<p>I'm sure lots of parents come here thinking, "we're the only family facing this situation," and it's probably never true.</p>
<p>June 1 looms and I still don't know what my son will be doing come August. He is excepted at one school where we have made a deposit but are getting no financial aid and we haven't figured out how we are going to pay for the first year of school (let alone four years). Then, two weeks ago he gets accepted off the wait list for another school, but we haven't heard the financial aid package yet.</p>
<p>He's somewhat set at one school and very tentative at the other. We haven't sent the housing deposit in yet for the accepted school.</p>
<p>So i come here and vent about the possibilities -- (1) we go through with the accepted school, but because we have waited so long for housing, he can't get on campus housing; (2) we get a generous financial aid package from the waitlisted school, but the spots have filled up and he has to defer a semester or a year; (3) we can't make the money work at either school and he has to take an unplanned (for now) gap year.</p>
<p>To add a little salt in the wound of our indecision, his safety school, which he adamantly decided against going to, recently sent a letter offering even more money to him. (Aside from not liking the feel of the campus at the safety school, there's also a concern that the school offering his major may get decertified or even further defunded.)</p>
<p>You are in a tough spot, no doubt about it.</p>
<p>The defunding/decertification possibility sounds like a good reason for not attending the safety. If the school doesn’t offer a reasonable version of his potential major, is basically ha ceased to be a viable safety.</p>
<p>I would not choose option 1. I’ve seen too many people take out huge loans for one year of school and have it not work out. It would be great if the waitlist school came through with enough money to make it work for you. Having to defer a semester or a year is not a terrible thing. Huge debt is. Your S can adjust to the circumstances and get going on planning worthwhile work and/or volunteer activities in the meantime.</p>
<p>If the money doesn’t work at either school, I would go for the gap year. Try to present it as an opportunity, not a setback. Now that you know more about his likely acceptances and FA awards, you and he can recast his list and apply to a fresh set of schools that may better meet his educational and financial needs.</p>
<p>I think what Consolation says is right on- especially regarding the fact that the safety is no longer that. A gap year, while disappointing, is a small blip of time to find a school that he both likes, and your family can afford. Good luck.</p>
<p>as a reminder… if he goes to Expensive School #1 for freshman year, and then transfers, he may have fewer opportunities for merit scholarship as a transfer student.</p>
<p>If I remember correctly, your student is a musician or composer; his chances for merit money as a transfer may be different than other students.</p>
<p>“We haven’t figured out how we are going to pay for the first year of school (let alone four years”. It sounds to me like he should not go to that school. If you can’t pay for it now, you won’t be able to pay for it after a year or two, resulting in his either not being able to continue there for financial reasons or you and him racking up large amounts of debt jeopardizing your financial future. Can you call the school he was just accepted off of the waitlist from and see if you can get an idea of the financial package? If it doesn’t look any better than the first school, he should go to the safety with the idea of transferring after a year, or do a year at a community college and apply to some schools that are more financially feasible.</p>
<p>I think that this deserves emphasis. Not only is it common for transfers to get significantly less FA at merit schools, but it can be significantly harder to get in to some schools as a transfer.</p>
<p>Ptc,The reality is that a payment is needed for the school in a few months. If you cannot come up with the money, your son is not going to be able to go to school. If I remember correctly your son is interested in music. A gap year is probably a great way for him to let that creativity flow and send a direct message to his chosen school that without some financial assistance for him, he isn’t coming. Spend the year, keeping them apprised of what he is doing so that they can make him a priority the upcoming year. </p>
<p>My son is a performing arts major and is living hand to mouth for a second year after graduation. All I can say is that he and I are thankful no loans are involved. It leaves him with some options should he decide to go back to school and allows him to just focus on immediate expenses. </p>
<p>If he takes a gap year, he can research some solid options that are more affordable and more likely to give him money. Both you and he have learned a lot about how the college process and money works. I know I really wished I could do my performing arts son’s college apps over again as we made ever so many mistakes not knowing how it worked and entrusting the GCs who were equally clueless.</p>
If you mean you just haven’t figured which of your options for paying for it to use (dip into a savings account, do an equity loan on your massive equity in the house, use that money grandpa offered for this, etc.) then that’s one thing but if you mean you have no idea where the money would come from and don’t really have the means to pay then that’s an easy (although maybe hard to swallow) decision that’s really already made for you - that college is off the table. People have to face this all the time in their choices of a neighborhood, house, car, vacation, etc. and it also applies in the choice of colleges. </p>
<p>You need to be realistic on any loans you might end up with and have a payback plan whether that ends up being your S, you, or a combo who end up paying it back. If it’ll be your S he needs to have a realistic understanding of his likely salary level upon graduation and if it’ll be you, you need to calculate the number of years and level it’ll take to get it paid off and how that’ll impact work plans, house payoff plans, retirement plans. The reality hits home once you have to take pen to check and write the big numbers. It doesn’t mean not to take any loans - just make sure they’re manageable given your situation.</p>
<p>I have a son who is a musician and a composer. I don’t disagree with any of the above posts, and I do sympathize with the family in question.</p>
<p>I see a slightly different solution, but it may not be right for you.</p>
<p>Of course you don’t know what your are doing right now. You don’t have all the information you need.</p>
<p>I don’t know the safety in question, but I do know that basic music theory courses are going to be the same wherever you go. If his program is defunded, I doubt entry level courses will be defunded. It might be wise to take distribution requirements and basic intro courses at generous safety school and then transfer. I don’t think anything is lost over a gap year except the chance for merit money as some suggest. Two years at safety might save enough to fund a more expensive transfer option.</p>
<p>You might also want to check the list of schools still accepting app’s. If he’s talented in the music area, I noticed SUNY Purchase (an amazing school for music) still has limited seats and does another SUNY (can’t remember which one) also known for music. SUNY’s are under $25K even for OOS. Maybe that’s still too much; I don’t know your situation.</p>
<p>I think there are many options here.</p>
<p>You are justifiably upset with the less than perfect solutions being offered you, but I think there are solutions.</p>
<p>Good luck to your son. Let us know what happens, please.</p>
<p>I agree with the above posters recommending a Gap Year. For your son this could mean studying intensively with a professional composer, playing in ensembles, writing lots of music, entering his music in competitions, and getting his music performed and recorded. And researching composition departments more extensively - including the scholarships they offer. Then, when reapplying next fall he will be a more competitive applicant with a deeper resume - which should result in merit scholarships. It is possible for composers to get up to full tuition grants at the very best programs - no compromising needed. But they need to be a top applicant.</p>
<p>As for taking music theory courses at one college before transferring to another - often for a BM in composition those courses will not be accepted for the major by the second school - they want the student to take their own sequence. But that will vary from program to program.</p>
<p>Do come over to the Music Major forum. Lots of us there only too willing to help if possible.</p>
<p>I strongly second that OP should both read and post on the Music Major thread. (I hadven’t looked to see if Op has done this-)
This is a specialized, complicated situation. Anything to do with Music is so competitive, it is worth it to get lots of input.
I think it does make a difference where one goes for composition/theory/performance etc. To our knowledge and in our experience, music theory varies tremendously. Faculty varies tremendously.
I fully respect the money issues.
Location is one factor - depending where one lives, it may or may not be realistic/worthwhile to do the gap yr idea.</p>
<p>Thanks for the advice so far. Yes, I’ve posted some of this over in the music threads.</p>
<p>I was talking to a parent recently who has a son who is currently a junior at a small catholic liberal arts college. I was expressing my concern over going into any sort of major debt for an undergrad degree and he thought nothing of his son being $50,000 in debt for his undergrad degree. While the job market is getting better, a $50,000 hole is a big one to dig out of if you don’t get a decent job right out of the box.</p>
<p>I’m not sure what you mean about the spots being filled up in option 2. If your S was accepted off the waitlist they should hold the spot until you receive the aid package. I have never heard of a school making you commit before you know what you will need to pay for tuition. My son was accepted off the waitlist and they allowed him to see the fin aid package (usually mailed within a week) before giving them his answer.</p>