If I Could Change Something About Freshman Year

Student Lounge College Life
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Hello everybody!

Now that we’re well into the first week of August, the idea of going back to college is ever-present in our minds (well, my mind at least). For some people here, it’s the beginning of their freshman year and I am sure they are a whole bundle of nerves and looking for advice and hoping not to make mistakes.

I am hoping this thread can include posts from current/recently graduated college students detailing any mistakes they made freshman year and/or what they would change. There are a ton of posts out there on the internet giving advice to new freshmen, and those are all fine and dandy, but frankly I ignored most of them going into freshman year. I’m hoping that reading the actual, real-life mistakes made by actual, real-life students suffering through (or enjoying!) college in the 21st century will help new freshmen avoid making those same mistakes (or at least make them knowing the risks!)

I will start! Here are a couple things I would change that I can think of off the top of my head. I’m sure there are more:

1.) I would talk in class. I held my tongue essentially the entire year. My super-smart classmates were ridiculously intimidating. They came up with detailed responses and in-depth ideas/musings off the top of their heads. I had to think about what I wanted to say for a solid five minutes and by the time I formulated something relatively intelligent in my head, we had moved on to a different topic. I was so afraid everyone would think I was an idiot, and after a couple months of silence I felt like it would be too weird for me to suddenly talk. So if I could go back, I would start talking from day one and never stop. Who cares if people think your ideas are stupid or that you’re annoying? At least you’re getting your voice out there.

2.) I would talk to my professors. I still have no idea how to use office hours. I find it hard to ask questions. I don’t know how to ask for research opportunities. These things are all on my to-do list of things to learn.

3.) I would throw myself into the social scene right away. I only did the required orientation activities. I stayed holed up in my room. I didn’t put myself out there because everyone was asking the same stupid questions (“What’s your name? Where are you from? What’s your major?”) and I figured I would have time to meet people later. Well, “later” showed up and suddenly everyone had like 500 friends?? And I was left totally alone. Just put up with the stupid, generic questions. Ask your own stupid, generic questions. Everyone’s doing it. Get people’s numbers and text them asking if they want to hang out or grab dinner. Go to the orientation activities, even if they sound dumb. No matter how juvenile everything feels at first, your first semester will SUCK if you don’t make friends! (Although I survived and made friends later and it’s totally okay if you can’t make friends at first and you will still be alright. But it sucked for a while.)

Add your own in the comments! Comment on other people’s mistakes! Freshmen are welcome to ask questions about their fears/concerns as well!

Good luck to all the freshmen. You’ll survive no matter how many mistakes you make.

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I like this! I hope more people will add to this thread. It’s helpful to incoming freshman (like me) :slight_smile:

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1.) I wouldn’t join the honors college at my university (I’ve dropped it now). It was a new program, poorly organized, and basically just extra classes that had little to do with my major. I was also irritated by the inflated egos of everyone I met in the college. It just wasn’t my thing, even though I had done the whole honors-competitive-AP routine in high school and enjoyed it then. That’s not to say that honors programs aren’t good for anyone, or that all honors colleges were bad. It’s just something I would change about my first year.

2.) I would challenge professors on unfair grading (in a polite way, of course). I had a professor that gave the same mediocre participation grade to everyone, no matter how much or how little they participated. I ended up with a lower grade letter because of it. I should have at least approached the professor and asked about how the grade was determined, instead of just accepting it.

3.) I wouldn’t start a new job the first day of classes. I don’t handle stress very well. I ended up quitting after two days, partially because of the stress, and partially because it was a terrible situation (they didn’t train me at all, but expected me to know how to do the job right away; then they scheduled me twice my requested hours per week).

4.) I would reach out to people more during classes. I made plenty of friends outside of class, but it would have been nice to have more people to talk to before the lecture or whatever. It is way too easy to just show up to class, speak to no one, and then leave. But it’s boring, and eventually others will be having conversations with their neighbors, and you’ll just be sitting there like a bump on a log.

5.) I would be more confident in myself. Maybe that sounds silly, but I wasted a lot of time worrying about whether or not I would fit in and the like. I was also worried that people in college would seem so much older than me and I would never have anything in common with them. As it turns out, I did. In fact, I found that I meshed with a wider variety of people in college than I ever did in high school. And most people are open to making new friends (at least, the people who are worth having as friends).

Overall, I liked my freshman year (just in case anyone got a different impression). There will always be things to regret or wish to have changed, but that’s part of life. We learn and move on. Good luck to all the freshman going to college this fall!

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I would have gotten a job first semester. I didn’t know if I could handle working on top of school, but in hindsight it would have been easier to drop something if necessary, and it would have helped my resume (not that it hurt that much as I did get an internship, but I would have had more choices with prior experience).

I also would have gone out with friends more. I’m rather introverted so often times I wanted alone time on the weekends and wouldn’t go hang out with friends - most of the time I spent with them involved studying. While it’s great to have friends in your classes, I realized this summer that many of those friendships aren’t really going to last. So I wished I would have spent some more time with them outside the context of school.

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Interesting that one of you thinks it was a mistake not to get a job and the other thinks getting the job was a mistake.

@runner019 I definitely relate to posts 4 + 5. I had a number of classes where I didn’t bother to make any friends (plus it seemed like everyone was taking the class with a group of friends anyway) and it made study groups/any group projects hard. It also made for a lonely hour! And the confidence point is key and is definitely something I have to work on next semester, too. You just have to believe you are as intelligent and interesting as everybody else!

@baileyj57 I can relate to wanting to go out with friends more. Big parties just seemed so intimidating and I didn’t make a group of friends that I felt comfortable going out with until late second semester, so I mostly lived vicariously through other people’s party stories. Next semester I’m going to force myself to be more outgoing and do more fun, Instagram-worthy things!

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  1. I would figure out office hours. They probably would have helped for my English class, where I got glowing feedback from the prof in class and then missed points for unknown reasons when I turned in the final draft.
  2. I would make friends. Somehow. It was a damn lonely year.
  3. I would set boundaries with the roommate I eventually ended up with. She was super inconsiderate and I didn't say much because a) she kinda scared me and b) I hate confrontation and c) I felt like I had failed at the most basic of college friendships/relationships (twice!).
  4. I would eat better/more. The walk to the dining hall started to seem like too much to handle after a while.
  5. I would make an effort to keep up with my HS friends more, especially the ones on campus with me.
  6. I would visit the library more often. It's quite nice, and the leisure reading collection looks great, but I was always too tired or too busy to leave my dorm.
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I wish I didn’t eat so much Burger King because losing the 20+ pounds this summer has been a huge pain in the ass.

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@preamble1776 But, on the other hand…CHICKEN FRIES…

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@bodangles You could smell the chicken fries from 100 feet outside the dining hall which made the salad bar seem far less appetizing.

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I would start exercising right away. Didn’t until the end of first semester, but even with the delay it was the best decision I made all year. Yes, you are busy. Yes, it’s a pain to haul your butt to the gym. But you will sleep better, you will have more energy, and you will have a healthier, more balanced life. I hated working out in high school, but I started (pitifully slow) running and Pilates. I sometimes regretted spending an extra hour socializing or studying; I never regretted an hour of exercise.

I agree with the previous comments about spending more time in office hours and reaching out to people during classes.

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I would not spend as much time as I did with my freshman roommate. We got along well from the first minute and hung out all the time the first semester. Then she kind of became stalker-ish and announced that she wanted to have the same second semester schedule so we could “spend more time together.” I should have branched out in the beginning and spent more time with other people.

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Overall I wish I had more self confidence.

This is connected to speaking up in class, visiting office hours, visiting tutoring sessions, opening up to people to make friendships, etc.

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  1. I would have stood up to my inconsiderate roommate, or at least switched rooms if that didn't work. I was such a doormat my first year and would let her get away with anything just because I was afraid to step on her toes. After my freshman year I was determined to go from being almost completely passive to being assertive but polite in those kinds of situations, and it's helped a lot.
  2. I would have been more social. For a variety of reasons, my freshman year mainly consisted of going to class, and between classes either holing myself in my room or the quietest areas of the library. My nice roommate and a couple floormates were my only friends, and I really wish I had expanded my social circle from the start. During my sophomore year I put myself out there more and greatly expanded my social circle that way, but if I could go back and change things I wouldn't wait that long to start being more social.

I guess most of my regrets would come down to a lack of self confidence my first year. Thankfully now I’ve gotten over that, but my freshman year definitely would’ve been a lot better if I had built up my confidence from the start.

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I would’ve made more of an effort to stay connected with the friends I made on my dorm floor. I kind of started hanging out with my sorority way more than them once I bonded with them. I love my friends and all the experiences I had in college, but I would’ve enjoyed hanging out with them more.

I would’ve been more open minded about my major. I came to college in first year engineering where you’re supposed to get more time to think about your engineering major, but I was so focused on chemical engineering that I didn’t even think about the other majors. I ended up changing to ag/environmental engineering spring break of sophomore year. While I graduated on time, I went through hell junior year and half of senior year. That could’ve been avoided if I allowed myself to explore more ideas.

I wish I joined more student organizations. Like engineers without borders or done an epics project. Mostly things that get you involved in more community outreach type things and out of the campus bubble.

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As @preamble1776 said, I wish I hadn’t slacked off with my diet/exercise because the weight I gained is so annoying, LOL.

I am a rising sophomore. I go to a local community college, and a lot of people do associate with the friends that they have had their whole lives, myself included. I am going to try to branch out more this year and make new friends, hopefully.

I also wish I wasn’t so nervous at the start of my freshman year. There really isn’t anything to be scared about; the professors are there to help you and guide you along the way. It’s not that bad.

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I wish I had gotten seriously involved in some sort of extracurricular activity(like one club or something). I never really joined a club, but if I wanted something different to do, I’d go to events held by my ethnic association or workshops held by my department. But beyond that I have no regrets.

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  1. I would have followed my heart in choosing a major. I absolutely loved my Discrete Math class, but other people told me that as a premed, I should choose an easier major, and the number of graduate courses I had to take for an Applied Math major scared me away. Two years of absolute agony, gone the instant I committed to being an Applied Math major; whatever happens, happens.

  2. I would have gone to my school’s counseling center as soon as I started struggling. I was miserable with alternating periods of anxiety and depression, but as soon as I had a good day, I’d convince myself that things were looking up, and that these feelings were just normal, angsty teen feelings. It started seeping into my sleeping and eating habits, and then–in my sophomore year–my schoolwork. I wish I had known that it was okay to ask for help before I reached the point of complete breakdown.

  3. I would have joined clubs right away. Yes, you need time to settle in and focus on your academics. But–and maybe it was just because of the anxiety–I took it too far and convinced myself that I needed to spend all of my time studying / doing work or I wouldn’t do well. And I would have actually looked at non-career-related classes. I’m trying to get involved in speedcubing and twirling fire this year, lol; it’s okay to do fun things with no other end goal besides making you happy.

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There’s really only one thing I’d change… Other than the fact that I could’ve saved a general education course that I didn’t need and a couple GPA points from the A- I got in that class.

  1. Reiterating what many people said, I wish I got involved in clubs as early as the first few weeks of school. That's when there are the most events to do, the most people open to meeting others, you're least stressed with your workload. A lot of people get more involved during the second semester, but I would say not to be afraid to do so starting on the first week as you're missing out on a ton!

Clubs / fun activities? Even if it seems like you have to go out of your way, just do it. And you’ll possibly find your passion that you’ll enjoy all the way until the end of college.

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I wish I had made more friends. I joined a sorority and my boyfriend joined a fraternity, and we both had plenty. But as a junior, I looked around and all my friends were in either the sorority or fraternity, and I didn’t know that many people outside those groups. My major had hundreds of people in it…I rarely saw the same person in 2 different classes. It’s true that the more you advance in college, the fewer opportunities you have to meet people.