Free Advice

Prep School Admissions Prep School Parents
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You’re entitled to ignore or dispute the following.

My advice for parents:

  1. You only need one acceptance, to a school you can afford, to achieve the dream.

Even if you have that one “yes,” your child may receive multiple rejections. Focus on the positive.

  1. Celebrate every acceptance.

The school you thought was your child’s backup school may be his favorite. Every school which accepted your child turned down other children.

  1. Love the school which loves you.

Admissions officers are quite good at determining fit. If your child has an acceptance, try not to pine over the “one that got away.” If you must do so, that’s what long walks and bubble baths are for.

In the past, I have advanced the argument to treat every waitlist as a rejection; if you have other options, move on with those schools. My family has not regretted that approach.

  1. Success is in reach, no matter what.

Some children will not receive good news tomorrow. I have seen middle school friends of my children go on to be very happy and successful at their local public schools. Some have applied again the following year to private schools. Some have found a talent or a passion during high school that they never could have satisfied in boarding school.

  1. If your parents attended boarding schools, ask them to check out your child’s potential schools online. I know my father had no idea how many schools had changed since the 50s. (1950s)

  2. If you can, attend the revisit days for the schools you are seriously considering. If your child has been accepted to several schools, it’s fine to determine which schools you will revisit. If there’s a school you are certain your child won’t attend, let the school know, by postcard, letter, email or phone call.

  3. Don’t “double deposit.” You must choose one school by April 10th. There have been posters in previous years who claimed to have deposited at two schools. This is the best way to lose both schools. The schools can withdraw offers of admission for bad behavior. Double depositing qualifies. They do talk to each other after April 10th. (They may before–I don’t know the exact dates.)

  4. If you need a school, you can check SSAT’s “schools currently considering applicants.” http://www.ssat.org/admission/scca

  5. No matter what, congratulations on making it through this process. When you (the student) apply to college in a few years, you will find the process less intimidating than other students, because you’ve been through it already. You (the student) are a winner, no matter what, because you were willing to step outside your comfort zone.

  6. Once you’ve decided on a school, sent in the enrollment commitment, and notified every other school, it’s time to come back to look for packing lists. And everyone’s favorite, the threads about laundry.

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@Periwinkle, thank you for taking the time to write this post. I sure hope laundry will be our next big problem …

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Tremendous, sage advice, @Periwinkle.

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Very, very helpful. Love the school that loves you!

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If you are faced with only waitlists, April (around when deposits are due) is a time when many schools go to the waitlist. They may also take 1 or 2 in July when deposits are due. Watch the waitlist threads to see which schools are predicting they will go to their waitlists. It is true some schools won’t use their waitlists at all. Make sure your child - not the parent - notifies their schools that they are still interested in attending asap (but wait a few days) and he/she sends any meaningful updates to scores, ECs etc. It is ok for a parent to ask how many are on the waitlist and what chances are that your child may get a spot. Some schools will actually tell/hint if your child is a priority for them. Some schools keep huge waitlists and some waitlists are tiny.