staff members (because we thought the first one must be wrong) if students were on Spring Break. Down the list it went.
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@bamamom2021 still shaking my head. How many times was your daughter cat-called?! Once is one too many times. Yikes!
@GnocchiB She was “only” cat called one time by some boys sitting outside of a building. The guide tried to talk over them but they kept trying to get her attention and for her to look over/come over. She had no idea they were talking to her at first but she was the only girl near them and the guide confirmed that they were addressing her. The guide made it worse by joking to my DD that she should get used to the attention if she attends because she is “moderately attractive”. I think he was embarrassed and trying to make it funny but it was odd, insulting, and awkward. I was at the back of our small group and I moved forward and stood by her the rest of the time. Before there is any thought of what she could be wearing, she was in jeans, boots, sweater, jacket and scarf --not that it should make any difference at all but I am sure some people are thinking she must have done something - especially since she is only “moderately attractive”. That entire tour was unusual. We told the guide we had to leave and ducked out at the last stop of the tour.
@bamamom2021 that sounds absolutely awful all around!
I would have bet money that you were describing Berkeley. That was our exact experience.