Financial Aid and Remarriage

There’s plenty that isn’t fair. FAFSA doesn’t care that one adult child is paying for private duty nursing for a parent with dementia while the other siblings are not… so that one family is essentially subsidizing the nieces and nephews college educations. FAFSA doesn’t care that one parent bikes to work-- and gets free lunches and concierge services from his/her employer, and the parent down the block with the same salary spends $400 a month in commuting costs and gets no benefits besides a high deductible health care plan and 100K in term life insurance with a 50K kicker if he/she dies at work. The college’s net price calculators don’t care that one family has a Picasso lithograph hanging in the dining room which could be sold- tomorrow- for $100K, while their neighbor with the same income, home equity, and investments has a macrame wall hanging in the same spot.

Where’s the OP?

One post and done?

I am wondering if money paid by Non-custodial parent to Custodial parent to cover college and living expenses of their children can be considered child support? Then it would be reflected on FAFSA.

@sensation723 it does change it if he doesn’t magically have an extra 13k laying around either and expected his child to qualify for that aid. Most don’t have that extra handy. His child, and he, are penalized by the remarriage financially.

Very few people realize this before a remarriage unless they have children already in college. It is upsetting. No one is saying that there aren’t lots of things that aren’t unfair, it just can be an large unexpected consequence to take in and I think empathy is called for and appropriate. At what should be a happy time it may well feel like a giant roadblock.

@eandesmom If the agreement was he pays for his kids and she pays for hers. I don’t see how a change in FAFSA changes that agreement. It can change if both people agree to it. I don’t see why she is on the hook to pay an extra $13,000 for his child but still have to foot the bill for her children alone. That doesn’t really seem fair to me. FAFSA rules are their rules. There is nothing you can do about that. But it’s not unreasonable for the OP to tell her husband that she can’t afford to pay an extra $13,000 per year and pay for her children college alone as well. Either he figures it out on his own or he helps pays for her children college.

Sometimes, one has to ask whether the overall financial picture is better for all parties with the marriage or without. The advantage gained by combining households and by having a larger net income might or might not outweigh the disadvantages in regards to college aid.

Posters (including myself!) often need an attitude readjustment when it comes to college financing. Inevitably there will be threads where a parent complains that their hard work in making enough money to pay is being penalized because they don’t get free aid. Others will point out that it’s easy to join the ranks of the poor. I don’t complain that I’m being penalized because I make enough money not to get food stamps.

“That said, any NCP should feel a moral obligation to help with college, even if info isn’t used for FA calculation.”

Lol. If only.

@eandesmom
I understand the frustration, but even if your newH isn’t paying anything for your kids’ college costs, he is paying for at least half of the household’s costs, isn’t he? I’m guessing that since your H’s income will affect aid, that he’s not low-income

If so, then the FAFSA calculation would not be right if only your income were listed. If would wrongly assume that about $25-30k of your income is paying for rent, utilities and food.

Likely, you and your newH are splitting costs…rent/mortgage, utilities, food, cell phone, etc. Before you were together, you were paying for those things alone. So, at least that savings can help you pay for college costs.

Obviously, second marriages handle finances in their own unique ways. Some split everything 50/50, while others do a proportional income split…

It’s smart to be looking at other options for your kids’ college. If their stats are strong, look for schools that give huge merit for their stats.

That said, if you’re stretched while contributing to your kids’ college costs for 4-8 years, are you saying that your H is going to let you starve and wear threadbare clothes? Lol. If he’s that type, then separate when college time comes around.

Thanks to threads like this one, I know I won’t be getting married anytime soon. I’m the CP for my child and the school is paying for most of the tuition and fees. I don’t agree that if you remarry the government should combine the incomes. At my age, both people usually have their own children to pay for.

FAFSA, the gov’t FA form, just qualifies you for a Pell Grant and a loan. Anything else comes from the college.

It’s up to them if they want to use FAFSA or a different form (like CSS Profile) which can use its own calculations and include NCP data.

I would have a lot more empathy if every divorced case that I know of didn’t involve the kids getting screwed by either or both of their bio parents.

I understand that there is a lot of stuff to negotiate and renegotiate with a second or third marriage. People have obligations to elderly parents; extended family; people need time to rebound financially from the hit of divorcing/legal fees/establishing multiple households. All of this is far more fraught when someone is figuring out financing as a middle aged person vs. “just starting out” (even though a lot of first time marriages are taking place with people who are on the verge of being middle age but whatever.)

But seriously- to all the blended families out there- do you honestly think as a matter of public policy that the government via tax policy or FAFSA/Pell or any other entitlement program should be making it MORE attractive to be divorced than to stay married? Should colleges be providing a financial incentive for people to divorce and to thereby get their kids MORE money in financial aid than they’d be getting with the same income/asset level in an intact family?

What are y’all suggesting when you claim that it’s unfair that two working adults who are married and have merged their households are now considered an economic unit? That it’s more lucrative to be married to your second spouse than your first via preferential financial aid policies, preferential FAFSA treatment?

Nobody likes being on the losing end of an arbitrary system. This I understand. But remarriage isn’t something that happens to you- like Hurricane Sandy or a tornado which wipes out your house. Remarriage is something you enter into- presumably after figuring out the upsides and the downsides. Which presumably includes some financial calculus.

What am I missing?

<<<<
don’t agree that if you remarry the government should combine the incomes.

My son will be going to MIT
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I don’t understand this statement. It’s not the gov’t that is combining incomes or giving aid in your case if your child is getting great aid from his/her school. It’s the SCHOOL. Any fed aid you’re getting would be tiny.

@sensation723 the difference is he will now be (potentially) paying 13k more per year for his child to go to school than he would have if he did not remarry. That is not an insubstantial amount of money. OP has her own children to put through school and does not have it to freely give. How is that not a very different scenario?

@blossom that’s a pretty gross generalization. The reality is that remarried parents are for college purposes considered part of two economic units at a profile school and either one or none at a FAFSA. There is no one magic formula to address every scenario. So a CP who is screwed by their NCP, who remarries and has a spouse who upholds their NCP (aka did not screw over the other bio parent) financial obligations so does not have “extra” for their stepchildren deserves no empathy? Of course the situation is what it is but I don’t understand the zero empathy. OP is asking the question, and in doing so is trying NOT to screw over her future H so is looking to understand the implications and is getting slammed for it. I don’t blame her for running away. She has to go tell her fiance that hey, if you marry me, it’s going to cost you an extra 52k in college expenses? Her children will now also qualify for less so their combined expenses have just increased far more than they will save merging households.

Do you really think most people, knowing that so many don’t even understand how much college costs at all, what an EFC even is, how typically unaffordable that number is for many people, really have the financial savvy to consider what remarriage does to their child’s potential to qualify for aid or really expect the new spouse to pay their share when they have their own kids to cover? Yes, people should be informed. They should do their own research but this is not simple stuff easily available or something that most schools walk parents through and for most it is an unexpected shock at what should be a happy time.

I am not saying that the new couple should not be considered an economic unit, they are. Where I personally take issue is the fact that the non custodial children’s college expenses cannot be considered as a factor in that unit. Our unit will have two children in college for 4 overlapping years. For only 2 of those will it be actually considered as having 2. That is a significant difference in determination of “need”.

@mom2collegekids there is a pretty significant difference between wearing threadbare clothes and shelling out 28K+ extra per year that he doesn’t have floating around or in the OP’s case 13k. That would also assume one had been able to save that much during the time of the remarriage, that neither partner had any economic impact due to job loss or health by your assumption of shared cost reductions. I have certainly not “saved” 100K+ on household expenses since I remarried, nor has my H.

For the OP, someone contemplating remarriage right before a child goes to college, or while in college? To assume 13k per year is magically saved and immediately available simply by combining households? Expenses are not cut in half due to remarriage. They may not be cut at all. They may actually go up depending on the needs of the larger unit. Taxes go up and individual incomes go down which may negate what is in fact saved.

I am not arguing the economic unit, however I do feel kids that parents are paying college expenses for should be considered as part of the unit. That may happen at a Profile school. It may not. In my situation no, at a FAFSA school it isn’t going to make a difference. At a profile school, meets full need/need aware it is substantial and could allow certain schools to be considered. I am not frustrated, it is what it is, I simply empathize with the OP.

@CCDD14 If college expenses are part of the parenting plan/divorce decree I believe you can claim them as child support. However I can tell you that it does not impact net numbers at all, whether included or not whereas if that child was considered at one in college, it does.

Since the FAFSA is evaluating household income, I do think it is fair that all the family income is considered. The new family, in most cases, is saving by not having two mortgages, two insurance premiums, cheaper car insurance.

fafsa has one formula. Would it be fair to not count the stepparent’s income if the couple had been married since the child was 4 years old? If the new stepparent makes $200k and pays for all the family’s living expenses and the bio parent only makes $25K but only has to pay for tuition so the student would qualify for a Pell grant? If the bio parent is having the noncustodial parent pay the tuition so she gets to keep the $25K she earns? There can’t be a formula for every situation.

My sister and her husband have two houses because he works about 2 hours away from their main home. It’s really a necessity, but they have to declare it as a second home. If they had the same situation (two houses, two kids) but weren’t married, it is very likely their children would qualify for Pell grants as my sister makes very little as a teacher. For many years they weren’t married and he claimed one child and she the other, he one house and she the other. They decided to marry and, tax wise, it was a big hit. Choices.

I don’t understand where the $13000 example is coming in. A Pell grant is $5800. What other federal aid, determined by FAFSA, is the student losing because of the marriage and having to include the stepparent’s income?

It’s unfortunate that your ex doesn’t pay, but that’s not the colleges’ fault. Why should they subsidize students because the NCP won’t pay? Your spouse, like OP, is apparently saying he can’t or won’t make up the difference between the net cost and what the natural parent(s) are willing or able to pay. It seems like the students will have to choose less expensive schools or hunt for merit aid. I don’t see how that’s the colleges’ fault.

The reality for most of us is that there are a lot of really great schools our kids can get into, but a much smaller list of what we can afford. These students need a smart application strategy. It’s important that everyone figures out how much they’re willing and able to spend on college and they’re up front with the children about it early in the process. If OP can’t afford $13k/year, s/he needs to say so.

@twoinanddone there is often state or institutional aid at FAFSA schools that might have been available. It may be the difference between subsidized or unsubsidized loans or qualifying for a Pell at all. At a profile school the 13k might have been fully covered as “need”. Many scenarios.

@austinmshauri

The net cost changes with the remarriage. FAFSA considers the CP. Not the NCP. It is only by virtue of the remarriage that a second income is considered and the EFC changes, sometimes significantly.

I am not suggesting that that schools subsidize for NCP’s who won’t (or in my case can’t) pay. However, I do think it fair that if they are going to consider the stepparents income, the stepparents children’s college expenses should equally be considered.

@eandesmom

Then have all of the kids live with the one parent…and then they are counted in the count of number on college.

I’m not saying that the whole thing is fair or not…but really…NO parents either step, or bio are required to pay college costs.

And I agree with @blossom. It seems like list of kids get the college tuition shaft when parents divorce.

BUT…I also know of more than a handful of situations where the step parent is quite well off. The new family is living a very nice life, and truthfully, it is their choice not to pay college costs…just like any other married or even unmarried couple.

Post #22 asks: I am wondering if money paid by Non-custodial parent to Custodial parent to cover college and living expenses of their children can be considered child support? Then it would be reflected on FAFSA.

Yes and no. It is reported on the FAFSA as income by the student or by the custodial parent, depending on the situation.

This is from the Federal Student Aid Handbook (yes, the FAFSA instructs the student to do this): The student reports any cash support he received, but if dependent he does not count his parents’ support, with one exception: money from a non-custodial parent that is not part of a legal child support agreement is untaxed income to the student. That is, in Year 2, the student will put the amount the NCP paid in Year 1 as untaxed income.

If it’s part of a legal child support agreement, the amount paid per the legal agreement is reported by the custodial parent in Year 2 as child support received in Year 1.

Many scenarios, and fafsa can’t cover them all so have one formula for family income.

Now if you want to talk unfair…why are single parents limited to 1/4 the asset allowance that a married couple gets (now maybe 1/2, since the formula cut down for married people too, but the single allowance didn’t gomup, the married allowance went down)? Why do parents who have 2 or 3 kids in school have the same income maximum for for the AOTC credit as those with 1, and singles only half of that of a married couple even if only one of the couple works? The guy at my office making exactly what I make gets many more tax deductions for his family of 3 (wife, one child) as I get (single, 2 kids). He gets to save more in retirement for the non-working spouse, doesn’t have to pay child care, etc, yet for my family of 3 I lose a lot of those deductions and I’ll pay two tuitions and he only one. He’ll get the AOTC for one while I can’t qualify on the same salary even though I pay tuition for 2.

Taxes aren’t fair. FAFSA doesn’t work out the same for everyone.