<p>I think an approach you could try is to first generate a list of schools that meet your requirements for majors and locations. If you use [College</a> Navigator - National Center for Education Statistics](<a href=“http://nces.ed.gov/collegenavigator/]College”>College Navigator - National Center for Education Statistics) to generate this list using the options on the left side of the screen, you can then export the list to a spreadsheet.
Then, since your GPA is better than your test scores, go through the list of colleges that are TEST-OPTIONAL at [SAT/ACT</a> Optional 4-Year Universities | FairTest](<a href=“http://www.fairtest.org/university/optional/]SAT/ACT”>ACT/SAT Optional List - Fairtest)
and find the ones that are also on your first list. Research those schools to see if you like them and to see how your GPA matches up against their typical applicants.
If you apply to a school where your GPA puts you at the top of the applicant pool, then perhaps you would qualify for merit-based aid if the school has merit aid. Not all schools do, but many schools use merit aid to attract good applicants.
I still don’t think you’ve gotten to the bottom line of what your family’s EFC is. Can your parents use the EFC calculator’s online to come up with a real number you can work with? Try [FinAid</a> | Calculators | Expected Family Contribution (EFC) and Financial Aid](<a href=“Your Guide for College Financial Aid - Finaid”>Expected Family Contribution (EFC) Calculator - Finaid) or the Quick EFC [FinAid</a> | Calculators | QuickEFC](<a href=“Your Guide for College Financial Aid - Finaid”>Quick EFC - Finaid). I think too many assumptions are being made without having all the facts. Having three kids in college will have a major impact on the EFC.</p>
<p>Also, what advice are you getting from your guidance counselor at school? Where are they telling you to apply?</p>
<p>Please try to not be so defensive about the advice people are trying to give you 
Nobody thinks you’re a buffoon. The fact of the matter is that applying to colleges is REALLY COMPLICATED!!! Why else would there be so many books, websites and private consultants out there? </p>
<p>The bottom line is that private schools of the caliber of B.U. and Bucknell are all expensive. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t apply to <em>any</em> dream schools, but try to maximize your chances at both admission and sufficient need-based aid and merit scholarships to be able to afford a private school. That might take some careful research on your part.</p>