<p>Wow. What a rough spot to be in. Please tell GF that she deserves better than Dad is providing. </p>
<p>I suspect that Dad makes some significant money that he enjoys spending on himself and is terrified that turning over tax info is going to cause him to spend some on D. What a rotter he is!</p>
<p>So, the path forward is to conquer details. Good for you that you already understand many – you are way ahead of many of the people who come to CC. </p>
<p>Here’s my suggestions for a path forward:
- GF should take what information she has (her own tax forms, her mother’s if her mom is agreeable) and schedule an appointment with the financial aid office of the college that she wants to attend. Financial aid officers have some flexibility on these matters – but they will be a bit stiff – after all, nearly everyone says they are “broke” and it is the job of the fin aid officer to sort out who is truly broke and who just thinks they are. </p>
<p>Actually GF should go with a whole notebook of nicely laid out details – including </p>
<p>1) list of dates and where she lived
2) copy of her high school transcript
3) copy of her SAT scores (if she hasn’t taken this, she should get a study guide, prepare and take the exam as soon as possible).
4) letters of reference from any employers or mentors. </p>
<p>My point being, she wants to walk into the fin aid office looking like she is organized and mature (two key indicators that one is ready for college. </p>
<p>So she sits down and goes over the material with the staff member. They will advise her.</p>
<p>2) She should do all this all over again with at least one other college or community college (she may get different answers different places). </p>
<p>3) If she gets a “no aid” for an answer, then she should see if there’s any way that she can enroll in a single course as a parttime student. This means you have to finance the whole bill yourself, but a start is a start – and sometimes the cost of one course is bearable. (We’ll call this the “tip toe forward” path). She’ll do the best she can in this one course and then ask the professor for a letter of reference to go in her notebook for the next time she goes to financial aid. – and, yeah, she’ll do the whole “meet with financial aid” EVERY semester until they know her, know her story and know how serious she is about getting this education. </p>
<p>What you are trying to do is to get the college staff to say “Ok, let’s use mom’s info.” At that point she is in the clear and she can proceed forward with her head held high. </p>
<p>If Dad is adamant that he will not provide tax information, it might help if you can get him to document his refusal in a letter. Tell Dad that you “hear” him that he is not releasing tax information – but a letter from him to the college saying that he refuses to participate might allow D to use Mother’s information. (This is a long shot but worth a try). </p>
<p>What I don’t want GF to do is to get sucked into a for-profit online college that processes big loans for her but then dumps her into impossible on-line classes (some of the on line schools are infamous for this – you can’t pass the course and you can’t get out from under the loan). </p>
<p>I’d also encourage GF to look into Americorps and see if there is anything there for her. </p>
<p>Meanwhile, you are a peach to support her pursuit of education. She’s worth it – and being educated is worth it – if you can find your ways through the minefields of loans, bills and stupid courses to the Pell grants, scholarships, and life changing classes. </p>
<p>Good luck.</p>