<p>wow. my friend is going to oberlin. i can't wait to tell her about this.</p>
<p>i haven't been in a dorm with group showers, but as for gender neutral bathrooms, it really isn't a problem. as others have said, you vote anonymously at the beginning of the year. i was truthfully pretty worried at first, but everyone is mature and it's not an issue. you see the same people everywhere else in your hallway and talk to them, so it's not odd to find people of the opposite gender in your bathroom too.<br>
also someone asked about co-ops. there are a few different types at oberlin. some of them are dorms where students do all the cooking and cleaning. others just have cooking, and some are students who live in other dorms but come to that co-op dorm to eat. there is a main chef, and students have shifts each week to help prepare, clean, etc. it saves you a bunch of money to eat in one and it's probably healthier. some just have vegan or vegetarian food. i am not in one but i've i've tried food from a few and it's been good from my experience. different co-ops have different personalities and menus, so look into them more indepth if you want to live or eat in one.</p>
<p>There's nothing odd about a co-ed bathroom with co-ed showers. One of the dorms on campus here at Lawrence used for summer housing has a couple of co-ed floors where men and women share the bathroom and can be roomates if they want. I'm on one of those floors rooming with my girlfriend.</p>
<p>The very first day seeing women in the bathroom and walking in and out of the showers was kind of weird, but after 3 weeks it is completely normal to me.</p>
<p>The only reason people get "shocked" at co-ed shower rooms is because they are not used to it. Plain and simple.</p>
<p>id rather not become used to it though...</p>
<p>im cool with other ppl doing it but i wouldnt feel comfeterable showering with guys adn girls together</p>
<p>This is the first year that co-ed showers were used at my college. Because of an unexpected shortage of housing, a menâs dorm had to quickly be converted to a co-ed dorm. There is only one communal bathroom on each floor except for the second floor where there are two bathrooms, so the second floor bathrooms were kept as same-sex and the other bathrooms became co-ed. (Students who did not want to be in the co-ed dorm were allowed to move or they could use the second floor bathroom, which was not exactly convenient if you live on another floor.) The showers are totally communal and there is no privacy in the showers. Rules were posted and it was made very clear that there was to be nothing âintentionally sexualâ in the bathrooms. However, it was also made clear that erections were not something that guys could totally control.</p>
<p>The first couple of weeks, the showers were full of guys with erections (whenever there were girls there), but I never heard of any problems and I never heard of even a single complaint. Most of the guys tried to minimize their visibility when they were erect. By the end of the month, it was obvious that most of the guys had gotten over the co-ed shower thing and it was no big deal.</p>
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<p>Just to be clear: the above post has nothing to do with Oberlin.</p>
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<p>The OP said: âThis whole thing shocks me. For the amount of money the school charges, they canât convert these shower âroomsâ into individual stalls?? Iâm really not a prude, honestlyâŠBUT, I have never heard of this in ANY other college; and, Iâm not happy about it.â</p>
<p>OP: any additional questions? </p>
<p>Most showers at Oberlin are the traditional ones that you would like; there are a few that have curtains separating them instead of stalls; each dorm has the kind of shower facilities you like; and no one is required to take group showers :-)</p>
<p>Your child will be safe at Oberlin.</p>
<p>Kei</p>
<p>P.S. It was amusing that you thought it was a budget issue :-)</p>
<p>op is from 2005âŠthink someone just drumming up Obie-like barrier breaking shock by resurrecting this from the crypt of old posts.</p>
<p>Not to mention that in the last five years, the college has installed shower dividers in Burton and Fairchild. The only living space that still has group showers is Harkness, which
a) is a co-op, so no one ends up living there unless theyâve specifically requested it; and
b) would probably stage a protest if anyone tried to get rid of the group showers.</p>
<p>Not an issue.</p>
<p>What school was this? That is pretty amazing. I remember how shy I was at 18 or 19 and can imagine it would have been weird to shower nude in front of schoolmates of the opposite sex. Did most people just go along with it and just suck it up and shower naked in front of the opposite sex or did many people use the 2nd floor shower to avoid having to shower in front of someone of other sex? Were there any rules that girls could have privacy if they wanted or could anyone just walk in and join them in the shower without asking? I wonder if this will be a future trend, who knows.</p>
<p>â â â â . PLEASE LET THE LACK OF COMMENTS IN THE PAST FEW YEARS MEAN PARENTS HAVE FINALLY GROWN UP! I attended Oberlin in the 80s before transferring to its competitor in Iowa, which was an excellent move for me. I took Greyhound for about a day to get there because there was no way I was going to allow my mother to mortify me a second time. My father more than took care of that at graduation, anyway. Moms, parents . . . QUIT HOVERING. Go away. Your children are going to college. If they are interested in thoroughly researching it in advance, they will. If they arenât, they will figure it out when they need to. Let them fill out their own dorm request and preferences form. If you do it the first time, why would they take doing it before sophomore seriously? They are going to college to grow up. They wonât do that if you figure everything out for them & do all the petty bureaucratic paperwork for them. Theyâre going to Oberlin because you want them to be smart. Why are so many of you making noises like they are developmentally disabled? STOP IT. They arenât who you think they are. They arenât afraid or intimidated by the things you think they are. They are afraid of and intimidated by things you have never even thought of. You probably canât help them and theyâre probably too embarrassed to tell you. This is when they have to start standing on their own feet and learning self-reliance. Please donât interfere with that. Iâve seen that turn out so badly so many times, especially with guys. Guys have to learn to wash their own clothing. Eventually theyâll have to learn to cook their own food. The co-ops will be great for that if they choose. Oberlin will help them. If they have issues, on-campus counseling is very good. If you are that stressed about sending your no-longer-a-baby off, maybe you should try a session or two of talk therapy as s/he prepares and leaves. Figure out a way to take a mini vacation to reward yourself & celebrate parenting well done after getting rid of him/her. Do not let your kids think your life resolves around them. Thatâs a bad example to set. Show your confidence in their ability to stand on their own feet. By now you should have given them the skills. RELAX! Except for paying for it the hard work is done!</p>
<p>Yes, I took gang showers. Yes, I shared a shower with lesbians. And men. And never collapsed into a tingletangle on the tile or got herpes or crabs. Even though I wore a 30I bra. I believe gang showers are all gone now (sorry Dad, those thoughts going through your mind about those junior roommates across the hall just are not going to happen). Instead of thinking of them as an instigator to licentiousness, think of them as security against anorexia, self-mutilation and incredibly poor taste in tattoos. If they arenât gone, normally there are âDial-A-Johnsâ to specify whether the occupant is OK with others, male, female, or not at all (not in my day, there is more sensitivity and awareness now). It isnât indoctrination for future nudist colony membership.</p>
<p>Breathe. Itâs all gonna be OK. If you must weigh in, advise your child how unwise it would be to select a dorm room to share with two other people if they are having a group relationship. Inevitably it ends as a pair and someone gets shut out. They shouldnât share housing in college with someone they are having a romantic/sexual relationship with. Humans, especially young ones, need space and freedom to discover who they are and change as they discover it. Hint, hint.</p>
<p>As long as there are other gender specific showers, it shouldnât be a huge deal!</p>
<p>There are several all female floors in case there is concern as to the results of a vote.</p>