<p>I grew up in China, and what I gather from the people around me is that they severely discourage certain behaviors. Students here don't like to ask questions (in fear of being called stupid), say hi to new people, chat with teachers, discuss the material, etc etc. For instance, they wouldn't even say thank you to teachers who helped with apps etc because they think it's unnecessary. They won't message their fellow freshmen in fb and say hi/congrats because they think it's creepy. They won't chat with teachers because it's apparently a kissass behavior.</p>
<p>I know that in the US, people are encouraged to take initiative. But since I'm not used to this culture, I'm just wondering how much is 'enough'. How can I talk to new people without them thinking that I'm creepy? I try to be as friendly as possible; I'm just scared that people find it off-putting. Also, how much initiative should be taken in presenting yourself to professors? I will definitely try to talk to them during office hours, after class, etc - but about what? Should I always try to bring the class material to the conversation, should I praise them about their lectures, should I just ask about what research they are doing? This kind of behavior is always labeled 'kiss-assy' here, so I really need some opinions from people who have been exposed to the US culture.</p>
<p>Thanks, and sorry if this is a dumb question.</p>
<p>I have to say, you are seriously misinformed. People here couldn’t be more different. My advice is to stop worrying and just be yourself and don’t get caught up ion what others think of you…really. Sure there may be the occasional person that have the attitude you described, but America is exceptionally diverse and not everyone is like that. Actually I would say the great majority aren’t.</p>
<p>If you’re in college want to meet new people, try to join a student organization that sounds interesting to you. Meeting and talking to new people is a necessary and natural part of being in an organization or club. You’ll gradually get to know people and feel more comfortable talking to them.</p>
<p>If you have questions for a professor during or after class, by all means ask them. Don’t talk just for the sake of talking, but rather because you have something to contribute to the discussion.</p>
<p>Actually, in comparison to how it sounds in China, I think you are spot on, and I would say 4everdancer is wrong. You are not misinformed. Yes, many many people do not try to contact the professor, but the more successful ones do. Do not congratulate them on the lecture, that sounds above and beyond. Do not contact the professor unless there is something you genuinely want to discuss. The best students are interested in the subject enough to naturally have subjects they want to discuss with the teacher, though. </p>
<p>Creepy would be if you barged in on a conversation, or kept on talking to someone who obviously wasn’t interested in talking to you. Just be pleasant and you will be fine.</p>
<p>Observe American students and do what they do. Asking questions in class is normal and so is talking to the professor before or after class or during office hours.</p>
<p>And saying “thank you” to a person who helped you is considered normal and polite, to not say thank you to a person who helped you, especially with grad school apps, is impolite!</p>
<p>As for contacting class mates online, I’d say it’s best for small classes and to people you have already had at least one conversation with in person. Usually there is some kind of club or group for your major and it might have a facebook page, like the Society of Aerospace Engineers at Ball State University (I’m just making that up, if it’s real then I’m psychic). As for contacting girls, well…those rules are being re-written daily!</p>
<p>Thanks for the feedback! 
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<p>Lol, ok, praising a professor’s lecture is really ‘off’ XD Maybe pinpointing an area of the subject that I’m really interested in and discussing it with the prof will be a nicer way of putting it. In short, I’m just going to have to show my curiosity and interest in the subjects. </p>
<p>@4everdancer and redpoint hmmm, yes - I’m aware that some students also stay passive in college. However, what differentiates US and China most, I think, is the student-teacher interaction. This probably is because I came from a small, rural and traditional high school - but there is some sort of ‘rigidity’ and ‘tension’ between teachers and students here. Thank you for the suggestions!! </p>
<p>@TomServo I was referring to the NU admitted student FB page. I had some people messaging me, saying ‘hi’ and whatnot so I thought that was the norm X) Thanks for the suggestion, btw! I will try to observe what other students do and be a more active learner. (lol @ that last sentence cuz I’m a girl :D)</p>
<p>volunteer information and make lots of eye contact.</p>
<p>that’s basically the essence of american communication.</p>