<p>You are so right, emeraldkity4. Although I am basically stuck right now, I know that if I didn’t get caught the second time, I would’ve tried it again, and again, and so forth. I need to get my life on the right path and although this was possibly the worst way academically, I have learned my lesson in full. I really am hoping that my CC will accept me and I can get back on my feet after this. That is all I am praying for at the moment.</p>
<p>I hope your room and board is cancelled. Otherwise, I don’t know what you could be charged with.</p>
<p>Your school must have given you a letter stating under what conditions you might be able to attend again. There must still be a chance to go back, right, or they would have expelled you now. I think doing some sort of service work to show character and a desire to grow in a moral sense, might help. Have they told you to work full-time or volunteer or anything?</p>
<p>Community college might not be worthwhile since it is a two year program and you have already done two years at your college. Unless you want to switch directions and do a vocational program of some sort, which can land you a job in, say, allied health, an office, as an auto appraiser, real estate, fire science etc. If you feel as if some community college classes in areas you need to study at your 4 year college might increase your confidence and skill level, so that you can truly avoid cheating, then they might be worthwhile, but your college may or may not accept the credits, depending on the courses you take and have taken.</p>
<p>Check with your current school to see if they take credits from other schools while you are out. You can still make progress by, say, taking online classes at another school or attending classes at an extension or adult learner program. State universities often have both online and extension programs.</p>
<p>There are internships available for people who are not enrolled in college, though many are indeed geared to students. Check craigslist for instance. But you can also volunteer, and volunteer opportunities are available to everyone if you pass whatever screening they might have. How about a hospital?</p>
<p>Above all, this is not the end of your life. If you are feeling that way, PLEASE please see a counselor who can support you while you face your parents, your school’s committee, and yourself. This will become a distant memory at some point, believe me. It will be alright.</p>
<p>Ted Kennedy got caught cheating in college and had to leave, and of course he had some other morally questionable experiences. However, regardless of politics, he went on to contribute a lot in public life. Redemption is possible for everyone. I think you should try to do something that can restore your feeling that you are a good person, for yourself as much as anyone else. Good luck.</p>
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<p>The only way? When will you express how sorry you are to your parent?</p>
<p>You raise valid points, compmom. The first letter I got was notifying me of my suspension, stating that I wouldn’t be able to register before Fall 2014. The latest letter which I just received, detailing my second offense, states they have to convene again and discuss what the ultimate outcome will be. Neither of which state in what way I can go back, besides the suspension letter saying I can’t register before Fall 2014, which I assumed meant I may have a chance of getting back. But now with a second offense, I am pretty sure that is grounds for expulsion. I am also currently on break now, and spring semester for my school doesn’t start until the end of the month so I can only reach the offices by phone or email. They haven’t told me anything as of yet, I guess because the first time was suspension, and they have decided the outcome for a second offense.</p>
<p>And that is true about the community college. I didn’t think that I might have too many credits to even be granted acceptance, besides this on my record. There are also 4 year schools in the area, but I assume those would be harder than community so I ruled them out. They are still accepting direct admission as well, however, so I will try them too. And they do take credit still even if suspended, but I am not sure now what will happen because I will almost certainly be expelled. I wouldn’t mind volunteering at all, I really need something to gear my mind towards good deeds. Thank you for your words. Creating this thread has really made me realize although it is a block I caused my self, there are still ways to try and get through it.</p>
<p>And ADad, I notified my parent of the suspension. I just received notice of the second act and haven’t built up enough courage to tell them back to back. When I stated the only way, I apologize if it seemed as if I meant it literally. I meant it as I have no one really to show me what direction to go in right now, after messing up so much. Sorry for the confusion there.</p>
<p>The community college will take your credits and if you can benefit from going there and getting an associates, that’s great. I didn’t mean to imply that it wouldn’t be useful, and now I understand your situation a little more.</p>
<p>I do think that you need to address the core of your problem. People cheat for a reason, beyond moral distinctions. You must be insecure about your academics, and boosting your confidence by taking some foundational classes, perhaps, or making sure you are in an environment that is not stressful (like community college) might help.</p>
<p>It’s important to be ethical, but it is also important to be doing things you feel able to do, in a supportive place, without the questionable crutch of cheating.</p>
<p>You raise great points again, compmom. I will try and wait to see what my current university says, although being suspended right now, makes me believe I won’t be able to get a hearing for the second offense until Fall of 2014. If so, so much time would’ve passed without me being involved in school and I can’t bare that. School is still my number one priority which is why I am still yearning to try and apply to CC and get on the right path. And yes I was actually insecure about failing both of the courses I was taking and making my GPA drop below a 3.0, which it is/was at before doing these acts. I understand how foolish that is, and like someone stated earlier it would have been so much better to just take the D or so I would have received for failing an exam instead of cheating to maintain a B. I really don’t know what I was thinking the second time I did it, my nerves and anxiety really got to me and I blanked, and I literally copied right at the last minute. Looking back at it I regret making that horrible decision so much, especially after remembering what had just happened over the summer. I really hope whether or not I am given a second chance at my institution, which I am embarrassed to even step foot again, but in life in general. I really am not a bad kid, I just made horrible decisions that cost me so much.</p>
<p>During this break, you could ask the college admins involved how the offenses will be noted in your record. A note on your official transcript? A record kept with your adviser? When you apply to a new school, the transfer student app usually asks for confirmation of a “disciplinary record.” It would be important for you to have the facts, so the future doesn’t feel so nebulous. I’m sure you’ll continue to express your deep remorse and commitment to never cheat again. </p>
<p>I think from the POV of college faculty and admins, academic dishonesty is one of the “worst” things a student can do, especially beyond freshman year. However, you should ask them how you could ever restore yourself and return to the school to complete your degree. Perhaps after a few semesters at a community college with no offenses? </p>
<p>I so glad the advice that’s been shared with you offers hope for your future. Learn from this and move on and thrive.</p>
<p>I really am so appreciative of all the feedback and help I am receiving. I will be sure to ask them how this will show up on my record and if there would be anyway of readmittance, after a few semesters at a CC with absolutely no offenses.</p>
<p>I think you should sit out this spring semester and get a job. Save as much money as possible to pay for your tuition at another school in the fall. You are probably done at your current college. The expulsion will be on your transcript.</p>
<p>That is also a option, because I know it will definitely be put on my record and I will be expelled. It’s just that it already feels so weird and deterring knowing that I won’t be attending college this upcoming semester at my current school. I feel as if a job is also necessary at this point, but that I need to be in school more than ever because of the point I am at. I know I might be thinking too hastily, given my circumstances, however.</p>
<p>I wonder if it would be worth your while to write to your advisor (school) to apologize for your behavior. Be sincere, don’t feel entitled that they owe you anything, let them know you would like to go back to your school, but would understand if it is not possible. It wouldn’t hurt to let them know how much you’ve enjoyed your experience there. </p>
<p>If they tell you that you’ll be expelled, then write back to tell them your plan on how you are going to move forward with your life (it may include getting a job, going to local CC, or even go into therapy), and ask them how the expulsion will appear on your record. As stated by someone upstream, how you handle this situation (how sorry you are) may influence your school’s decision. You are kind of at their mercy.</p>
<p>I also think you need to figure out why you cheat. You obviously know it is wrong, so why do you keep on doing the wrong thing which is harmful to you.</p>
<p>Again, I think that cheating is a sign that you were somehow over your head at that school. I don’t know if moving to an easier and/or more supportive school will help, or taking classes that are remedial or foundational, or if you need to rethink your goals entirely. College isn’t the only path. If you are so insecure that you need to cheat, then you need to be in an an environment, whether for work or school, where you can confidently stand on your own without cheating to shore you up.</p>
<p>I don’t know what pressures might be on you economically, or from family, or from yourself for that matter, but getting your family on board in terms of understanding the pressures you felt at your college is important. In other words, try to help them understand the feelings of insecurity that were behind your cheating, and ask them how to help you find a better path that will make it easier to stay on the straight and narrow.</p>
<p>Print your original post out and give it to your parents. They only want to help you.
Don’t make a third mistake and keep this from them…they may have ideas that can help if nothing else they can support you.</p>
<p>I am troubled by your characterization of your cheating as a “mistake.” It wasn’t a mistake. It was a deliberate choice to do wrong. Being under pressure is an explanation, but it’s not an excuse, as you knew very well what you were doing was wrong, and there were plenty of other students in the same circumstances who did not choose to cheat.</p>
<p>As a parent, I would be far more devastated by this character issue than by an expulsion. Before you can even begin thinking about your future, you need to figure out who you are right now and why you make such choices. You should work with a therapist to help you learn to cope with pressure in a healthier way. You have a lot of time to sort out your future, but unless you get to the root of this problem, you’re likely to make the same bad choice again.</p>
<p>Thank you once again for the responses. I think I really do need to sit down and figure out why I continued to do something I knew was wrong, especially twice. There are absolutely no excuses to condone my wrongdoing, ESPECIALLY because I did it twice, and trust me I am fully aware of this. This is also why I am not blaming the school for anything, undermining what consequences I may face, etc. I know this is completely my fault, and I deserve whatever punishment is given to me. The main reason I did both of them were at risk of losing the passing grade I had currently, and these were the only two classes I only actually ending up failing because of cheating. You don’t know how much I regret not just earning the grade I deserved and not being in this predicament in the first place.</p>
<p>And printing this thread, would actually be a good way of explaining to my parent. Thank you for that suggestion. Seeing everyone’s feedback here, as well on what to do next, will definitely help.</p>
<p>You cheated in order to survive, not to excel, which is an important distinction.</p>
<p>This means you were probably not in a good environment for you in the first place: you were struggling. Not only do you have to consider the character issue, but if I were you, I would reconsider my entire path. Survival should not be an issue, and at your current college, and maybe even at any college right now, it was.</p>
<p>That is also very true. I believe that it also might’ve been from how I was emotionally feeling at my current school. To be honest I wasn’t exactly happy there, but since I only had a year and half left I wanted to stick through and just finish. I still definitely want to major in what I was doing and continue in school, however. Maybe I do need to just sit down and discuss this with a therapist, which my parent suggested, but I didn’t technically agree to it.</p>
<p>After hearing that I have committed it twice however, they will most likely definitely enforce it.</p>
<p>In addition to asking for forgiveness, figure out how to forgive yourself. There will be many up and down moments related to this event in your life. Know that we all make mistakes big and small. If you are truly sorry and can turn from this, forgive yourself.</p>
<p>What can you DO now? Start with a letter to each professor. A simple apology. What you did was disrespectful. Don’t explain(this often sounds as an excuse) or ask for leniency, just say you are sorry. How can you make ammends? Think about paying what you have learned forward.</p>
<p>Don’t try to talk to your school by yourself. They will only want to hear from you, but maintain advisors. Talk to you HS guidance counselor or a favorite teacher.</p>
<p>Consider what you can do to change your ways, as well as have a positive impact on others. Are there struggling students in your HS who would benefit by hearing your story. Choices have consequences, but you are constantly rewriting your own story. Where do you want it to go from here. Whether your future lies at another college, your current college or elsewhere, your deeds matter as much as your words.</p>
<p>A therapist is a good idea.</p>
<p>@imessedupsomuch hey, what happened? did you transfer? did you end up getting a job? Please advise. I am in a similar predicament that you were and I am most likely going to be expelled. </p>