<p>That’s the human condition according to existentialists - that life is absurd, meaningless, and ultimately not something that revolves around us. According to them, life only gains meaning through a leap of faith - an irrational sudden personal belief in something beyond explanation (God, love, dreams).</p>
<p>In my sophomore year of high school I began reading philosophy extensively and came to hold this viewpoint - I felt very similarly to the way you do. I was a perfect student as a freshman and I didn’t do anything other than what I was told. However, I soon began feeling that it was ultimately meaningless and insignificant - it meant nothing in the great scheme of things. However, I find myself nevertheless motivated to do things I find personally valuable. I took a leap of faith and began to see value in high school debate and reading philosophy. I see no reason in doing so, but yet it brings meaning to my life. Much like a religious person does not question his/her faith, I don’t question my pursuits. </p>
<p>Is it possible to feel motivated? Yes. Is it possible to feel motivated to do something that you ultimately do not find meaningful? No. (well, yes, but only if you find the authority who told you to do that meaningful i.e. you accept the command of your parents/society on faith). Is it possible to accept man’s existential condition and feel motivated to work hard? Yes, but only if you do what you personally feel is right.</p>
<p>I encourage you to read existential thought or philosophy on finding meaning and, at the least, you will find peace in knowing that there’s an entire body of literature dedicated to the feelings you are having.</p>