<p>For the app essay I'm working on right now, I have:</p>
<p>1) mostly contractions
2) the use of second person; "It's one thing to love something you're good at..."
3) Cliches; "short end of the stick"
4) Sentences starting with "But" and "And" (not too many).
5) A question; "Why didn't I quit?"</p>
<p>This is the first essay I've done, and I'm very unacquainted with the general "rules" for college essays. All I know is that I definitely don't sound pretentious in this one. The biggest word I use is probably "regurgitate."</p>
<p>So which of those five "informalities" is a bad idea? And which can I get away with?</p>
<p>1, 2, 4 and even 5 are okay to an extent. </p>
<p>3 is an absolute no-no. I'm sure some people get away with them, but you really ought to avoid them at all costs. Don't reduce your life to a cliche! </p>
<p>The main point of the essay is to convey a sense of /you/ to the admissions committee. If you use contractions, if you'd like to relate to the reader in second person, speaking in incomplete sentences and ask rhetorical questions (one of my essay books even has an essay written almost entirely in rhetorical questions), or even if you really like to speak in cliches, go ahead and show the readers that's what you do.</p>
<p>Use specific details, stay close to the topic, and don't rehash what you've said in the application so far (ie, don't say you've gotten X.X GPA and XXXX SAT) -- those are the only steadfast "rules."</p>
<p>Thank you. About the essay being about "me," well I don't know....it's weird. It's about something (soccer) that I absolutely love but pretty much suck at. I could have easily written about the clarinet and how much I love it and all of my musical achievements and how music has defined "me" but I chose to write about something that has not defined my personality, but rather has taught me perseverance among other things, and the ability to accept being considered subpar and to strive to achieve...parness(?) (don't worry I didn't say that in my actual essay). It focuses on my commitment and dedication.</p>
<p>Is it a super-bad idea to point out my "flaws" like that? Should I just stick with talking about the clarinet?</p>
<p>I have seen some very good examples of students who pointed out how they kept at something despite being terrible at it. These kinds of essays do work, so no worries there! The only thing is that they are a difficult balancing act. You have to make sure that you're not pointing out your flaws so much as highlighting a side of yourself they might not see simply by looking at your file.</p>
<p>It may be a risk to go with this topic, but it will work so much better if you pull it off than if you went with a "safe" topic like how good a musician you are. In the end, though, it's true, if unhelpful, that you could pull either one off equally well. It's not so much the topic you choose and the method in which you write it. "You" has flaws just as much as it has great talents, so if you choose to highlight the "you" with flaws and spin it in a positive light (as you are, in using the essay to highlight your perserverance, commitment and dedication), well, then the admissions committee still gets a chance to see YOU.</p>
<p>That makes me feel 10x better :D</p>
<p>Glad I could help. :) Best of luck!</p>