REA at Stanford does not give you a boost in admission chance. They also reject ~80% students directly in EA. The question is whether your D is going to have anything to improve her chance in the upcoming months. How is her stat and EC? Does she has legacy there? In addition, there is no gender bias in admission for engineering at Stanford. Last year, they admitted 743 out of ~7300 applicant in EA. The EA admission rate is around double of RD, but it is mainly because of the mostly highly qualified students in the EA round, legacy, and recruited students.
Applying MIT or Stanford EA/REA will not make a big difference in terms of being accepted or not, unless your D is a legacy or a recruited athlete.
Apply early if all her stats are already competitive enough and do not need any more improvement (Think 3.9+ UW, 2200+ SAT, 33+ ACT, preferably top 1-3% of the class, less if the school is highly ranked).
Just pick the school she likes the most. Stanford and MIT have 2 of the most extensive supplemental applications and with the deadline only a 5 weeks away, have her start on the supplements soon as if she waits any longer, she might be overwhelmed by the amount of essays she has to write for 1 school alone.