I received a brochure from Andover about Q&A for parents. It is beautiful and informative. However, after I submit, I do not need that unless my child is granted admission. It may have been helpful to see that before we applied. Given the selectivity of the school, it does not need to send something like that to sell itself. Frankly, all it did was remind us that we are awaiting a decision and turn up the anxiety dial a notch.
Another school had a coach reach out to discuss SwamiJr’s athletic experience. This contact is a little more defensible since maybe the kid is on the fence and they want to find out if he is an impact athlete or they are trying to sell the school a little. Even then I sort of don’t want to hear from you unless you are giving me a decision.
Generally, unless the school needs to have clarity on a topic or needs a portion of the application completed, I would rather hear nothing after we submit and before the decision.
How about you?
I will add being invited to receptions in the area for prospective students, alumni, and current families. We have now been invited to two that are scheduled during this period between January 15 and March 10. We are not excited about a two hour trip into the city on a weeknight for either of these, but worry that if we don’t attend, it will be interpreted as lack of interest in the schools. Ugh.
@westcoastmom987 Wow…that is significantly worse than my examples. I would feel pressure to attend as well. Giving the schools the benefit of the doubt, I wonder if it is worthwhile to let them know (after M10) that these things are generally not needed/helpful.
The situation is complex but one can argue that, without these events and points of contact, tuition could be just a little cheaper and the process could be less anxiety filled with no impact on the school’s attendance, yield and/or student quality.
It is possible the lesser known schools might grab a student or two than it otherwise would due to these communications but I doubt it and certainly doubt the ROI is high.
That said, I don’t think the schools care and certainly few are struggling financially…spend the budget if you’ve got it.
I agree with you @TheSwami and @westcoastmom987 . Last year when my son applied we had communication similar to what @TheSwami described about 2 weeks before M10. Full disclosure - he did not apply to Andover or any acronym school for that matter, but to schools that get a various amount (although not enough, IMO) of mention on CC. In addition to nice photo books, we also had a coach contact my son - most likely to determine if he would be an impact athlete. The coach contact made sense, but I also found the photo books and the timing to be confusing. In the end, for us, the schools that communicated with us prior to M10 were the ones that delivered good news on M10. Although I have read posts on here that describe lots of contact from AOs and coaches in between January 15th and M10, and the kids were wait listed or rejected.
As for receptions in major cities mid-week, thankfully we were not invited to any of those!! That type of invitation would have left me wringing my hands in anxiety over what to do! I can’t think of a more inconvenient invitation than one that would ask me to drive 2 hours into the city, on a weekday, when we all have to balance work and school the next day. Ugh!
He was also contacted by one music director, since he played first chair of his instrument in middle school. I thought I would mention that, since it is not one you hear of as often on CC. The director was clearly trying to determine if he planned to continue playing in high school.
At the school DS attended, we were invited to a play and a reception before it in Feb. We went and were thoroughly impressed by the folks we met, especially the students. We were too naive to realize we were “supposed” to attend, and thankfully, we had good news on M10. We loved the transparency of the school. For us, it was helpful – relaxed free-form time to get a sense of the community. And it did influence the decision., Had we had bad news or been more aware of how the process worked, I can see how it could feel like pressure.
It’s definitely a tough one.
I forgot about the play and reception invitation, @gardenstategal . Although I remember that event being mentioned during our interview, so I guess it was more clear that this was something all prospective students were invited to. That being said, we were not able to attend that weekend since we had a previously scheduled commitment, and I did wonder if our non-attendance would demonstrate lack of interest. I remember I had my son send an email to the AO explaining that we really wanted to attend, but had a conflict with a family event that weekend. In the end, our non-attendance did not hurt his application. Maybe we’ll be able to attend in 2020, since my 7th grader is interested in applying there as well! 
We received the above mentioned photobook from one school, lots of emails with general school info from another and absolutely nothing from a third since our interview. I’m afraid to read much into any of it at this point. The weeks seem to be crawling by! I think an invitation to something might actually make me feel better, but the pressure to appear on a weekday, hours away would be hard! I wish boarding school had early decisions! Lol
@gardenstategal one of the schools our DS has applied, invited us to go see a play this weekend. There is no mention of a reception. Do you believe these are sent out to all the applicants?
@reluctantdad, no idea! I tend to think it’d be cruel if they weren’t at least seriously considering your kid.
@ReluctantDad Just curious. Was it Groton??
Long time lurker here, but amen. We got that Andover mailer which got me excited for about an 1/8th of a second. We also got a mailer from Choate…about their summer school (hey, let’s make a deal!) and an email from Groton about live streams of upcoming athletic events.
The creme de la creme, almost literally, may be Emma Willard. They sent a box of chocolates. That is either exceptionally thoughtful or will have been a brutal tease. It sure pumped up her hopes. Did other people get chocolate?
I give a lot of leeway to the schools - after all, we’re bugging them a lot – but I just don’t understand the objective here. The analog would be while the kids were considering admission offers to send more letters of recommendation to schools they don’t intend to accept.
Good luck everyone.
Yes I think those emails with invitations to plays and games are sent to all applicants.
@DevonAultOrBust Couldn’t agree more! Not sure about the chocolates bc kiddo didn’t apply there but I put that in almost the same category of post application requests to “rank where our school fits on your list” and “hope to see you this fall” comments. Tough on the kiddos for sure.
I think I remember someone mentioning chocolate from one of the girls schools last year - although it may have been in the acceptance package.
I think some of the single sex schools actually communicate their decisions about a week ahead of M9/10 - so maybe you will hear soon! I would certainly take a box of chocolates as a positive sign…
@DevonAultOrBust please come back to this thread after your decisions. Sending chocolates to anyone but an admit is over the top. What purpose does this serve even then?
I would love to hear a different perspective that can make sense of why this would be positive for the school AND the average recipient.
I will happily come back (here and/or a Decisions/Stats thread like previous years)! Just watched the whole Emma Willard virtual tour, etc. and am quite excited for Bryn Mawr-for-High School.
At this point every email, etc. is sending me into a mild (or total) panic. I had a request for more info yesterday. I’m hoping that’s a good sign. Surely decisions have been made, right?
I’ve gotten 1 email asking me to repeat, but other than that complete silence… sort of unnerving.
At this point I’m desperate. Email me the lookbooks and newsletters again!