DD has a top choice - it is not the most popular school on her list by any means, but we (both her and I ) believe it to be the best fit school for her. And she has already decided if accepted to ALL that she applies to with FA (everything being equal) this is the school she will pick. Is there any harm in letting them know that?
As long as itâs true, itâs fine to tell them. If there are conditions to saying yes if accepted (i.e., need FA), that should also be part of your statement of preference. This is generally helpful to both you and the school.
Imagine that youâre the admissions officer at the other end of this letter/emailâŠâI love your school and its my top choice, but only if you give me enough financial aid.â
All boarding schools have a finite financial aid budget. They can easily go down to the next kid in line who isnât so needy.
I guess my point is, the wording has to be carefully thought out.
If youâre applying for FA and say "This is my first choice school ", thatâs enough. If you say âI will come here if you admit meâ, thatâs not quite the same, and itâs not true⊠As @sgopal2 points out, you want to handle this with finesse. Nobody is suggesting you should put them on the spot.
I agree @gardenstategal. Definitely donât put them on the spot. The admissions decisions are often made in conjunction with the FA budget in hand. Be as direct and honest as possible without trying to imply that they need to give more FA than they were originally planning.
The school she has chosen as her number one pick is, in my opinion, a perfect fit for her personality, wants, and needs. If she were offered admission and fa to every school on her list this is the one it would be hands down. But we can say it better than that.
Thatâs a good way to state it. Include something like, âif we can at all afford it.â Boarding school admissions staff know very well that FA families must be realistic.
Just donât send such a letter to more than one school. You may laugh, butâŠ
But then, remember that kids change. Do not send such a letter if itâs only your opinion. Make certain your daughter is serious about her ranking. Itâs a serious step to send such a letter.
I agree with @gardenstategal that you can say âThis is my first choice.â There is no need to mention financial aid (it may turn off the school), and there is no need to commit to definitely attending (since you canât commit to that yet).
I think saying itâs the first choice would help your DD. Schools want students who are excited about the school.
Kudos to you and your DD to picking the school that is the best fit for her, even though you say it is not the âmost popularâ school.
FWIW- I understand OP is hoping for FA , but I believe that keeping your options open can be really beneficial whether youâre a FP applicant or an applicant seeking FA. Just throwing out my extremely long-winded response from another thread :
As parents, we watch our kids during this process to see which school(s) capture their imagination and usually have a sense for what school is in top spot leading up app deadlines. Some of us know before reaching the car in the parking lot after an interview/ tour- especially if everything went as beautifully as described above. HoweverâŠ
Iâd just like to remind everyone that this (tour/interview) is a two hour snapshot for a 200K + investment. I donât know about you but Iâd like to see how M10 plays out before Iâd allow my teenager to declare his/her undying love for only one school. What happens if FC dream school sends a waitlist or rejection letter M10? Do you think a mature teen (who sent the FC letter) can handle that? Iâll give you a solid MAYBE- depending on whether a viable #2 and #3 came through to soften the blow. But even thenâŠ
Why not settle ( for now ) that your FC dream school feels exactly the same way about you - and even more so after they read your application?
Reminder: A glowing report after an interview is fantastic and truly well-deserved but the AO hasnât even seen the application yet⊠What theyâre doing is encouraging you to apply- which is awesome but try to keep things in perspective: They havenât had the opportunity to REALLY meet your child yet- through his/her application
Regardless: If you get accepted to two or three wonderful schools (including your FC) chances are your child ( even though theyâve said they wouldnât want to⊠) will want to go to two ( maybe three ) Revisit Days. You can run but you canât hide from the excitement of multiple acceptances ⊠and why should you! ( Assuming you actually liked all the schools you applied to ) Why lock yourself in with a FC letter now and miss out on all the wooing and festivities later?
Not to mention another opportunity to see the schools with a fresh set of eyesâŠespecially now that youâre back in the driverâs seat again.
And- letâs not forget: If youâve sent a FC letter and were accepted to that school youâve forfeited your right to attend Revisit Day at other schools- right? Right- because the FC letter is your word. Just so weâre all clearâŠ
Parents/applicants thinking about FC letters today arenât necessarily thinking about Revisit Days tomorrow. Itâs interesting how schools can feel one way (to a family) in Fall and then completely different in Spring- Not always but definitely more often than you think. If you choose two schools to revisit youâll see what I mean. If I had a dime for every time second (or third) choice became first choiceâŠ
Iâve seen it happen in my own life (My siblings - no Revisit Days back then but a lot of back and forth! My kids and many nieces and nephews- who attended Revisit Days) and on threads here M10-A10. Checkout threads from last March/April- and youâll see it, too. Itâs like herding cats (and I mean that in the best possible way ).
I really donât want to sound like a killjoy⊠As a 3G BS Alum, Iâm truly excited for every family beginning this journey. I just want to caution applicants/parents to think (a little bit) further down the road. Itâs easy to get swept up when you see all these beautiful boarding schools and everything they have to offer. And- thereâs certainly no denying a connection when you feel it. All Iâm saying is: Let it play out and see how everything unfolds M10- A10⊠be enthusiastic but maybe just a little bit guarded , too.
When you write the 5K deposit check (which is non refundable- by the way ) and mail it before the A10 deadline- chances are (by that time) your child will be certain (of their choice) and psyched. And, as the parent writing the check (after youâve kicked the tires one last time)- so will you! I donât know about you but (as a parent) Iâve always found comfort in knowing that we followed everything through to the end⊠whether it was exploring other schools despite an obvious Legacy BS (staring us in the face) or allowing time to choose between two (sometimes three) schools - even if that route ended with a frantic (A9) call to an AO and a check sent via FedEx.
What doesnât kill you will make you stronger⊠or something.
So- stock up on the Purple Pill ( for M10 and Revisit Days) and pass the Beta Blockers (for the deposit check) ⊠Youâre in for a (wonderful ) ride.
- The entire thread can be found here : http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/prep-school-admissions/1728735-inside-the-admissions-office-process-p1.html and it's definitely worth reading. All the best to the OP and good luck on this journey!
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I would leave the financial aid out except where it is required. Let the adcom judge your child based on his merit first, then look at his needs on their own. If they want your child enough, and can afford it, they will offer the aid. But they could also come up with FA thatâs significant but still doesnât meet your need. Cast a wide net when yoyu need FA.