Is it okay to write an "in the moment" narrative?

College Essays
1

Hey there!

I’ve finished writing my primary essay (which I’d like to use for Common App and other places) but I’m worried it’s not a “proper essay”. Rather than talking about how I’ve done something “all my life” or over years and years, like most essay examples I’ve seen online, mine focuses on a small moment in my life, the emotions I felt, and how I developed from the sudden turn of events. (To be specific, I wrote about getting kicked off the volleyball team my senior year and how I realized I wasn’t so one-dimensional.)

Can I pull this off? Would it be an “appropriate” essay, and not just some melodramatic fluff that’ll be tossed without a second thought? I don’t PM’ing my draft if anyone wants to look over it quickly.

Thanks in advance!

2

Your essay is fine. They aren’t looking for an essay about something you’ve done all your life, they’re looking for an essay that tells them something about you. When I applied a couple years back, my essay was about why I got a C+ in Physics junior year and what I learned from it.

3

Lots of essays focus on a powerful, seminal event in a student’s life.

4

Focusing on a small event is perfect. Just make sure it showcases in some way how you’ve grown or some aspect of your personality and make sure its well written. The best essays are often those with the simplest topics. Send it to me if you want

5

A single event is fine. BUT, this event sounds fraught with pitfalls. It could be very difficult to write without coming off as having difficulty with rules & authority, and your side may not be nearly as compelling to an adult admissions officer as it sounds to you.

6

Narratives are great when written well, as the ultimate goal is to provide the reader with a slice of your personality. Does it represent and capture you? Is it sincere? If yes, you should be good. Given the word constraints, a small moment can be ideal to convey your mindset and personality. A dynamic anecdotal introduction is a great way to capture your reader’s attention.

Just be wary of how you come across- though getting kicked off is obviously a disheartening experience, be mindful of not seeming negative.

7

Thanks for all of the responses.
I suppose I should have worded my topic better though - I got cut for performance during tryouts, not for anything attitude-wise. Too many people competing for one spot, basically.