<p>I would LOVE to apply to/attend MIT. The problem is that my parents are just a wee bit overprotective. My dad recently told me that I shouldn't even bother applying to MIT because he would never let me go there. He is irrationally afraid that MIT is "too stressful" and that going there would directly result in my becoming mentally ill or committing suicide. I have tried to point out the MITblogs (which showcase the very human aspects of MIT students) and some statistics ("Look, Dad, Mit's suicide rate isn't any worse than any other school's...") to my dad, but so far he just isn't listening. How can I convince my parents that MIT isn't a pit of misery/deathtrap?</p>
<p>Do you know any people who currently go to MIT? Family friends, maybe? I think it'd be helpful if your father personally talked to a few people who go there and get a first-hand account of what it's like to go there.</p>
<p>Unfortunately I don't really know anyone who goes to MIT. You're right...that would make things easier! I think the lack of personal experience with MIT is what makes my dad so apprehensive about letting me apply there.</p>
<p>MIT is 'stressful' in a way that directly results in you becoming sane.</p>
<p>Well, you might want to tell your dad that the average MIT student takes a courseload of 48 units per term. One unit is supposed to equal one hour of time spent per week, so most MIT students are spending about 50 hours a week on school. That's a time investment, for sure, but there are plenty more hours in the week than 48.</p>
<p>MIT is stressful. But science and engineering are stressful no matter where you go.</p>
<p>Your dad is right about the stress levels, but there are ways to blow off steam from academics such as intramurals or clubs, etc...(I know this from two friends attending MIT as sophs right now)</p>
<p>Thanks for the hints so far. I talked to (argued with) my mom this morning about college applications, and she seems to be warming up to the idea of MIT. My dad, however, is the ultimate barrier. I have to collect my data and research before I re-ask him to let me apply to the Institute! :)</p>
<p>Hey katek, I'm in the same boat as you, though my parents have had a few years now to warm up to the idea that I'm applying to MIT no matter what they say. ;)</p>
<p>What really swung them in my direction (they had many of the same worries as your parents, + really far away from home, not Catholic [God forbid!], "nerdy," etc...) was the fact that they realized that I would fit there. My mom came with me to the information session in our area last fall and that was what really convinced her that MIT would really be the place for me. Unfortunately, my dad didn't come so I'm still working on him...</p>
<p>Anyways, beyond the stats, you have to show your parents just how much MIT means to you and how well you'd fit in there. It's one thing to "prevent" your kid from commiting suicide- it's another to squash their dream.</p>
<p>For some reason I can't edit the above post. Anyways, you might find the first part of this rather amusing (it's from my blog).</p>
<p>why do you have to ask your parents' permission to apply? if you can scramble together the 60 dollars or whatever it was, then just send it off no matter what they say and have the conversation again when you find out if you got in?</p>
<p>Ducktape--
I read your blog post about the info session...too funny! (Hags! lol) I will check the MIT admit page to see if they're hosting info sessions near me this fall or winter.</p>
<p>iostream--It's not a matter of having or not having the admissions money; it's a matter of doing something behind my parents' backs, which they consider to be a near capital offense. If I furtively applied and (miraculously) got in to MIT, then let my parents know, I would not be allowed to go for sure. My parents have expressly said that I am not allowed to apply; going against them like that would really not win me any points with them. I need to have this conversation now so that I can get my parents' "blessing", so to speak, to apply.</p>
<p>Just curious, katek, to which college of comparable caliber do your parents let you apply?</p>
<p>maybe see if you can convince them to do a campus visit. mit is a lot more chill than is popularly believed.</p>
<p>lol, Ducktape, my parents were also convinced that I was going to become "a flaming liberal," until they visited. They they decided that MIT was the lone oasis in the sea of devilish liberalism that is the northeast. ;P</p>
<p>Unfortunately, we're only paying the money to visit if I get accepted. So, this time in <7 months, cross your fingers for me (good god! when did this time-passing-thing happen?), and maybe then I can convince my midwest-conservative father otherwise, too.</p>
<p>Don't fight with your parents! And don't go behind their backs. Very counter productive. This coming from a Midwest dad who is sending his last child off to MIT next fall. My wife and I had alot of the same concerns, early on. Believe it or not, you and your parents are all on the same side - they want you to be in an environment where you will excel and love your college years. My guess is that if you want to come to MIT - then you are all about that too. </p>
<p>I'm a "you get more bees with honey" guy. Ask your dad what it is that really bothers him. Ask the probing questions to try to get below the surface to uncover the real reasons. Get a good list and then set out to get the facts that will (most likely) ease his concerns and set the record straight. Between the MIT website and this board you will be able to get almost anything covered. Set time aside to have the conversation in a relaxed not rushing out the door setting.</p>
<p>Another thought would be for you to reach out to a MIT Parent connector in your area. These are parents of current students and they will talk through your parent’s questions. Our local representative really helped us during this last year. See this web site.</p>
<p>From our perspective, it took visiting campus to see how cool MIT is. And it can be a bit overwhelming at first, with Mass Ave running right through campus. So don’t try to rush it. We were there on a Friday and it was buzzing with energy! Having visited at least 25 college campuses with our kids, it surprised us with the amount of activity. On many campuses you could shoot a cannon across the center of campus and not hit a student on a Friday. We both walked away realizing this is a special place – and not just Engineering, but learning. Attending CPW is a must for your parents if you get in! It is the best program we have seen and many sessions just for the parents. </p>
<p>Good Luck with your folks and the college application process. This can be very stressful for everyone. So relax and have some fun with it.</p>
<p>MIT stressful? If you want to go there you will take that stress in stride. If it seems to be too much it probably is. Make no mistake, it is a serious commitment to years of work to attend MIT. Do it only if you think you are interested in the intensity and challenge, not because of the name.</p>
<p>akdaddy hit the nail on the head. </p>
<p>Science and engineering and tough areas at any school but you will feel more intensity at MIT. Your parents only want what is best for you. Gather your thoughts, write down pros and cons of applying/attending the Institute, and go from there. Thin k about your personality. How easily are you discouraged? Do you have a lot of perseverance? Are you afraid to ask for help when needed? Do you like to collaborate with others? I think these are questions that you need to ask yourself. </p>
<p>Enjoy the college application process.</p>
<p>parents who think they know what's best for their children outside of keeping them out of legal trouble, discouraging prejudice, or encouraging them to be self-supportive are not being very helpful to their children i don't think.</p>
<p>try printing literature and also explaining to your father how much this really means to you; i don't see how he can say no. it's one thing to steer you in a direction, it's another to outright say "no" when you make it clear that you are not interested in that direction.</p>
<p>Seefoxrun --
Thank you so much for all of your advice and insight! I didn't even know that parent connectors existed. I think that they sound like the kind of people I need to look up and get in contact with! Also, my dad is a "you get more bees with honey" type of person as well. Unfortunately, I am just a bit too vinegar-y sometimes! I will talk to my dad when he gets home from his business trip tomorrow and see what REALLY upsets him about MIT. I promise I will try the "honey" approach! lol</p>