D’s school will set up a “signing ceremony” this week to honor D and her teammate who also committed to play their sport at a different D3 school. The teammate told D she might not even go due to financial reason but they didn’t tell the school nor the coach about this and agreed to show up at the ceremony. The family knew they weren’t able to go unless a good FA package provided but they have been telling everyone in school their D committed and would attend even the coach has put the announcement on the sport’s web page.
Coach had asked D if she was committed and going for sure before he announced it to the world. So obviously it matters to him or to the school…
As a D3 soccer parent, if the student was admitted ED as a recruit, and knows now that the actual financial aid package is insufficient, I think it is a incumbent on the family to let the college coach know promptly that the student cannot attend because of the financial aid package. The coach should know that he or she needs to fill that position. Enjoying the “glory” of the web page announcements and the signing celebration seems quite disingenuous if the family already knows the student has to back out of ED.
If it is regular decision, and the family will be waiting to see the final financial aid package before deciding, then presumably the coach knows this player is not truly “committed” since they didn’t go ED, and there is a risk they will choose to attend another school. The coach probably knows it is an “iffy” commit, and there is the risk of “drift.” If the player winds up going elsewhere because of finances, it might be awkward later, but totally permitted by the process.
@Midwestmomofboys I think I didn’t make it clear on my post. When I said coach, I meant the hs coach not the college one. She applied EA not ED so she can back out but they did share the glory of being announced as “one of our only two athletes who will play in college” D is the other one who got in ED and fully committed.
Look bad to who? There is not actually a signing or commitment for D3 (and if there were, it wouldn’t be in Feb, it would be in either November or April for most sports). Your daughter committed academically by going ED, but she really has no commitment to play, and by NCAA rules she could attend and play at another school next year if she wanted to.
I think the school should celebrate the other player as well. If the school cared about ‘looking bad’ it could wait to the have ‘signing ceremony’ until the other athlete was more sure of her situation. Most schools having signing ceremonies this week are only doing it for football, soccer, men’s water polo as other sports either signed in Nov or have to wait until April.
She is being honored because she was recruited to play. Should her accomplishment be ignored because she may not be able to afford the college that wants her? Maybe they are still hoping to be able to attend.
@twoinanddone Soccer NLI signing day is today.
There are several higher level players on the team didn’t tell the coach they were being offered because they are not sure if they could afford the school. They told D they feel being left out. We know the family pretty well because we play at the same club and they are known to always do this kind of stuff to make their daughter look better than she actually is. I am happy for her but just the family trying so hard to make other people drop their jaw from time to time…
The club belongs to one of their family members and they announce the news on their club website and putting D’s school and her school the same level in both academics and athletic level while one has 21% acceptance, most competitive D3 and the other is 75% and all others D3…
And I said football, soccer, and men’s waterpolo signing is today in post #3. Kchendds’ daughter plays volleyball, and there is no signing for D3 at all, so the school is just picking a day to have a mock signing. Why pick today? Wait and see what happens if there is a concern, although the hs and family don’t seem concerned.
DD’s school had a big ceremony for athletes in April, even for football and soccer. Most had either already signed in Nov. or Feb, or were going to schools that didn’t have NLI (D3, Jr. college, Navy). I’m sure some of those kids didn’t end up going to their schools. The school just wanted to recognize everyone. Of all the awards ceremonies my kids had in high school, including graduation, the NLI signing was the most inclusive,and by far the most fun. It was a truly happy time for everyone, and no one cared if someone was going D1 or to the community college team.
There will always be families that will “advertise” their kids, especially those in the position to do so publicly. But you truly sound like you are more concerned that your daughter isn’t getting the accolades that you think she should. Did you really expect them to print the college acceptance rates on the club announcement? In another thread, you were mad that the HS made a typo when listing the college your D got into, and now people might not realize how prestigious it is. I know you are proud of your daughter, and rightly so. So just be happy for her and let it go. If other players were recruited as well, they should have let the coach know so more could be included.
@calmom2016 I wasn’t mad about the typo for her school. I found it funny when the school tried to make it big but not right. I am totally fine with daughter not being advertised if that’s the school’s culture. If I really care about it, I would have pushed D to pursue Ivies or more well-known schools instead. Of course I am proud of my daughter and I would not mind telling people about it but definitely not when she wasn’t actually doing her job. It is more than what I have told here about what the family was trying to do and did make a lot of people unhappy. That part being left out made the whole post sounds sour.
I think I am more of feeling unfair for other kids and their families who are more realistic and humble about their achievement than anything about my daughter not getting the accolades.
OK, I get where you are coming from. We have the same scenario at our school with a particular family. They won’t change, you just have to let it go and realize most others see it for exactly what it is.
Or ask the high school athletic director to delay the signing ceremony and include all the athletes who are still thinking about where they will attend college. Maybe they’ll have another day in April when more of the athletes know where they are going?
DD’s school did have a much smaller signing ceremony in the fall, and the year my daughter signed (in the fall) there were 4 rowers who participated. DD and her friends deferred to the spring. The HS I graduated from has 50 or more athletes who go on to play in college, does a big ceremony in the fall, will do one today for football, soccer, and water polo, and another in the spring. Plenty of athletes to do 3 signing celebrations. A rival hs to my daughter’s has an individual ceremony for each athlete, and just schedules them from Nov to April. My DD went to a few of her friends’ individual parties, and even to a few of her ‘frenamies’ (one who is a current college teammate, who committed to the college before my daughter and which made my daughter green with envy that she wasn’t first to commit; still went to celebrate with her teammate).
There are lots of ways to celebrate. I think you should encourage the teammates who aren’t committed yet to celebrate if they do commit, even if it is only cupcakes with the team. It is a big deal and should be celebrated…
Let it go. Just … let it go. If you want to work for something, push for recognizing all the athletes who may or may not be able to go to colleges where they could play rather than worrying about one. I fail to understand the issue here.
I agree. Whether the recruit can afford to go to the school she was recruited to play at seems like a private matter to me. Not sure why it’s anyone else’s business. Nor do I think it important for the school or club, etc, to publicize the selectivity levels of the colleges to which these recruits are going.