<p>prompt: is it important to question the ideas and decisions of people in positions of authority?
I got the adolf hitler example the second I wrote the prompt, but I spent way too long thinking of a second example. I thought that Animal Farm would be a great one but I couldn't recall the story specifically enough to be confident to write about it, so I just went with Obama. Please give it a score (1-6) and tell me how it could be better. Thanks</p>
<p>There is a reason why people in positions of authority stand where they are. They exhibit great leadership and make strong decisions which allow people to trust and follow them. Despite this, it is critically important to question the ideas and decisions of these people. Many times, leaders with too much power can become corrupt if unquestioned by the followers. This was clearly the case with Adolf Hitler, whose decisions were plagued by racial hate. Also, President Barack Obama has made some controversial decisions that should and have been questioned by Americans. For the overall welfare of any society, the leader should always be questioned.
Hitler was both a great leader and a military genius, but his methods and ideas should have been questioned from the start. From the beginning of his reign as a leader, he held a strong hatred against all people who were not Aryan white people with blonde hair and blue eyes, especially Jews. This hatred extended so far that he personally authorized the execution of countless Jews during the holocaust, the most infamous event of genocide in history. Had his followers strong opposed his extreme cruelty and perhaps stripped him of his power, millions of innocent people would have been saved. A corrupt leader such as Hitler should be constantly questioned.
Although not a leader spurred by racial hatred, President Obamas decisions should also be reviewed. His decisions are made from goodwill but often are risky. His plans to recover the economy are often farfetched or seemingly ineffective. The proposed stimulus package, for example, is incredibly expensive and seems to be very risky. Such decisions should be closely examined by the Americans to ensure that they are the best choices for the nation.
Leaders should hold authority, but should constantly be checked by the followers. Hitler should have been questioned and stopped by the German people. Barrack Obama and his decisions should also be closely examined. For the world to be the best place it can be, leaders must be questioned.</p>
<p>I think I said questioned too much, but I ran out of time thinking of a second example so I had to write quickly =/</p>
<p>Analysis of the topic is sparse. Most of your Hitler example is spent telling the reader who Hitler was. The reader knows who Hitler was. The question wants you to discuss questioning the leader. All you really said about that was that, if people had questioned him, there might not have been a Holocaust. Okay. Did they question him? Did anybody? What was the result? What does the answer to that question lead you to add to your discussion?
The Obama paragraph has a similar problem. Much of the paragraph is about the stimulus package. You say it’s expensive and it’s risky and that’s why people should question him. You also said people should question him and they did. Okay. Who questioned him? What difference did their questions make? Did he ignore them? Did he listen to them?<br>
Forget about Obama and Hitler. Think about questioning leaders in general. In the world, who questions their leaders and who doesn’t? Can you think of other countries where people have tried and it worked or didn’t work? What problems can you run into when you do question leaders? And which leaders are you questioning? Think of teachers, parents, the police, the military, and other kinds of leaders.
Are you beginning to see how many things could have been said that your essay overlooked?
Test prep advisors keep focusing on examples, examples, examples. Examples are one kind of supporting detail. What about reasons and facts and ideas? You use logical argument to construct an essay, and examples are a part of helping your reader to understand your points or to show that the situations you are talking about in a general way are actually manifested in reality. Examples have a purpose within your essay, but they aren’t the only thing you need.
You want to improve your essay? Learn to ask basic questions quickly. Who, what, when, where, why and how. FOR EXAMPLE; Who are the leaders you want to question? Who asks the questions? What questions should you ask? When and where should you ask them? Why then and why there? And why ask any questions at all? What’s the best way to ask them?<br>
Are you getting the idea? We could persue this much further, but this should be enough to get you started. Practice on some of the topics in the Blue Book or whatever prep guide you are using. Just see how many questions you can list in one minute. Do it several times. Race a friend. Those questions will jump-start your thinking and give you plenty to talk about in your essay.</p>
<p>Try it and let me know how it worked for you.</p>
<p>3 or 4 out of 6 I’d say… so like a 7/12 maybe then - not bad, not good.</p>
<p>Hitler maybe an example that SAT graders get bored of reading over and over. The Obama one was a good example I’d say, but lacked insight. So an average essay, slightly above average because you had a fairly solid intro.</p>
<p>Could you grade my essay for me, thanks? - I’ll do a chance back too! Or grade another essay if you post it!</p>