Aside from my biological relation to my father, he is a complete stranger. I haven’t seen or spoken with him a single time throughout my entire life, and he’s never paid child support.
However, most of the schools I applied to require the non-custodial parent to complete part of the CSS Profile – apparently they don’t give aid without that part of the Profile.
What do I do? Thank you
You will have to ask for an NCP Waiver. You will have to send one to each school to apply. Your mother will have to do a write up describing the circumstances. You will need supporting letters, not from an aunt or anything but from someone like clergy, school principal, guidance counselor, family doctor. They will want to make sure this is a legitimate situation, but waivers are given in such situations. Be sure to apply to some FAFSA only schools as well.
Be sure to include schools on your application list which do not require non-custodial parent information, or where you can afford them on merit scholarships or at list price. Make sure that your safety is such a school (affordable at list price, on assured-for-your-stats merit scholarships, or on need-based financial aid without requiring non-custodial parent information).
@ucbalumnus …so you’re saying my dads negligence will prevent me from getting aid? doesn’t sound right
You need to have someone like your doctor or rabbi write a letter that you can submit with your waiver request indicating that you’ve never ever seen your dad and that he’s never paid support.
Waivers are cases like yours.
Based on what you wrote:
the title of your post is
HELP:My dad won’t do the CSS Profile
To me it sounds as if you have contacted him and he has refused to file the forms.
To the OP. Did you contact your dad, and he refused to do the Profile?
OR…do you have NO WAY to contact him?
Please clarify.
And did you apply anywhere outside of the Ivies and Stanford?
And did you do Questbridge? Are you Pell eligible? Did you do Gates M also?
Yes, his refusal can effectively deny you financial aid at schools which require non-custodial parent information and do not grant you a waiver.
Many schools (and rightly so) assume that parents have the primary responsibility to pay for their kid’s college educations. Aid that you receive from schools is generally paid by other families who are paying full tuition, so schools need to have some pretty firm lines drawn on when they will allow a parent to get off the hook. If you don’t even know how to contact your parent and they have never paid child support, you have a decent shot at getting a waiver at some schools.
Yes, please clarify…
You say that you’ve never talked to him, yet you say that he says that he won’t complete the form. How do you know that he wont?
Do you know where he lives? How was he contacted?
anyway…the fact that you’ve never seen him and that he’s never paid support will likely be enough for you to get a waiver at most schools that require his info. Contact each school and ask what they need to get that waiver.
(in cases like there, it makes you wonder if the kids would be better off if “mom” never listed a dad’s name on the birth cert.)
Ah, a whole different topic… my niece’s mom did that. My brother fought this, and ultimately a version was issued with his name on it. The mom continued to use the one without his name, until he died unexpectedly and she wanted to collect social security for my niece. Then the mom scrambled down to the courthouse to get a copy with his name on it (she had disposed of the copy she originally received, I think). Not sure how this would work if you tried to add the name after his death – but there could be financial advantages in life to having dad’s name on the birth certificate, too.
@sybbie719
I don’t have contact information, and like I said, we’ve never communicated.
Do they really expect me to dig up his number after he abandoned us 18 years ago and ask for his help?
That seems odd, given that he is a literal stranger
@thumper1
did not contact him
do not have contact info
mom makes <25k/year and is on disability
There is no reason to try to have contact with a parent you have never met. I do not believe the schools expect that. . They do expect you to fill out the waiver form and supply it and the specified supporting information to each college. Since you need a waiver and you do not know for sure that you will get one, although I believe that you will, then you need backup schools that don’t require NCP info. I told you in the first post to do a waiver, why are you still asking about digging him up?
Barring any domestic violence or child endangerment issues, actually colleges do believe that students and their custodial parents are making a good faith effort to communicate with the non custodial parent. Some schools are asking for the name of the parents and are offering to make contact. I notice this year, waivers are not being given as easily as they have been in the past
Padr…contact the schools. Apply for a non-custodial parent waiver for the Profile. Ypu will need to provide documentation regarding your lack of contact with your dad. This could be a letter from a minister, rabbi, counselor…someone who is not a family member. Discuss this with your school counselor at your high school. If your dad has never been on your school records, and has never been involved with school, perhaps they will help.
You might get the waivers…and you might not. But try.
If you don’t get a waiver, you will be expected to get that NCP info.
Your lack of contact over 18 years, and hopefully your mom’s lack of contact…could, if supported by an outside source, get you a NCP waiver.
File for NCP waivers. You have to do this for each school, and each school could have its own specific things they require in order to get the waiver considered and granted. My guess is that you will get at least some waivers. But as Sybbie who is in the system and as seen results, some schools may be more difficult in granting them and not give you the waiver. But it’s extra steps you have to take.
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Ah, a whole different topic… my niece’s mom did that. My brother fought this, and ultimately a version was issued with his name on it. The mom continued to use the one without his name, until he died unexpectedly and she wanted to collect social security for my niece. Then the mom scrambled down to the courthouse to get a copy with his name on it (she had disposed of the copy she originally received, I think). Not sure how this would work if you tried to add the name after his death – but there could be financial advantages in life to having dad’s name on the birth certificate, too.
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lol…well I guess a gal could keep a DNA sample of the dude just in case he later dies and SS payments are needed. I have heard of paternity, post death, being established that way for SS payments.
"I don’t have contact information, and like I said, we’ve never communicated.
Do they really expect me to dig up his number after he abandoned us 18 years ago and ask for his help?
That seems odd, given that he is a literal stranger"
Not as odd as you might think. For schools that request/require NCP info, they often think that lack of contact or of a good relationship simply does not excuse him from they consider to be his ethical responsibility as your parent.
So if you know who he is or how to contact him, they expect you to try.
They also think that college costs are not exactly unforeseeable, and therefore you are expected to do your best to patch up relations with him well before filling out college financial aid applications. If you and your custodial parent have consistently made efforts to reach out to him (and can verify that), that’s one thing; if you and your custodial parent maintained the isolation from your side, that’s another (not good) thing.
Think about Arnold Schwarzenegger’s recent situation. He had ‘no contact’ with his love child (didn’t acknowledge him) for most of the child’s life, but now that he is recognized, of course he will be expected to pay for college or at least the state won’t be expected to pay with financial aid.
This actually happens fairly regularly with absentee parents when the custodial parent applies for state/federal services like food stamps or TANF. The custodial parent fills out the form with the info for the biological missing parent, and the state seeks reimbursement for the aid. It doesn’t matter that it has been 10 or 15 years, the obligation is still there.
That’s why the schools are requiring the student/custodial parent to do a little work, track down the NCP, at least make the request. Who knows, the NCP may be in a much different financial situation than he/she was 18 years ago and may actually be able to pay.