Friends bought a terrific house in Niantic CT. It’s a little further than an hour to Boston, and I am not sure where the nearest train station is.
The house is in an over 55 development but theirs is a small one…less than 30 houses. They do need two cars…but everything is a short drive.
There are places within walking distance of the downtown…and beach…but I’m guessing those are more costly.
Again I suggest Westerly RI. Cute downtown. Not sure what residences are located nearby, however.
Just as a point to check out when you’re looking - some commuter rail lots fill up so check that out when you’re looking at towns.
Grocery store or market within walking distance means large load of groceries doesn’t have to be a factor. You’ll be able to shop more often, buy fresher produce, etc.
I have to agree with the potential problem of parking at rail stations. The one nearest my house fills early morning with commuters. You can’t just drive there at say 11 and expect to go into the city for the afternoon. There won’t be any parking.
Weather forecasts usually talk about more snow “north and west of 495”. It’s definitely a different weather pattern.
For 55+ communities, be careful of the restrictions on how often your daughter can visit and how long she can stay.
Outside of 495 pretty much takes you outside of your 1 hour desired commute anyway.
Massachusetts is known as Taxachusetts, so NH might be worth a look (but it’ll matter whether you will have incomeor property.). Since you want to get out of the NJ frying pan, make sure you know where there is fire.
I love the Portland Maine idea. Very hip little city. Train service to Boston. Easy airport. Further than you want but it might check many boxes.
I love Portland but the train takes 2 1/2 hours to get to Boston.
Massachusetts’ moniker is somewhat outdated. The state now ranks 19th for tax burden among US states, with a 8.90% state rate for state and local taxes. Maine, surprisingly, is #3 with 10.84%. Of course real estate is less expensive in Maine so the tax rate probably evens out and you get more bang for your buck in Portland than most parts of Boston.
We have been in Portland Maine a few times (on the drive up to Bar Harbor). It is lovely but much too far to Boston.
What about Wells or York Maine?
Or Portsmouth NH as suggested by others?
I get it, @kiddie . Portland is by no means as bedroom community of Boston! And the train is slow.
In MA, virtually all, if not all, apartments and apartment-style condo complexes do not allow grills on the balconies or near the building. This is a state fire regulation. The only exception is a first-floor uncovered porch or patio with exterior stairs, and even then the mgmt or association is unlikely to allow it. So if having a grill is so important, none of these places will work, and you will be limited to townhouse-type units (of which there are not many in MA) or a free-standing house. I don’t know what the regulations are in NH or RI.
We just down-sized into an apartment in Waltham near the downtown. It’s a great area, very walkable, pretty diverse, tons of restaurants and shops, train station is a short walk, but having to share walls with our neighbors has been a big adjustment after 35 years of being in a house. Think hard about whether you can deal with this. Although there is a certain entertainment value listening to our neighbors go at it at night. 
@kidde How long to you anticipate being there? The transaction cost will be steep if you buy and wind up moving in a few years. It might be cheaper to rent, after factoring in all of the costs of owning a home, particularly if you buy something that needs work, as sadly $500K does not go far in most towns.
Many apartment or condo buildings have shared community grills, but that may not be optimal if you grill very frequently.
Yep, I am thinking townhouse or single family would work better. We have no idea how long we will stay somewhere, but our thoughts are we can move again if need be. I really want “move in ready”, over renovating a house (been there done that).
While we would love to live near our kids, fact is…they are like gnats. I don’t expect either of them to live anyplace forever…and would not base my housing purchase on where they currently live.
In other words…will your daughter be staying in Boston forever?
A move in ready house within an hour of Boston is going to be a are nut to crack…especially within walking distance of cute downtowns.
If you don’t mind having and using a car, really, I suggest Niantic again. Very nice up and coming coast town so prices haven’t yet gotten out of hand. For $500,000, you should be able to find a move in ready place. There are a bunch of little developments there, some over 55 and some not.
Based on info you just provided, I am updating my recommendation.
You really need to check out Providence. Downtown condos at your price point will be amazing. On the east side near brown and risd too.
Easy access to 95. Commuter rails all day and night until 10 or 11. Amtrak augments this all day too.
Boston nyc easy train. Beaches and Newport are fantastic.
Best foodie scene in ne and arts vibe. Trinity rep and plac for theatre. Dunkin Donuts Center for major acts. “Waterfire” on weekends thru fall. Google it. Downtown outdoor rink. Major mall. All within a short walk.
Crime is pretty low for a city.
Water views of the bay from most downtown condo buildings.
Everything is walkable. Your kids will come to see you.
Check out the condos at water place park. You can walk to all mentioned above in five minutes from this spot. The train station is in the shadow of this building, one minute walk from the front door.
Also check out the condos off of Thayer or a bit further down by wayland square. One is the heart of the east side and brown happenings. Wayland square is an adjunct but all of these have restaurants shops coffee spots all over the place. Running and walking trails along the black stone boulevard. Bike path that goes all the way to Bristol on the bay.
All less than five minute to ten minute drive to the train or the highway.
Best of all is you can join the anthaneum near brown. It’s the most beautiful private library in the country. Great Public libraries as well. Once again all with steps of downtown or the east side.
I just had a conversation with a friend where she warned me about following your child. We have only one child, nothing is keeping us where we are now (no dear friends or family we will regret leaving behind), why not find someplace we like nearer to her to live. We like Boston very much and don’t want to retire someplace warm. If we find a town we want to live in, then being near her is a great bonus. Also, I have gotten dozens of ideas of places to live with the restriction of being close to Boston. I can’t imagine trying to pick a place among millions that would fit my other criteria and not be near Boston!
There are a lot of great neighborhoods in Boston itself, particularly if you’re not put off by a little urban grunge.
https://www.bostonmagazine.com/property/neighborhood-guide-jamaica-plain/
https://www.bostonmagazine.com/property/neighborhood-guide-south-boston/
https://www.greatamericancountry.com/places/local-life/great-neighborhoods-in-boston
https://www.bostonmagazine.com/tag/neighborhood-guides/
https://www.bostonmagazine.com/property/2019/02/26/top-suburbs-boston/
@privatebanker I completely agree! Providence has all of what the OP desires and looks like a pretty perfect fit. It’s just not on the radar of most, which is probably another reason why it’s so great.
Totally agree about Providence! I’d love to move there for retirement!