<p>1 is that my husband and I do it all now and my daughter spends all her time with only me or him. We have no babysitter and no granparents around to help us. We dont have any friends here either that would help us. So we do it, and we do it all , and my daughter is not suffering with little attention, she is with me literally 24 /7 except twice a week from 6am-noon when she is with daddy. She VERY is well taken care of.</p>
<p>I take 6 units at school, and i take care of my daughter. My husband works full time, works every other weekend on another job, goes to law school at night, and goes for one class weekly for his second bachelor degree in nursing. </p>
<p>So please dont tell me i have entitlment issues and what not, we work our arse off for what we are trying to do. </p>
<p>I am 24, my mom is 55, i am her second child and youngest. I have been financially independant since i was about 17. And i can not ask my mom and only parent for a loan because my mom is on SSI due to cancer. </p>
<p>I am not a freshman, i have over 120 semester credits already. I did all my GE courses in community colleges with 0 loans and some courses at UCLA too. I had one major at UCLA and a another at Stony brook. I have 6 classes left at UCLA and about 8 here to complete the AMS degree. </p>
<p>And yes, i do plan on growing my children and travelling and doing whatever I want when i am older, because i am willing to work for it, and no i dont think it is a pipe dream . Sorry but it is not worth it if in the end you get a big fat nothing. If our combined debt between my husband and myself will be 150k for school loans, there is no way that for a normal couple making an acturial salary and attorney salary in nYC that it would take more than 10 years to pay off. Unless we decide to be idiots and buy bran new cars and a 5 bedroom house instead, but that is not our plan. We will continue driving the Honda civic until it breaks down. Also, if i went and got a job now i would make about 35-40k anyways, so with a degree i should make substantially more- if at least 1/2 of my salary goes to our school loans i think we can pay that off rather quickly. A lot of people buy a lot of stuff when they get employed, we are not those people.</p>
<p>One does not need to live a life of luxury to rack up the bills in NYC. Are you planning to send your children to public schools? You won’t find many lawyers or actuaries who do. So from school age on you’ll most probably be spending $30K plus per child just for school while also saving for college and paying your school loans. Then child care or nannies if you both work full time for, oh, 17 years.</p>
<p>And a decent, modest apartment, transportation, even just the weekly dinner out with friends, the breaks you’ll need working those jobs, summer activities for your kids, outrageous food prices and everything prices–NYC has a way of eating up big salaries.</p>
<p>I don’t know about the school system in NYC but I go to a public school and can honestly attest that I get a great education. Many of my teachers have masters and have been teaching for years, so I don’t think private school is a neccessity. </p>
<p>Hmom5, I may be mistaken but aren’t there cheap parts of NYC, they might not be the nicest but a budget is a budget? Right?</p>
<p>There are cheaper parts of NYC, but no part is cheap as you would think of cheap in Texas. You would need about 3 times the income in NYC that you’d need for an equal life in Texas. So if you look at a lawyer and actuary, who will together make say $240K during their early years if they get top NYC jobs in their field, they will live like folks making $80K in Houston.</p>
<p>We dont live in Manhattan even now and dont plan on doing so. We will live in Suffolk, which can be really affordable… we dont plan on even living here by the time our kids are going to start primary school. </p>
<p>We live here now b/c of school. California, Virginia, Conn, Upstate NY are all options for us. </p>
<p>And we dont believe in child care- we believe in granparents. I am from a different cultural background- childcare is totally not appropriate or desired if the grandparents are alive. Hopefully by the end of this summer his mom will move here, no one better to care for the kids and teach them Russian.</p>
<p>It is your own business how you live your life, raise your kids, juggle all of this as you go to school. Having gone through the baby years, myself, without grandparents or other family around to give childcare, I know how things are with you. We scraped by those years having to get outside baby sitters while I worked part time. If I wanted to continue schooling, those were not the optimum years to do so. The little ones really need a lot of attention when they are babies and preschoolers. It does get somewhat easier as they get older. </p>
<p>I worked part time those years, took some actuarial exams on my own, and stayed home otherwise. Yes, we had childcare, but on a part time basis. The extra I made working allowed to live in a much nicer, safer neighborhood, and not be on the brink of living from paycheck to paycheck. It gave us some leeway in case of an emergency. </p>
<p>When you get your NY residency, you’ll find the SUNY tuitions are affordable. Hopefully your MIL will be here so that you are freed a bit to work and go to school, if that is what you want to do. Good luck to you in juggling all of this.</p>
<p>right after you get done helping them pay for their education, right?</p>
<p>btw, besides the expense of it, childcare for 2-5 year olds can be a GOOD thing. My son was in full time day care from the time he was 16 months old until he started school. I could not have offered him the same level of interaction with other people that he got a day care. He could read when he was 4.</p>
<p>Not every kid and parent are happy home by themselves. My son LOVED his day care.</p>
<p>Agreed. Don’t be so quick to knock day care. I’m 18 and I still talk to my old day caregiver at least once a month and go see her at least 5 or 6 times a year, even though I live a distance away. If you can find somebody that works out of his/her, it is better and cheaper.</p>
<p>I don’t think it’s fair to compare European universities to American ones. I believe a much higher percentage of Americans go to university. However, I do agree that prices here are insane.</p>
<p>wow, this thread got really off-topic. may i bring it back in? can we discuss advice given to the original op whose parents filed for bankruptcy, to have them get a loan? Anyone else have a problem with this one? Perchance thats why the country is in a hole it is now?</p>
<p>Agreed with the last poster…the OP needs to figure out an affordable way to go to college. If the parents have filed for bankruptcy protection, they need to get their finances in order. I know this is not fun for the OP…but sadly others are in the same boat…needing to change their plans because of finances. Cpt gave some great suggestions on saving money. But this just may be one of those instances when a less expensive option needs to be at least considered.</p>
<p>And I don’t recall that the OP suggested that her parents should take out loans. I’m not sure they would be able to if they have just filed for bankruptcy anyway.</p>
<p>I had to go back and check the original post. Not sure the OP is reading the thread any more. But I agree - no way should the parents be trying to borrow any more and very unlikely they would be able to. Sounds like the OP is going to have to cut his suit to fit his cloth as the old saying goes, and find a more affordable education option. </p>
<p>And perhaps look at the awful situation his parents are in because of debt and learn from it and try and avoid it for him/herself.</p>
<p>The OP should let their parents get turned down for a PLUS loan and then they could get more unsubsidized stafford loans. NOBODY is going to loan alot of money to a student with no cosigner and if they did get a private loan there is probably going to be a HUGE interest rate.</p>
<p>EFCs really need to be looked at in the context of where you live. It’s like basing your grades off of only your weighted gpa, without looking at the situation at your school.</p>
<p>If you look at my parent’s combined income, noting that they are divorced, you would think we would be living in a large house with luxury, but instead, if one were to look at my house, he/she would think that our income is in the $40-50k area. Let me tell you, it’s a blast getting no financial help at all when my family’s lifestyle is probably equal to a $30k income family in Mississippi.</p>
<p>its a HER and i am regretful for ever starting this tread because i don’t need to have fingers pointed at my parents trying to say how horrible they are or whatever because of their debt. mind your own business, worry about your own problems, and never ASS U ME what others problems mean. yes, i asked for help, but that’s just it, HELP/ADVICE, not criticism and horrible judgmental comments.</p>