<p>akdaddy and hsmom-
Over the course of high school, I have learned to deal with stress, and then to deal with stress more effectively. I feel that I am capable of handling whatever stressors college life hurls at me. What I find odd is that my parents don't object to my applying to other competitive schools, and it seems to be the MIT name that freaks my dad out. (Where as "MIT" has glowing connotations for much of the population, apparently for him it does not.) What I need to convey is that MIT is not hugely more stressful than other elite universities.</p>
<p>katek - </p>
<p>Why don't you write down the pros and cons for each of the schools to which you intend to apply and discuss with your father? And you are right - never go behind the parent's back. It does not work. </p>
<p>You will be showing your father that you take his concerns seriously. It's a lot of money that he will be paying over the next four years. Address the stress factor when you communicate with your parents. I have found MIT students to be extremely resilient. They have no choice. How will you feel when you get back an exam and it does not have an "A" on it? How will you feel when you have two psets due, a paper due, and a exam all on the same day? How will you handle that stress? </p>
<p>Make no mistake. I am not discouraging you from applying to MIT. From students past and present I hear of a love/hate relationship with the school. They love the school but when they are "hosed" different emotions prevail. Selecting a college is all about fit and match. Take the time to write down your thoughts in a coherent fashion. Discuss them with your parents in a calm fashion. Listen to their concerns and count to 10 before responding (saves unnecessary arguing!). They want the best for you and you want what is best for you. The college application process is probably your first "adult" decision so approach it that way when you speak with your parents. The parent/child relationship is moving to a new level at this point. Respect the concerns of your parents and they will respect yours.</p>
<p>Keep us posted.</p>
<p>Hey, katek, I just thought of a few other sources (straight from MIT, no less) that could help you out).</p>
<ol>
<li><p><a href="http://www.mitadmissions.org/topics/parents/intro_to_mit_for_parents/index.shtml%5B/url%5D">http://www.mitadmissions.org/topics/parents/intro_to_mit_for_parents/index.shtml</a>
[quote]
Isn't the academic pressure intense?
MIT is a demanding intellectual environment, and most students wouldn't have it any other way. But we recognize that freshman year is a time of major adjustment, as students who are accustomed to being at the head of the class encounter an incredibly talented group of peers. To ease that transition, in their first semester all freshmen are graded on a pass/no record basis. The pass grade is the equivalent of C or better and appears on a student's permanent transcript. If a student receives the equivalent of a D or an F, no record appears on his or her transcript.
[/quote]
</p></li>
<li><p><a href="http://www.mitadmissions.org/topics/pulse/the_match_between_you_and_mit/index.shtml%5B/url%5D">http://www.mitadmissions.org/topics/pulse/the_match_between_you_and_mit/index.shtml</a>
[quote]
The ability to prioritize balance. Work hard, play hard. Despite what you may have heard, this place is NOT all about work. To be successful here, you must prioritize some measure of down-time. Therefore we like to see that you've prioritized some down-time in high school as well. Question #3a (Tell us about something you do simply for the pleasure of it) is not a trick question. Answer it wisely.
[/quote]
</p></li>
</ol>
<p>
[quote]
What I need to convey is that MIT is not hugely more stressful than other elite universities.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>ha, i think what might actually be the problem is that.. it is.</p>
<p>
[quote]
ha, i think what might actually be the problem is that.. it is.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>not more than harvard. definitely not more than caltech.</p>
<p>Definitely more than Harvard, at least at the undergraduate level (Harvard Law, etc. are in a class all their own in this regard). Probably not more than Caltech.</p>
<p>I'll repeat my assertation from upthread that science and engineering are stressful (or should be) in any reputable program.</p>
<p>That's not true though. Raising the average grade does not reduce the stress, it kind of just pushes competition to a whole new level: B+ vs. A instead of F vs. P.</p>
<p>Talk to some premeds at Harvard. I would venture to say they're more stressed out than the ones at MIT.</p>
<p>Even with MIT's new admissions policies, Harvard admissions is much more holistic, meaning they select for people who aren't the strongest in class or don't care about class as much as their EC's. Consequently, it must follow that it is easier to outperform these "holistic admits" in class. (Of course, the more relevant question is to ask whether an MIT admit would be stressed out more at Harvard or MIT, not whether Harvard or MIT students are more stressed out. Harvard students may tell you that calculus is tough--it's relative to their native ability and work ethic.) Also, grade inflation is prevalent at Harvard, at least when comparing to MIT. The mean for most engineering classes is the B/C cut-off. Harvard's own president said grade inflation was a problem.</p>