<p>My daughter is wrapping up her 1st semester, and isn't loving UM. She says the dominant culture at the school is affluence, and the dorms and campus aren't very conducive to casual socializing. I did go to Parents Weekend, and was stunned at how empty the campus seemed on the weekend (and I don't just mean before noon). Thoughts, comments? Would Greek life help? Is there any at Miami?</p>
<p>My son didn’t love UM for 2 1/2 years before he finally decided to transfer. It seems like most students go their own ways at UM on the weekends. There are so many different things to do that, while it’s nice to have so many options, it does disperse the students and there is not much campus cohesiveness. My son did try joining a fraternity. While the rushing was fun, he ultimately didn’t like Greek life very much. There is a good sized Greek presence on campus. Yes, the dominant culture is affluence, but even more importantly, it’s self absorption. I think that was what turned my son off after a while. He could find very few true friends. Most were superficial and out for only themselves. When push came to shove, he couldn’t count on more than just a couple of people and that just wasn’t enough for a fulfilling college experience.</p>
<p>She should try to get involved and join a few clubs, if she hasn’t already. We would love to have her join us with LINK, the volunteer organization on campus. The scuba club is an excellent way to have fun on weekends. RAK has weekly events, like Free Hugs on Fridays.</p>
<p>The campus is, certainly, relatively empty on weekends… but especially on Parent’s Weekend, when half of the people go home (because most of us are from Florida), and many of the rest stay at a hotel or are participating in activities with their parents. And, if you were there during the football game, that’s where everyone was.</p>
<p>As far as not being able to find decent people, I think that idea is highly overdone. Many people come to the school expecting that, so that’s all they see. In reality, there is every type of person here. If you want superficial friends, you can certainly find them. But there are just as many down-to-earth people to meet.</p>
<p>Son has joined clubs and kept busy with lots of activities on campus.
We are from OOS and he has never complained about an empty campus. It does not clear out on weekends.
Parent’s weekend was so much fun. We did things off campus. The football game was the plaice to be!
Son eventually rushed and pledged a frat. He still does plenty on his own, but has a built in social network or many fun activities and a place to hang out. I would suggest your daughter rush, which is likely early spring term.
Good luck and give it time.</p>
<p>Great and rapid responses! Yes, we went to the football game, which was a blast. But socially, it is a little strange compared to most campuses, where the stadium is just a few hops away. Having to get into a bus and drive for 30 mins…just a little non-college to me.re Greek life – yes, glad to hear that. She is committed to trying to get things going socially to give it a real shot (it’s only November, after all), and indicated she would be looking into that upon her return. I hope that offers some promise.
So thanks!</p>
<p>I also should add that my daughter hasn’t been sitting at home in her room. She was elected to the student senate, and joined whatever the organization is that shows movies on campus. So she does know how to dive in; the question is, is she going to be able to swim? :-)</p>
<p>My D is also a Freshmen. She has never been very social as she was always too busy doing homework, etc. She is now very busy socially and found a great group of down to earth friends (some who are very wealthy). She joined several clubs and goes to many of the free events on campus, out to dinner at local restaurants, as well as the movies and games. I also have never heard her complain about a lack of students on campus. In fact ,she stayed there for Thanksgiving and said how nice it was to have so few students around and to have things quiet for a change!</p>
<p>Greenmum, my son is also a first semester freshman. He claims to like it there a lot, but from what I gather, has little social life there as well. He hasn’t found friends to hang with, spends a lot of time by himself, and says the kids he’s met so far he has little in common with. He is optimistic, however, that it will get better with time, and thinks he’ll find his niche because there are a lot of students there. Like you, though, I can’t help but worry a little about it, even as a dad. Not exactly the experience I expected he would find after 4 months there.</p>
<p>Greenmum</p>
<p>Not uncommon, DS ran into many of the same things as he adjusted, his 1st Semester wasn’t the easiest. Sure there are affluent kids there, but as time goes on and she takes more classes and does more things, she might discover more things she likes. The same may hold true for goodday’s son…I experienced the same apprehension first hand two years ago.</p>
<p>Taking awhile to settle in and find your niche is not unique to UM. Our kids go through such a major life change when they go off to college, I think it’s more astounding when kids find their place quickly. Encourage your students to keep an open mind and to continue putting themselves out there and getting involved. Don’t close off any opportunities, you never know where you’ll find your people. My S did go Greek and it turned out to be a wonderful experience for him but there are many other paths to take. Volunteer organizations are usually very welcoming and fabulous ways to meet people. Please be patient, it takes time.</p>
<p>Yes, you are so right. This is actually my second child going off to college. First one was very smooth. Now I realize (and reflect back to my own experience) that isn’t necessarily the norm. I hope this turns out to be a matter of time and a little patience and effort. I should also mention my D’s roommate is not superhappy and talking transfer. They get along great. So i fear there may be some contagion!</p>
<p>i’m a 1st semester freshman and definitely feel the same as well. hopefully things will change</p>
<p>I suppose I should’ve mentioned that I am also a first semester Freshman, since that’s what this is about. Marg1, you should totally come out and volunteer with LINK, if you’re looking for some cool people to hang out with. This Friday we’re going to a nursing home, I believe. If you want more info add me on facebook. My name is Robert Rankin. You can also search for me in umail, and send me an e-mail. Also, on Fridays at Noon, a group called Solutions meets in the Lewis room in the Rat to talk about “intellectual topics,” meaning whatever you find interesting. Current news, sciences, other fun stuff.</p>
<p>Miami is not any different from other privates. Let’s face it, the cost is $50,000.00 a year!!!</p>
<p>Not many can afford it. Therefore you will find more rich people at expensive privates. This is not unique to Miami. There are also a lot of kids on scholarship. Lots of kids from around the world and all over the country. Just because someone has money does not mean they are not down to earth. </p>
<p>College is what you make of it. People just like you will not magically appear. You have to make some effort to seek them out. </p>
<p>Many freshmen have trouble adjusting. Check out this thread and see:</p>
<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/772372-how-your-freshman-adjusting.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/772372-how-your-freshman-adjusting.html</a></p>
<p>It has 336 posts and been viewed 32,008 times since the end of August.</p>
<p>Take it from someone who transferred into Miami and out of Miami. Due to extenuating circumstances, I was forced to leave the University of Maryland. My first semester of college was truly amazing, I had a great group of friends and UMD-CP was an awesome school. However for certain reasons I had to leave and enrolled at Miami for Spring semester. I’m from South Florida so knew very few students at the school and was highly frustrated after putting myself out there on my floor of McDonald Towers in Hecht Residential College. My parents told me to stick it out, it was my first semester and everyone had already had all of their friends from first semester. I concentrated on my academics and spent most of my weekends at home 50 minutes north of Miami. I wound up with a very high GPA at Miami. In my second semester, I went in being very optimistic about my future at Miami. I rushed fraternities, but all the ones that I checked out were not the right “fit” for me. I was back at ground zero, with very little of a social life. I decided that no one was coming to me and that I had to be more assertive and get more involved and that’s just what I did. I joined 4 or 5 clubs, got very involved with Jewish life, acquired three leadership positions. In turn, I met many great people and realized that there were plenty of nice kids at Miami, they were just not easily found, it took hard work. Still frustrated with social conditions (lack of on campus fun and near campus partying that did not cost a lot of $$$), I went into my third semester with as close as possible to a 4.0 GPA. I had a solid group of friends as well as many other acquaintances and amazing grades. That semester, I founded a fraternity at Miami with 32 other men who are my brothers to this day, probably the best moments of my life at Miami. Prior to finding the fraternity, I had sent transfer applications to few top universities and wound up getting into a few and chose to transfer to UNC-Chapel Hill, my ultimate dream school. It was a tough decision and I do not regret it.</p>
<p>However, I will say that freshmen as well as transfer transition takes longer for some people than others. My transfer experience here has been pleasantly smoother as I met a great group of friends and took on leadership positions. However, there is always one hurdle that gets in the way. The academics at UNC-Chapel Hill are way more advanced than the spoon-fed material that UM’s Business school rewards to its students and the grade deflation. I’ve been having a tough time adjusting to the Carolina way of academics but have been slowly finding my pace in academics. As I said earlier, I was Greek at Miami and I underestimated the transition of assimilating into the chapter at UNC. I met many nice brothers but I still do not feel the same genuine bonds that I felt with my initial brothers and fellow founding father. Nearly done with my first semester, I’ve felt that I gained a lot in terms of campus life, academic rigor, and college atmosphere, but I’m still stuck in the transition period for finding more of a social niche and adjusting fully to the rigorous academics and finding my place between the caliber of students that attend UNC.</p>
<p>With that being said, it is normal to have certain doubts after your first semester. It takes a good two semesters to fully adjust to each and every element of the university. If she still feels discomfort after two semesters, I would suggest looking at other universities, because Miami is probably not the right “fit” school for her.</p>
<p>Hope this helps.</p>
<p>Also, it is not surprising to meet quite a few kids who talk about “transferring”. From last year, I know quite a few of people who transferred out to top schools like Columbia, Cornell, Michigan, NYU, UVA, Emory, Vanderbilt and Washington U. Some students go into Miami with the attitude of getting a high GPA and transferring out to their first choice schools from senior year.</p>
<p>Thanks for your insights, Bruins. Interestingly, my D got into several of those colleges you mention, but Miami offered her such a great merit scholarship package that she felt it was a wise economic choice, especially if she wanted to pursue grad school. She is committed to going at least a full year, and I think/hope things will get better. And if not? Well, that’s okay too. We all find our way, in our own time.</p>
<p>Just wondering BruinsJEW - </p>
<p>How did you find the academics at Maryland? I know you weren’t there that long but I’m wondering how they compared to Miami. My son is considering a Business major and applied to both schools.</p>
<p>Academics at Maryland I felt were harder. Part of the reasoning has to due with the learning environment and resources that are available to the students. At Maryland, your lower level, introductory business courses as well as core classes that every student must take are all for the most part large, lecture hall courses. For ECON201 (Microeconomics), I had a 400 person lecture hall and I felt it very hard to learn the material at hand. There was no direct professor to student interaction. If you had problems, you had a TA, but the TAs were graduate students and for the most part, they were either incompetent on hard to understand. I did not feel as engaged in academics at Maryland, the student body was more focused on partying or maybe I was just stuck in the freshmen transition mode with everyone else. However, I have heard once you are admitted to Smith (usually after your second semester of sophomore year), the class sizes were 30-50 kids because it was more focused on your major and not a weeding out course.</p>
<p>Hope this helps. I felt like I learned a lot more at Miami because the way the material was taught and presented to me, it was easier to retain and understand the concepts.</p>
<p>That is one of the things my D loves about Miami the most. All her classes are taught by professors and are small. The professors are VERY accessable. I think this is a lot of the reason she did not take the guaranteed transfer to Cornell. When she did an overnight at Cornell, she also sat in on three classes. They were very large and the Professor or TA just walked in, did their thing at the front, and walked out. Very cold, gave the impression that if you did not get it, too bad, you can be easily replaced.</p>
<p>The fact that it is still 80 degrees and she is in her shorts and flip flops doesn’t hurt either ;)</p>
<p>SVMMom,</p>
<p>That’s exactly how I feel since I transferred to UNC. I thought the gamble of smaller classes for more of a college atmosphere and college town would be worth it, but right now I’m having doubts and considering transferring back to Miami. Our main priority in college is to get an education and come out with a degree, which as reflected in my grades here, has taken a turn. I find it hard to adjust to teaching myself material which I’m bad at from having a professor who cared about my understanding of the material. Here you are just a number, at Miami, you’re an individual and you’re teachers want to see you succeed. Here like you said, there attitude is you can just be replaced so they do not hesitate failing students.</p>
<p>I’m unsure as how much further I’ll go with a UNC degree when compared to a Miami one. And I do want to go to graduate business school for my MBA and my GPA is an important factor in that decision and the school that I will admit me, I’m unsure how a 3.0-3.2 GPA will look compared to a 3.9 from Miami.</p>