Daughter going to Cairo

Parents Forum
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<p>My daughter is 17 and taking Arabic as her major subject in college. She loves languages and enjoys studying them.
Now her program includes a year abroad and she is scheduled to go to Cairo next year to improve on her language skills.</p>

<p>While searching the internet for information I found this article on BBC BBC</a> NEWS | Middle East | Egypt voices: Sexual harassment describing how widespread sexual harrassment in Egypt is and it left me terribly worried. </p>

<p>If this what happens to Arab women, what about a Caucasian girl who lives in Cairo with her family hundreds of miles away? I should add that my daughter always dresses very modestly, never wears tank tops or short skirts and would not even mind wearing head scarf or veil to protect herself. She is very inexperienced, although she has traveled in the USA and Europe with her parents, but also by herself.</p>

<p>What can I do to protect her? Have other parents encountered the same situation and can give me advice? Has anyone lived in Cairo or attended university there, who can comment on the situation from a woman's view.</p>

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<p>My son went to Cairo as a HS junior with a school trip. One of the girls on the trip had an unfortunate experience with a vendor at one of the street markets which he helped avert. The vendor told her he had some more special garments in back, took her back there and tried to "help" her try them on. From what he told me, she just needs to be very aware of her circumstances. Don 't be alone, don't go off with anyone alone. Obviously dress modestly.</p>

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<p>The money is so dirty your hands will turn black handling it. Be certain to take hand sanitizers.</p>

<p>Always wear long sleeves; long skirts calf length; hat or head scarf. She should see how the other female students dress and dress as they do. Check with other female students who have attended the study abroad program.</p>

<p>Fodor's and Frommer's have on line forums where you can post questions and read what other travelers suggest.</p>

<p>Here is what the Frommer's section on tips for women says - this is just a paragraph from the section - you can find more on their website:</p>

<p>First, recognize that simply by being an unaccompanied woman, you are perceived as potentially available. Second, realize that though Egypt is a highly controlled and repressive society, the West is viewed as free and easy, particularly with regard to matters of sexual relations. Western women are frequently portrayed in the media as promiscuous, and they figure large in the Egyptian-male imagination as the answer to their stifled dreams.</p>

<p>Most important, dress conservatively. Bare arms and legs will indicate that you are the loose Westerner of their imagination, and you will find the level of harassment increasing commensurately. Tight jeans and tops are better than shorts and a tank top, but not by much. Best to stick to loose pants or sensible, ankle- or mid-calf-length skirts and frumpy long-sleeved tops.</p>

<p>Avoid eye contact. As much as revealing clothing, this is seen as another signal that you are interested. Unfortunately, so is laughing. Allowing a man to put his hand on you, a liberty that an uninterested Egyptian woman would never allow -- whether on your hand, forearm, or shoulder -- will also indicate to him that you are open to further advances.</p>

<p>The Egypt portion of this page also suggests the website Journeywoman which has a free e-newsletter and advice for women travelers. Frommer's and Fodor's also have free e-newsletters.</p>

<p>My D's 20 year old roommate wanted to study abroad in Egypt, but her parents after investigation decided they were uncomfortable with letting their daughter attend the program.</p>

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<p>We lived in Egypt for 3 years (though it was 20 years ago and I believe there is more fundamentalism now) and never ran into problems. I was older than your daughter of course being in my early 30s. Definitely dress modestly out of respect for the culture - no tank tops, low cut tops, short shorts. I knew of 2 assault attempts on expats when I lived there - one English girl I did know who was the victim of an attempted assault was out running in very short shorts and another girl was assaulted when she was making out in a car in a public place and she and her partner were attacked. Although neither girl deserved what happened to them it was very inappropriate behaviour in a country with like that. Not appropriate. And as ebeeeee said - be aware of your circumstances just like you would in any big city. </p>

<p>Good point about touching that might be no deal here being regarded otherwise there. I took horseriding lessons out by the pyramids (really cool place to ride - just tell her to go in a group if she does it) and when the fat old instructor put his hand on my leg to reposition it i didn't think much of it until I realized that by not reacting negatively he took it wrongly - put that right pretty quick. Our early days there we mostly had a driver but the last year I would get the train into Cairo (we lived in Maadi - a suburb) and go to the shops and markets. I did tend to stride around and not catch people eye but that is kind of the norm in London where I am from.</p>

<p>The money is really dirty.</p>

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<p>The BBC article is horrifying but it corroborates what I have heard about Egypt and indeed other Arabic countries. Unless a woman has a male escort to protect her, she is assumed to be available, no matter what she is wearing or even if she has a child. </p>

<p>And available doesn't mean she has to "want it." Just fair game for whatever a guy can get away with. The only defense is another guy to protect her "honor." It seems to be an ingrained cultural thing.</p>

<p>In my opinion, the women should start fighting back with weapons, not just words.</p>

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<p>Don't know about weapons...in my mind if you are in their country you have to make an attempt to understand their culture and take reasonable precautions. I do know I was glad it was my HS son that went and not my daughter. The teachers were less than careful and DS felt responsible to make sure he went wherever the girls wanted to go as it was not okay for them to be out along. As mommusic said, the defense is to be with a man. A male escort is the best protection.</p>

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<p>A year sounds too long to spend in this type of environment. I'd try hard to talk her out of it.</p>

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<p>I recommend looking at the U.S. Department of State web site information about safety issues in Egypt:</p>

<p>[url=<a href="http://travel.state.gov/travel/cis_pa_tw/cis/cis_1108.html#safety%5DEgypt%5B/url"&gt;http://travel.state.gov/travel/cis_pa_tw/cis/cis_1108.html#safety]Egypt[/url&lt;/a&gt;]&lt;/p>

<p>Maybe you have already seen it. Will your daughter be enrolled in a university in Cairo, or how will the language instruction be handled? Does her college have a campus there?</p>

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<p>ebeee--didn't mean to imply worriedmom's D should carry a weapon! But there needs to be a revolution...</p>

<p>I presume the program is American University in Cairo. Are there programs in other countries that might be as good and safer? Dubai?</p>

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<p>
[quote]
I knew of 2 assault attempts on expats when I lived there

[/quote]
How many american women were assaulated in the same time period in the U.S.?</p>

<p>As long as you're careful and considerate of the customs there, it will be fine. I felt safer in Cairo than I did walking in Madrid by myself.</p>

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<p>Does she have to go to Cairo? My daughter studied Arabic in Fez, Morocco with no problems at all. She dressed modestly and had a fine time. Other than being offered 20,000 camels for her hand in marriage she felt very ordinary there.</p>

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<p>All the children of my friends and colleagues who study Arabic seem to be going to Syria. It is not quite as easy to enter the country as an America since you have to get a visa ahead of time unlike Egypt where you buy the visa on arrival, but once in from my own experience it is very friendly to Americans on the local level. I have an Australian friend whose daughter was studying there last year. That said, I would have hesitations with a daughter. I wouldn't with my son. He has travelled all over the region, but a girl on her own.....? Syria</a> Sees Influx of Arabic Language Students : NPR</p>

<p>The only students I know who are studying currently in Cairo are males and they are Egyptians so they know the ropes. Our female Egyptian students have gone on to study in England.</p>

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<p>Is she going through an organized program, or on her own? That would seem to make a difference as well. If through a program, I would guess that they have advice, protection, and adults to supervise and help out. If on her own, it sounds as though it might be a little dicey...</p>

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<p>I visited Cairo only as a tourist. However, in my opinion, Cairo is a horrible place. I would never allow a daughter of that age to go there. I cannot imagine it being a pleasant experience, on any level.</p>

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<p>My daughter - at age 16-17, spent 7 weeks in Cairo two summers ago, and loved absolutely every minute of it. She lived with a family, traveled to and from classes using public transportation, and went on excursions. Just wasn't an issue. She knew how to dress appropriately for the country.</p>

<p>There hasn't been a murder of an American student in Libya, Egypt, Syria, Jordan, Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, Iraq, etc. in 30 years. (The same is not true in Israel.) If you want to be really worried, think about Virginia. And if you are concerned about rape or sexual assault, well, any American college campus - 70,000 alcohol-related rapes and sexual assaults each year. And this isn't even accounting for all the sexual harrassment.</p>