<p>We killed it? Your question, frankly, indicates that you are an elitist with little respect for accomplishments of others outside of academic success. You say “People need to get smarter.” I say that some people are inherently smarter than others or are born into an environoment where academic success is encouraged more and therefore perform at higher standards. I’m not about to suggest that people are only smart because they work hard, because frankly, I know plenty of people who work extremely hard in high school, yet do not perform as well as other more gifted students. My high school is extremely diverse and has some of the lowest test scores in the county, and I still find that I fit in just fine and get along very well with my peers. </p>
<p>My advice for your dating and friend problems? Drop your attitude. I don’t think your community is the issue. Be modest, humble, and appreciate the accomplishments and efforts others put in to whatever activities they partake in. I doubt you will find a better dating life outside of some of the more elitist and pretentious universities, which I feel MIT is not.</p>
<p>All he was trying to say was that he comes from a not-so-intelligent community by presenting an example (ie SAT scores). He was not implying or stating that he judges girls or intelligence based on SAT scores; rather, he was just making the point that he does not come from a very strong intellectual community thus not fitting in. Seriously…he has attempted to explain himself a few times…give him a break.</p>
<p>974088, relax. He already stated that he’s not judging people on their academic success. You say that you get along very well in your diverse community. Well done, do you want a medal?</p>
<p>QuantumArbiter wanted some advice and you’re going off on a tangent about people’s intelligence. He’s made it clear that what he intended to say is that he’s better off socially with smarter people, and to a degree the SAT measures smartness (hence the correlation between university “rank” and average SAT score). He was providing evidence to back up his claim. End of story.</p>
<p>Your social life will improve in college because students - hopefully- develop a more mature attitude toward relationships, more self-confidence, and (as already suggested) more opportunity. In addition, in Boston and Cambridge, the experience is improved by the proximity of so many colleges and peers. My son was a quiet, studious sort in high school, who had only a few nerdy and marching band friends. Now a sophomore, he has a girlfriend (older) from another neighboring school, a much more diverse group of friends and acquaintances, and a remarkable degree of improved self-confidence. This can happen to you too.</p>
<p>I agree with cicero and Sci-Fry. It’s obvious that QuantumArbiter, after repeatedly elaborating his question, did not mean to imply any elitism - intellectual or what not. He was simply trying to explain how he would prefer a more <em>intelligent</em>(=academically challenging) environment than that of his high school. Maybe this has been misinterpreted as arrogance, but frankly I feel that his concern about the college environment is justified. Dating prospects can be influenced to some extent by this environment (not saying that girls can be evaluated by SAT scores, but that they may be have different interests/hobbies etc.) </p>
<p>I am not implying that SATs or academic achievements in any way determine the real intelligence/personality/value etc. of a person. This is just my own 2c in interpreting QuantumArbiter’s post.</p>
<p>OK, this is kind of amusing. The poor guy mentioned a little fact about SAT scores that is quite extreme, and frankly while the SAT is kind of idiotic, there’s some degree of correlation between the scores and academic-mindedness, barring several (but not all-pervasive) exceptions. I would guess part of his concern is that there aren’t enough like-minded people at his school, and that while there may be many more at MIT, whether the social scene is likely to have improved in any case.</p>
<p>I think the best, succinct answer that’s been given is that probably people in a college (and at that especially at a good school) probably will have matured over some years.</p>
<p>The most disappointing part of the MIT dating scene are the guys - a lot of them are almost painfully immature and arrogant. Guess you’ll fit right in!</p>
<p>To actually try to answer the original question, yes I found the dating scene better at MIT than I did in HS. Though that was not simply because of parental absence, the lubricating effects of alcohol, or the overnerd need for human touch (whatever the heck that means).</p>
<p>I found it better because I grew up a lot there. I started to work out who I really was, and became much more comfortable with myself, which had a number of effects not least of which it made me simultaneously more relaxed and more attractive. For what it is worth, my longest relationship while at MIT was with a young woman who went to Boston University who I met at a party and just clicked with. She was quite smart but somehow, SAT scores never came up in conversation (grin).</p>
<p>Yahh thanks guys. I shouldn’t have mentioned anything about the SAT (*sighs) @Karen: Yes! Finally, a match between MIT and me. I’m definitely getting in ;]</p>
<p>Anyways, I felt the need to revive this thread for one more thing…</p>
<p>Is there time for dating and what not in MIT? My MIT acquaintances insinuate that the schedules are pretty tight with all the workload; they barely have time to sleep.
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Please tell me romantic dinners last more than 5 minutes.</p>
<p>Yes, there’s definitely time for dating, but you kind of have to work for it. A friend of mine recently remarked to me on how common long-term relationships are here; people just don’t have time to deal with the drama of relationship problems, and somehow it just kind of keeps them at bay. However, both you and your potential girlfriend WILL be stressed and busy often, and you just have to find a system that works for you. I’ve been with my boyfriend basically since I arrived at MIT (I’m a sophomore now; he’s a year older), and what works for us is (and I know it sounds lame) psetting together. I do my homework in his room, and we tend to cook or get dinner together just about every night. On the weekends, we’ll try to go into Boston or to Harvard and either get a nice dinner or see a play or a movie or just walk around or window shop, but a lot of times we don’t even have the time or energy for that. Sometimes our “dates” just include ordering delivery and watching a movie in his room. “Romantic dinners,” though not common, are enjoyable and savored, and definitely last more than 5 minutes.</p>
<p>Really, though, relationships are something that don’t just appear. It takes some work, and definitely some time management, to balance them with the intense academics/extracurriculars. If you do get one to work, though, I can personally attest to the fact that it decreases your stress level dramatically. It’s really nice to have someone to rely on to make you feel better, take care of you when you’re sick, get you dinner when you think you have no time to eat, and just generally make sure that you don’t fall apart. And it’s really nice being able to do that for someone else, too (even though it can get extra stressful when they get swine flu mid-semester). :)</p>
<p>@la montagne: Thanks so much for the details. You two sound like a cute couple And I’m really relieved most of the relationships in MIT are longterm…actually, my interviewer even assured me they were longterm! He met is wife undergrad sophomore year <3
I soo wish I get accepted. MIT sounds totally hott. LOL.</p>
<p>The semester I met him, I was in the middle of a heavy courseload semester, cheerleading competition season, and a bunch of important work at lab. I still had time for that early relationship stuff, basically because I didn’t sleep for a few weeks. (I tried to graph average hours of sleep vs. semester GPA once, and the semester I met my husband screwed everything up, because I got no sleep, but still got a good GPA.)</p>
<p>Mollie, you got no sleep and a good GPA because you are a superhuman laser-focused time management ninja genius. In other words, as amusing as it is that you took detailed sleep data for most/all of MIT, I don’t think the data is relevant. You are an outlier. =P</p>
<p>Munchybunch: McCormick is the only single-sex dorm (female), but floorcest (dating someone from your own floor) is strongly discouraged. This strong discouragement does apparently nothing to limit its occurrence, but seriously, keep it in mind. Dormcest (dating someone from your dorm but outside your floor) is not so bad, but still potentially problematic.</p>
<p>As for the actual subject of this thread, there is certainly an active dating scene at MIT. I know most people get nearly all of their information from the blogs, but in this case you need to keep in mind that most of us tried to keep the amount of personal information on the interwebs to a minimum. (And just to prove my first point from this post, Mollie has been an exception to literally everything I’ve said so far.)</p>
<p>Most MIT relationships are the long-term variety. People don’t really have the time or even the patience to mess around with a lot of dates with different people. Most social circles are less about going out clubbing all the time and more analogous to the “order a pizza and watch a movie” date.</p>
And I’m really relieved most of the relationships in MIT are longterm…actually, my interviewer even assured me they were longterm! He met is wife undergrad sophomore year <3
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