How much are your parents helping you out?

<p>My parents pay for my tuition, room and board, and text books. They also contributed more when I lacked a job. I’m happy that they contribute so much, but I also chose certain things to minimize costs as much as possible. I chose an in-state school that I loved over the private college in my dream city. I got a job that paid a stipend and room and board for its duration so I wouldn’t need to worry about it. I got two part time jobs during the school year and cut down extraneous costs.</p>

<p>My parents both had very similar attitudes. My mother didn’t go to college and she always said that she would not pay for my college, even when I was a senior in high school.</p>

<p>That being said, my parents still do contribute to my education and my well-being, but it’s definitely not “free”. My dad owns his own law office and it’s run by him and my mother (his legal assistant). I get dragged there throughout the summer to help witness wills and deeds and things like that. I also have to file away files every summer. Whenever I’m home, I also have to take care of my younger sister. She’s nine, but she has autism. If I ever want to go out with my friends, I have to clear it with my parents and make sure that they don’t need me for either taking care of my sister (while they’re at work or something) or that my dad doesn’t need me to go to the office with him.</p>

<p>My parents spent about $1500 last year on my tuition. They paid my phone bill ($25/month), feed me in the summer/on break (if I choose not to eat with them, then I have to pay), and most of my medical bills. I usually end up having to pay for my own medication, but that’s because I prefer to actually physically pick it up instead of getting it through the mail. In the mail it’s free, but if I go to a pharmacist, it’s $5 for a 30 day supply.</p>

<p>If I ever need money throughout the school year, they’ll usually send me some. $75 here and there. I’d say they probably give me about $400-500 a year, but that gets spent on things like gas for getting to/from home and other miscellaneous items I need.</p>

<p>All in all, my parents help out a lot, but they definitely wouldn’t if I didn’t help them out.</p>

<p>My parents pay phone and insurance. I like it because they can’t hold money over me, not that they ever would. </p>

<p>I agree that managing your own finances is a way to independence. I think parents give their kids wayyy too much but that’s their choice. The idea of giving your grown child walking around money is just not something that flies around here. And yes,I do think many people will have trouble adapting if parents turn off the stream instantly upon graduation. </p>

<p>On the other hand, I don’t think a parent paying for school is a recipe for failure. It’s when parents give everything rather than shifting responsibly to their child that they’ll be in for a shock.</p>

<p>I’m not in college yet but my parents have already discussed this with me. My parents are divorced and my mom and my stepdad are willing to pay 1/3 of what is needed each year for 4 years. After that I’m on my own. My dad on the other hand really can’t afford to give me anything, I’m not sure what he’ll do. Chances are he’ll pay for a couple books each year which I completely understand.</p>

<p>My parents don’t pay for anything. Not their fault though, they’re poor and below the poverty line. I didn’t grow up with anything materialistic, no computers (until high school and that I saved up for working summer jobs), no ipods, console games, or even a vacation out of my home city. </p>

<p>They’re struggling, I’m struggling. It sucks having to worry about getting the bills paid every month, knowing that there’s no fall back plan. </p>

<p>Do I feel more financially independent? Yes.
Do I feel like I’ve worked harder than the other kids who have everything paid off? Yes. </p>

<p>Can you construe this as arrogance? I don’t care. I’ve had nothing growing up, and nothing now. I had less growing up than the poor kid who can’t afford to go to prom. </p>

<p>So in the end, to all you saying that being on your own doesn’t give you a right to feel superior to others. Let me ask you this, how much have you achieved with your parents footing your bills your whole life?</p>

<p>There’s nothing wrong with being proud of independence and financial responsibility because it is a true accomplishment, and it isn’t something everyone achieves. I applaud anyone who has managed to reach the point of complete independence as an undergrad.</p>

<p>I just don’t want to be judged because my family has money. I completely acknowledge that I have help and a great advantage regarding finances; I try to be grateful but humble about it. I have the utmost respect for those who are putting themselves through school and are making it work despite struggles. But please, don’t assume that I am going to go out and fail the moment I graduate. Just because it isn’t something I face now doesn’t mean I won’t be ready when the time comes. Sure, I may have difficulties, but I’m not an entitled brat who’s in for a rude shock. I strive to understand and prepare for the responsibilities I’ll have in the future. </p>

<p>And while money is a big issue, it isn’t the only privilege. I have friends who, while poor, have advantages that I don’t have because they’re smarter, more talented, or better looking than I am. Lack of money isn’t the only adversity, either. I’ve experienced my family falling apart, depression, anxiety, learning disabilities, and health problems. I do consider overcoming this and being on track in my education an accomplishment, even if I did have financial help. </p>

<p>Please just don’t assume that you completely know and understand someone’s situation, whatever it may be. Belittling a person for any reason is close-minded, and, in my opinion, shows that you likely haven’t taken the time to truly get to know them.</p>

<p>Papertown: Agree with you 100%.</p>

<p>People who support themselves straight out of high school and work their way through college should rightfully be admired. My husband was one of those. </p>

<p>However. kids who get everything paid for aren’t set up for failure either. My parents generously paid for my college education and put me up for a few months as I looked for work. I have been independent and supported my family of four alone for decades. Depends on the individual.</p>

<p>“Let me ask you this, how much have you achieved with your parents footing your bills your whole life?”</p>

<p>The better question is: who cares? We all achieve things to get to the next stage of life. For example, we take the SAT to get to college - once we’re there, who cares? </p>

<p>You pay your own way to get through college - once you’re done and land a job, who cares how you got there? </p>

<p>I have a partial scholarship and job, but my parents still help with expenses - once I’m done this year, I’ll be financially independent, so again, who cares how I got there? </p>

<p>I’m not going to flounder. I’m not an idiot, and I understand the concept of living within one’s means. You make it sound like one should be ashamed of having parents who are willing and able to pay.</p>

<p>Wow that’s a pretty bold assumption to make there, guy. My parents have handled everything for me in my life and I’m grateful for that. I take issue with people assuming that because my family does have a lot of money that for some reason my siblings and I won’'t be able to handle their finances when we graduate. It’s a fundamentally flawed premise because we’ve been taught by the greatest examples of how to manage money: successful parents, especially those in the financial sector. I think I’ll be fine when I graduate seeing as I’ll have a job at a hedge fund waiting. I think I’d be fine either way though, seeing as money management was something instilled into me my entire childhood.</p>

<p>That much said, to answer your question my parents are completely covering the cost of college and all my expenses. I’ll get about $1000 to spend each semester.</p>

<p>It’s not even the fact that you’re going to be set up for financial failure, obviously you’re not if your parents are footing the bill. The hard part isn’t writing the check or making the call to set up a phone line. I’ve been writing out checks and making phone calls for my parents since I was in middle school, you wrote a check, big whoop. </p>

<p>The hard part is getting the MONEY, worrying about the MONEY, where is that MONEY coming from. </p>

<p>Who cares how you got there? Seriously? You think you’ve earned something in life because your parents paid for your bills and set you up with a nice internship and/or job at top notch hedge funds? </p>

<p>I find it ironic how people who get their bills paid off are peeved at the supposed ‘arrogance’ of the OP because they feel like they are more independent because their parents don’t pay for the bills. </p>

<p>It’s funny how people who get their bills paid off by their parents are taking shots at the OP by saying things like “big whoop, you’re financially independent, stop acting so arrogant”.</p>

<p>Unless you have been there and done that, you don’t deserve credit where credit isn’t due. You’re not even giving credit to the OP for financially independent, some even have the audacity to knock the OP down for perceived arrogance, unbelievable. </p>

<p>Some people are given all the tools to succeed in life, and some even make out well. Good for you, do you feel the need to knock other downs who have also succeeded in life while being given less than you? Does it make you feel inferior because the got to the same level as you with half the things you got? </p>

<p>Give credit where credit is do, to the OP, good job, I don’t see arrogance, I see an individual who has taken what they were given and doing a whole lot more than what others have done.</p>

<p>I’m a parent.</p>

<p>I can’t even imagine my kids being able to pay for themselves while in college unless they were a night/part time student.</p>

<p>If I thought they could do it, believe me, I’d let them. </p>

<p>My HS senior knows he must take the max federal loan every year. He (and me) have certainly done a lot of research. He is applying to many schools that have large merit awards. Even with large merit, I doubt he’d be able to cover all costs himself.</p>

<p>Back in my day, many of my HS classmates were able to pay for college on their own. I just don’t think it is feasible today. At least not in my state ¶ where the state directional schools cost $20k/yr.</p>

<p>Who here is saying, as you quote, “big whoop, you’re financially independent, stop acting so arrogant”? I think one or two posters called OP out for being arrogant, but no one else. Most of us have said we admire those who are financially independent. And absolutely no achievement, no matter how amazing, warrants an arrogant attitude. </p>

<p>ApTester, you sound incredibly bitter. Even if you are financially independent, you likely won’t get very far if you act like you’re above everyone else.</p>

<p>@ApTester</p>

<p>You seem really angry so I’ll let you pick the fight you’re looking for with someone else. I just want to say that I never suggested I’d earned a single thing, simply stated it’s good to know that those money troubles simply won’t exist for me. </p>

<p>Like you said, who cares how you got somewhere, right? So why do you think your life story gives you the right to put yourself above people who were born into a more fortunate lifestyle? Or even the right to judge those people?</p>

<p>Also, since I got caught up in my first post: congrats to you and the OP, it’s no small feat to make something out of those situations. If I knew y’all, I’d try to help anyway I could. It’s an accomplishment that truly speaks for itself.</p>

<p>I’m saying this with all possible respect and kindness, costa, not that it’s going to come off that way. Kids like me don’t want help. We’re not charity cases. We’re doing just fine on our own.</p>

<p>"Who cares how you got there? Seriously? You think you’ve earned something in life because your parents paid for your bills and set you up with a nice internship and/or job at top notch hedge funds? "</p>

<p>What are you talking about? You sound unbelievably bitter. Of course, credit is due to those who are financially independent. A number of my friends work b/c their parents aren’t involved in their lives - I respect them more than they know.</p>

<p>But who are you to assume that someone’s parents have done everything? I’m a first generation college student, and my parents don’t even know what a hedge fund is. I worked my tail off to land a research internship this summer - they didn’t even know about it until a few weeks ago. You’re in no position to say that someone hasn’t “earned something in life.” You seem to be assuming that everyone who gets help is a spoiled brat.</p>

<p>I only wish my parents could help me out, when it comes to paying for school. They pay for my phone bill and have been paying for my dorm things but refuse to put a cent toward my education, resulting in me taking out 14k in loans for just this year alone. It blows.</p>

<p>^ 1) You are taking out WAY too much debt.
2) There is no way you have 14k in loans on your own. Did your parents cosign?</p>

<p>You really should find a more affordable option NOW before you wind up with 60k+ loans upon graduation.</p>

<p>@romanigypsyeyes </p>

<p>Haha it doesn’t come off as rude or anything at all. I think I misspoke though. I didn’t mean help like give you money for tuition or anything. More like little subtle things like offering to pay for dinner or something. If someone refuses that, then it doesn’t hurt me at all, I respect them and their independence too much, it’s just something my mother always taught me to do. I hope that doesn’t come off as condescending or anything.</p>

<p>“More like little subtle things like offering to pay for dinner or something.”</p>

<p>The little things can still be demeaning. I’m lucky enough to have never offended anyone, but I’ve seen some of my friends get ****ED when someone offered to pay out of “charity.” The best thing is to simply not bring up money at all.</p>

<p>I’m a kid from a 0 EFC family considered to be under the poverty line and I don’t understand the attitude of others in my situation who get angry at the fact that others have their parents to pay for everything.</p>

<p>So what? I don’t think that someone who doesn’t have to have a job through school is any worse or better than someone who does.</p>

<p>I worked hard my first year of college. I pulled out a 4.0 first semester and a 3.9 second semester while working part time in order to pay off my tuition. I found out my financial aid was going to be cut by at least $1500 last year and I ended up at the Financial Aid Office broken down in tears because I had no idea how I was going to make up that difference this year.</p>

<p>That being said, I completely envy those kids who aren’t in the same situation as I am, but I’m not bitter about it. I also don’t think I’m any better than they are. It is what it is. Life hands you lemons, so you make lemonade. If your parents have money, that’s great, you’ve got an advantage.</p>

<p>If your parents don’t, you also have an advantage of possible boosts in your chances of admission to universities and to different types of financial aid and scholarships. Had my own father not gone to college, I would have actually had the advantage of having at least $2000 extra every year of college due to my school’s “Gamecock Guarantee” program for First-generation/Low-Income Students.</p>