I want to write about the frustrating things about my brother and how my parents ignore his behavior, and how dealing with and teaching him have shaped me as a person. With that, I also want to mention how that has brought me closer to my family when I didn’t really show that I loved them before. Do you think that’s too personal or would it be a good topic? Also, would writing a short paragraph about all my brother’s behavior focus too much on him or would it provide background? Thanks!
Depends on how selective the schools to which you are applying are. The application needs to highlight reasons for them to admit you. What does it show the colleges about what you would bring to their community?
I’d say to pick something else. Your emotional growth because your brother is a PITA isn’t very compelling to me unless it’s tied to things you have done at your school and in your community – for instance, if your brother is autistic and learning about the diagnosis prompted you to start an outreach in your HS, etc.
The adcoms don’t particularly care how much you love your family. It’s what actions (at school, in the community) you’ve taken that they’re interested in.
There must be something/ other things else that also shaped you as a person.
That does not show anything to colleges except for suggesting you had a bad relationship with your parents and siblings before.
This is an essay about you. 650 words sounds like a lot but when you actually write an essay out, you’ll realize how precious words are.
I think it could work if it’s really well-written. It can’t read as a criticism of your parents parenting style and it can’t read as a criticism of your brother. Like you mentioned, it has made you closer to your family—if you focus on that aspect, and on how you’ve grown as a person, it could make for a good topic. You want your essay to be personal because you want to stand out. Good luck!
I’m not sure that a vent about family dynamics is the best way to get a college to say yes to your application. You only have 650 words to show them that you would be a great addition to their campus. I think your essay has the potential to have them wondering what your brother’s side of the story would be, and whether you might be a liability as a roommate.
In your other thread you said your parents will only pay for your local university or a top 10 school, and you don’t have the stats for a top 10 school. If they’re serious, you need to be careful not to say anything on your application that could get you rejected from the local university unless you’re comfortable commuting to your safety (your local cc).
If your parents want you both to attend the local university, I’d be extremely careful about what information you share with them. Your brother’s issues aren’t yours to disclose.
It isn’t about any topic, so long as it’s “well written.” This isn’t for hs teachers. It’s for your admission review and needs to show something relevant to that.
How you get along with s pesky brother isn’t it.