I think it was Warren Buffett who said that he would give his children enough so that they could choose to do anything but not so much that they could choose to nothing. That sounded quite sensible to me.
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Some colleges provide long term outcomes by major, so one can view common paths from major to career. For example, after 10 years the vast majority of Brown history majors earned a graduate degree. By far the most common graduate degree for Brown history majors was a JD. A good portion pursued other graduate degrees as well. Specific totals for the class of 2010 are below:
JD – 13 (1 Current Student)
MA – 9 (3 History, 6, non-History)
MBA – 5
MS – 4
PhD – 3 (2 in History, 1 Current Student)
MD – 2
MEd – 2
MFA – 1
MSW – 1
Continuing with the class of 2010, the job titles are one one would expect from the grad degrees, with many attorneys and managers/executives, as well as a significant number of financial analysts and teachers. However, there were also some more unique job titles. Some of these include:
- Associate Preservation Planner at Landmark Society of Western NY
- Foreign Affairs Officer at US Dept of State
- Forester at Trees Atlanta
- Independent Author
- Independent Voice Actor
- Infantry Officer at US Army
- Literary Director at NY Theater Workshop
- Policy Researcher at Rhode Island Governor’s Office
- Producer at 99% Invisible
- Regional Voter Protection Director at Biden for President
- Reporter at Boston Guardian
I’d add that it goes beyond college prestige and/or parental support. It includes access to information about what is required to make oneself employable with these types of majors. And that access is harder to come by for some students. It is possible to get a self-supporting job right out of undergrad (though it may require relocating from a high cost of living area). But one has to learn somehow, whether from parents, guidance counselors, career centers, the internet even, that skills XYZ are valuable, etc. The problem is that we don’t know what we dont know.
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wistful sigh If I had it to do over again, knowing what I know now (and only if knowing what I know now!) I’d do something like this, instead of the practical, technical degree I chose. But that’s a topic for another thread. 
Back to the original question, which was posed here on CC to parents who probably skew higher in SES and education (at least at this point in their lives) than the general public, the majority seem to fall into the “let them choose their major” camp, as I do. That also doesn’t preclude some concerns.
Additionally, here in my very high COL state, parents have come to accept that their children will likely end up living somewhere else.
Such an interesting discussion. We are a musical family. I was raised in a family that strongly felt music was something you could do as an extracurricular, but it was never a consideration as an education or career path. I played throughout college and continue to perform to this day in various orchestras, but ended up with a health care profession and love my work as well as the stability and flexibility it affords.
My husband switched to a music degree partway through college because it was all he could see himself doing. It took him about 10 years to complete is BA because he would drop out and go on the road with a different band whenever the opportunity arose. He would give most parents fits, but he paid for his own education. Did he lose out on income and opportunities for financial stability during those 10 years? Probably. Did he have fabulous opportunities and experiences on the road? Absolutely. When he was ready to “settle down” and buy a home and start a family, he switched to teaching and completed his credential and masters degrees. He always called teaching his “day gig”, but again was happy with his choices.
Fast forward 25 years and 3 kids later. We had a decent but not huge amount of money to contribute for each college education and each kid knew that they would need to support themselves once they graduated. Our third is an amazing musician. When he was considering music performance, I remember him asking my input. He absolutely could not picture himself doing anything else. I told him to of course pursue music and that the world needs musicians like him. He secured a full merit scholarship at a great conservatory. Of course there is no guarantee of success and security in his profession. But some like my son have the combination of gifts/traits which make it possible. In no particular order: talent, the ability to self promote and seek out opportunities, absolute joy in the daily hours of practice, the ability to live on a tight budget and enjoy it, and a comfort level with the uncertainty of the profession. When I see him and his fellow conservatory classmates, not only how they perform but how they view their art as a way to touch the world, I know that this is the right decision for him. However, I would also say that if the pursuit of his dream involved coming out of school with debt we may have guided him in a safer direction.
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So on this thread we’ve heard that many (most?) doctors and lawyers don’t enjoy their jobs. It makes me wonder whether there is higher job satisfaction amongst people who haven’t pursued an overtly pre-professional course of study and instead have carved out their own niche, especially if they chose a pre-professional path because it was perceived to lead to a higher income job.
Perhaps that also correlates with higher SES parents being able to support kids to find their own niche, ie it’s a luxury of the wealthy to let their kids pursue their passion.
Well that is fantastic. Good for him!
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I’ve never tried to influence my DD’s career choice, though I have offered advice as she tries to figure it out. She is very aware of what she’d need to earn to maintain the standard of living she’s used to. She was initially headed towards a very lucrative field but has decided that she needs to spend her life in public interest. I suspect she’ll end up making decent money by leading an organization. But she will likely never earn as much as me. Because I want her to pursue her passions without worrying about money, I’ve made sure she can financially do so. I make no apologies for helping her financially. She’s an only child so it’ll all be hers one day anyway. And some parental support won’t make her any less driven.
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All undergraduate majors (except perhaps something like “general studies”) have some major-related career directions that they are associated with. Arts, history, biology, English, and other liberal arts majors are not exceptions. However, various characteristics of such career directions, such as competitiveness and pay levels, vary.
A better approach is to ensure that the student is well informed about the major-related career directions, including whether a graduate is likely to need to look for career directions in the general job market if the major-related job market is too small or too competitive (or the educational path to it is too competitive). The student’s personal finance habits matter also. The happily frugal student has many financially sustainable options of career directions. The spendy one not so much.
Here is an example of how spendy habits limit what financially sustainable options of career directions the student has. Of course, if such a limited set of options does not include any that the student has talent and passion in, then that student is unlikely to find career happiness.
I think “kids” should decide for themselves. It may be partly because I live in NYC, but growing up my offspring knew lots of people in the arts who never really made it even though they were talented. I remember my D at age 13 coming home and telling me that a woman who was in a show with her for her vocal coach’s students “was Maggie in a Chorus Line on Broadway and she hasn’t worked in 10 months!” So, I didn’t have to tell them how risky a career in the arts could be. However, some of the most successful of my offspring’s childhood friends and acquaintances are in the arts. Not everyone has made the big time, but some have and they not only make a heck of a lot of money, they enjoy life. One or two are famous.
I think that as a group they’ve been more successful than those interested in being academics. Getting a tenure track position is a long slog. Some never make it and end up as adjuncts.
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I have a relative who majored in history and is a podiatrist. Another friend’s kid double-majored in a language and some other field and is doing IB (no masters). My S took no business courses but is happily earning his living buying and reselling all sorts of things via e-commerce. He has BEE.
Oh another relative majored in mandarin and international business and is completing her training to become an osteopathic doctor.
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Isn’t it more like most never make it to tenure or even tenure track and end up having to do some plan B? Perpetual adjunct work is one such plan B, and probably not a very satisfying one. However, a CS PhD landing an industrial research job may find that to be a much more satisfying plan B.
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Small sample size but it seems anyone from my class who wanted academia got it. There was someone a year above me who hung around for years after a drawn out masters and got a very big admin job in academia (hint, hint). My theory is that the competition has been so fierce (in the last 30 years for EE/CS/comp PhDs that it made academia path smoother.
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In my experience many young adults underestimate the salary needed to sustain their lifestyle. Or perhaps they are willing to have a very frugal lifestle at 25 or even 30, but as they age closer to 40 and factors such as a house and children become more important, their priorities might change. I had a job I loved at 30 but would never be willing to do at age 35. People value different things in a career at different points. Ideally one would be able to shift career-focus at different times, but that depends largely upon acquring an in-demand skill set, which may be easiest done in one’s youth.
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Yes, having kids makes it harder to be ultra frugal and nimble.
I hadn’t really quite planned it like this but my kids learned a lot shopping for the household with me. Groceries, the occasional coffee out, I had them with me many times. I’m not once to grouch about prices in front of them and I don’t pick the cheapest groceries but I abhor waste.
@soozievt, I am sincerely glad for you that your daughters love their work, are wealthy and married, etc. That is great. And Bill Gates dropped out of
college and made zillions, but he would not recommend it. Such success is not necessarily the norm for graduates- unlike your kids, most people don’t own condos in Manhattan early in their adulthood. It is great that your’s do, but most don’t, and one’s relative level of risk tolerance is a curb to your “follow your dream” advice
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[quote=“thumper1, post:1, topic:3612962”]
Interesting question and very interesting discussion. Answers vary greatly from family to family, as expected. Short answer for our family: No.
(Very) Long Answer:
D17 and D21 are both pretty money savvy, know the value of a dollar and were employed throughout high school and now college and grad school. We taught both how to prepare a budget so that they would know what it costs to be self-supporting.
We did not try to direct them towards majors in high paying fields (though, I know a certain grandparent who definitely did, and still does 
).
They both chose their own college majors and both ended up selecting majors in lower paying fields.
D17 majored in Environmental and Natural Resource Economics in college. She had a very large merit scholarship, graduated one year early, moved out on her own, worked in her chosen field and also saved for graduate school. She supported herself.
She is now starting grad school, fully funding her tuition with her own savings, plus a sizeable merit scholarship and some financial aid which is based on her own income. She is studying to be … wait for it … a High School Biology teacher. So, there you go.
D21 just finished her first year at college and is majoring in … wait for it … Hotel and Tourism Management. She worked at a boutique Inn before college and just secured a paid internship at her “dream hotel” this summer. We are full pay, with a small outside merit scholarship sponsored by a professional inns and resorts association.
Ironically, DH and I were true children of the 1980’s and we yuppie’d our way through law school and business school into lucrative legal and business careers. We were both highly money motivated, as were all of our friends.
I ultimately burnt out and wanted to stay home with the children, which I did. DH has always truly enjoyed his work. He has been a good role model for what it looks like to have a successful career working really hard at something that you love. However, the rest of us believe that he works much too hard. He has worked 24/7 in C-level positions for much of his career.
We now believe that both of our D’s have wisely chosen majors and careers that will keep things interesting, provide good quality of life and offer job security (at least for teaching). We see each of their respective careers as being a good “fit” for each D’s personality, passions and talents. Definitely NOT big earnings but “enough,” and that’s ok with us.
We have a 3-word family mantra that we have repeated many, many times in our home. Simply put, it’s our wish and hope for both of our D’s to become “successful” adults who are:
”Healthy, Happy and INDEPENDENT.”
That’s it. How they get there is really their own path to choose.
So, did we encourage majors in high paying fields? Nope. But, we did encourage each D to select a major/career that sparks passion, with the understanding that they would need to be self-supporting after graduation. Extra credit for their buy-in of the premise that hard work brings reward.
And so, their dreams have become our dreams. We think that D17 will be a rockstar biology teacher (who, yes, will probably need a summer gig to supplement her income). We also think that D21 will make an awesome hotelier someday, but she’ll need to tighten her belt in the beginning of her career. They can also change their minds. Nothing is set in stone.
We will be quite satisfied if their choices lead to becoming healthy, happy and independent — but, not necessarily wealthy — adults.
(We do acknowledge that our family operates from a fortunate and privileged position. We did not need any loans to pay college tuition — our kids are debt free, except for D17’s small car loan which she pays. Nor are we URM’s, immigrants, first generation, etc.)
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I’m in the “give them all the information so they can make their own decisions” camp.
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@1NJParent, you summarized it better than I did.
There has been a lot of discussion about music so one more. From a conversation with a bunch or recent PhD’s in music: “Charles Ives sold insurance. That’s the vibe.” Some of them are working outside of music AND outside of academia, even after 12 years of post-secondary study of music. No regrets. Music remains in their lives, and they seem to have access to all kinds of jobs. I really think the same is true for undergrads.
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