I wish they'd told me.

I’m a few months into my “Gap Year” before heading to college next fall. After talking to some friends in school back East, and meeting many wonderful people here on the West Coast, I’ve come to a conclusion that has shaken up my college app process this time around. I feel the need to share this, and I hope someone like me gets the message that I couldn’t.

I decided to take the year off because I was, to be frank, mad at myself for not getting into a top college. I’m from the East Coast, I went to prep school, and I was certainly one of the most academically driven and highest achieving people in my graduating class. The way I saw it, I was a failure for not attending a school as prestigious as my classmates. Unfortunately, when decision time came around, things didn’t work in my favor. Call it bad luck, call it poor planning, but every school I applied to (save two “safeties”) rejected me. It was tough. I refused - naively, and stubbornly - to attend the more financially generous of the two safeties. I designed my gap year, and the summer before I headed West, around getting into my dream school. I had a plan, and I was determined to make it work.

Things have gone well, but the people I’ve met along the way have changed my perspective. Two of my best friends here are roommates that live a few blocks down the road from me. They are both incredibly intelligent, interesting, talented guys. One is a Dartmouth grad. The other is in his final year at the local community college. Each is going to be successful in life. The only difference is the incredible amount of student loans the Dartmouth grad has to deal with every month.

I’ve applied Early D to a selective school back east, a place that rejected me last spring, but this dawned on me the other day. I’ll be FINE if it doesn’t work out this time. No, I’ll be better than fine - I’ll get to figure out a way to make it work that doesn’t follow the path I initially thought I was on. Please, PLEASE believe me here: Your alma mater, be it Harvard or your safety school, will NOT determine how much success you have in life. That’s up to you, and the attitude you bring with you.

Very True! I have often told my kids I would rather hire the guy who worked his butt off to get A’s and B’s in school, than the genius that showed up and got A+s.

In my prestigious management training program right after college, the guy who ended up doing the best was the one from the state schools, while the rest of us were from selective LACs. He worked hard and had the personality to get ahead. In real life, you can’t always get ahead by staying up til midnight studying!

Good luck to you - I am sure you will enjoy whatever road you find yourself on.

Entitlement, pride, arrogance, narcissism all cast aside for enlightenment.
Admit it, you were insufferable back then.
Don’t you think that you are a better person now?
You’ll go far with your new look on life.
Good luck.

Love this.

Really Touched.

Congratulations, Skiguurl. You definitely figured it out. But don’t bother wishing anyone had told you this. You had to see it for yourself. Good luck.

Thank you.

I’m so glad that you shared this with us. And I’m also really lucky to have had this epiphany a few weeks ago, as well (currently a high school junior).

I completely agree!! All of my life, I had my mind set on Harvard because my parents wanted me to go there. But honestly, I realized last year that there are many different paths to take in order to become successful, and I didn’t have to go to an Ivy to accomplish that.

We’ll all be happy wherever it is we choose to go.