Looking for a great fit LAC

College Search & Selection
681

OP, I’m sorry some posts are making you feel attacked. You seem like a great mom. We all have messed up in way or other at some point. Don’t beat yourself up.

My only advice for now would be that she stop doing community service and do less at home in terms of taking care of household stuff and find a job as soon as her choir competition is over. The sooner she starts the working the more money she will have next fall. I know she lives frugally now, but she may want to do new and different things at college and that might take some money. It can be as simple as all the girls on her floor going out to dinner on a Saturday night. It’s nice to have options.

682

I’ve just been a lurker in this thread. There’s quite a list of financial matters on this page, including the payment due dates.

http://catalog.stolaf.edu/admissions-financial-aid/financing-your-education/

683

Hey just want to suggest the idea of being a nanny for the summer. You mentioned your kiddo was a bit socially awkward…one of mine is as well but she is fantastic with kids. It’s a great way to make money. Pretty easy to put some feelers out for the summer.

684

Thank you all for the input. I know that everyone is just trying to help. She and I are both trying to figure it out a little late in the game. She got a phone call from her AO at Coe about an hour ago and called me into the room. The AO called to go over the official FA package line by line with her. It was serendipitous timing. It allowed my D to ask questions about work study, and ask about the difference in subsidized and unsubsidized loans. She asked what GPA she needed to maintain to continue to get that amount of aid every year. The AO asked my D some really good questions that made her think. It dovetailed very nicely into the agenda of items I needed to talk to her about (things that came up here the past 24 hours). It was also a really nice boost to hear them ask how much more she needs to make her choose to attend.

The AO talked to her about her own experience with repayment after graduation, and reinforced that my D would probably not want to come home as much as she thought she did right now, while being empathetic and remember that she felt the same way my D did.

Huge SO to Coe for such amazing attention to the student (They also called to personally congratulate her when she was admitted).

I could not have asked for better timing. And this was her first full FA package with breakdown.

It is a very generous offer and they are reviewing for more after My D saw the gap and said she couldn’t afford it.

The AO asked her what other schools she was considering and asked what the FA packages looked like. My D said the full packages have not yet arrived.

After the call my D and I talked extensively…it’s all quite overwhelming and she’s uncertain because she is waiting for the decision from StO. But it was nice to hear from one of her accepted schools and get a good lesson in FA (for both of us).

She will start looking for work after she completes her IOC which now won’t be until late next week due to the ice storm today and a long weekend because of the holiday.

It’s been a challenge in the past for all 3 of my kids to find work, let alone work that pays enough for her to save several thousand before fall. It’s pretty amazing she has what she has in her bank account right now.

I haven’t really tried too hard tonight to tell her that she needs to give up the commitment that she made for her service hours. She takes commitment very seriously. That’s how she’s gonna see it, as breaking her word and her commitment. But again this phone call was perfect timing.

And she never planned on NOT working. That’s a huge misconception. And I’m not sure what I said to put that impression out there.

However, this first full “official” FA picture really opened up dialogue. Where are making progress and both learning so much.

685

We aren’t saying she isn’t worthy. At all.

What I’ve tried to say is that even best case scenario, there will be a gap that you’ll need to cover. The NPC numbers you posted were $44,400 in St. Olaf grant, $5920 in pell, and the ability to borrow $5500. (There is also the ability to earn $2300 in WS, but leave that out for now as it won’t be available on day one.) Cut that in half, and you’ll have $27910 for first semester.

St. O will bill you $56430/2= $28215. That’s for this year according to the website for ‘billed costs’. Might your award be a little larger? Yes (sometimes the NPCs are using the costs from the prior year and the website is showing the current costs). Might you get more scholarships? Yes.

We are just saying that as of right now, it is looking like a wash for the billed costs vs. the award, so all you have to worry about is your/her costs - getting to school, books for first semester, enough spending money to get her through a week or two until she starts earning the WS money. You control all those costs. And the medication, so you know you’ll need a little more than the average student needs at St.O.

The reason many, including me, are suggesting she start working now, or at least lining up a job, is that we don’t want to see her have to borrow the books, to not have any fun in school right away, to need something and not be able to pay for it. Some classes require computer codes to take tests and you can’t borrow or buy those used (common for science, math, and foreign language). If she has a few hundred dollars in her pocket, she’ll be happier. She can then earn WS funds for the rest of her incidentals. She needs money to get started.

You also said it is hard to find employment for kids in your area, and that the jobs don’t pay much. It might take her longer to find a job, and longer to earn the $1-2k that she needs to start with. It’s also not realistic to think that she won’t spend any money this summer. Gas for her car, ice cream and sodas with friends, movies, maybe some parties before leaving for college. It all adds up fast. If she doesn’t start work until June 1, she’ll only have 10 weeks to work. Doesn’t start until June 15, only 8 weeks. If she wants to go to the summer program, 5 weeks? My daughter lost a week last year because she had to have her wisdom teeth out. Lost another week for a vacation (her choice, I know but there went $180).

This math works out for a lot of schools. Even the most generous (Amherst, Yale) expect the student to come to school with about $2000, but because those are ‘no loan’ schools, the student has the option of borrowing that $2000.

686

It’s great that the Coe AO reached out to your daughter. That speaks well of the college and of your daughter. Again, you and your daughter have nothing to be ashamed of and much to be proud of in how you have dealt with your lives generally and the college application process specifically.

I understand the challenges your children have faced in finding good part-time work. In my part of my state, jobs for teenagers aren’t hard to come by, but in the area where my best friend lives, it’s much more difficult, and her daughter has struggled to find summer work that pays enough (actually, any summer work). Part of her daughter’s issue is that she didn’t have a job the summer before college and now that she goes to school out of state, she can’t compete effectively with young people who live in the area year-round. So hard as it can be to see the connection between activities January of senior year of high school and the summers during college, there really is one.

687

@twoinanddone that post was very helpful, thank you. The phone call from Coe also was perfect timing.
She needs to start looking right away. And we are still operating off a lot of unknowns. She doesn’t know if she’ll get accepted to StO and they will probably have the most generous FA package, and we are only using a NPC to make cost assumptions. It’s too dangerous to get caught up in what is probably the best case scenario when she might not even be accepted.

Which is why it was hard for both of us to take that leap to apply and get vested. It’s so hard to come back down to the reality of other schools even though they are great schools. The contrast is stark.

We actually briefly, for a moment, talked about another state school that was on the other side of the state line but within driving distance, maybe a 15 minute drive. She hasn’t applied there but she would,obviously get in. Because maybe we just don’t have ability to pull any of this off. We didn’t dwell there long, we’ll hear in a few weeks from the other schools about their full FA package and hear from StO.

But we did discuss just calling it if she isn’t admitted to StO and going to UMKC and living at home.
That doesn’t really help break the cycle of yuck she’s been stuck in but maybe that’s the reality?

688

@rosedust We must have been posting at the same time. I’m realizing that maybe none of it is doable, hence our first real discussion about staying home. Like I said we didn’t dwell there long but we put it out there both of us. It’s not optimal for her but it may be our only option.

Also, there are not a plethora of jobs, my youngest D is lucky to have hers at all. She’s maybe earning $120 every two weeks. I can’t think of any of my D’s Friends that have jobs. There are many adults that are filling the positions that high school students typically take in my area.

My D’s peers all thought they would have a job and they all looked for work. We were so lucky she was able to find work at the election office last summer.

689

My question is still what other RD schools she has applied to that are more likely to meet her need than Coe, Knox, etc. I think you said she added a couple, but I’m not sure which ones. Remember that St. Olaf is not need blind. All this could come to naught for that reason alone, and you want to make sure she has affordable choices in April. That is really the name of the game. It just doesn’t matter how much she likes a school if they don’t meet need or something like 98%-99% of it. Casting a wide net is wise in this situation. It will be too late if she is denied from St. O or the package doesn’t turn out to be sufficient. This might be a good time to discuss this with her after the Coe call. It isn’t unusual for 17 year olds to have “magical thinking” and believe a college they like will meet their need even if it isn’t a “meets need” college.

690

@intparent
Grinnell-rejected
KSU- accepted into Honors College
Knox-accepted
Coe-accepted
Beloit-accepted
Drake-accepted
Truman State- accepted
StO-pending
Centre-pending
Bryn Mawr-pending
Kenyon-pending
Earlham- officially pending but I know

I think that’s it…I’d have to go into the common app and look
Centre, Kenyon, and Bryn Mawr were just added as back up in the last few days Kenyon and Bryn Mawr are probably a reach.

ETA: There’s been a lot of discussion about schools she should apply to and I really listened and taken that information back to her. I don’t know what other full need schools are even realistic?

I know that there’s been much discussion about her having a geographical advantage if she goes to the east or west coast, but that’s just a little much for her right now she said she feels like six hours away is about her max comfort level.

I have tried to make her see that her perspective will change once she gets wherever she’s going. But I do feel like the list is pretty well-rounded. I don’t always like what you have to say but I do respect your input.

691

Kenyon is tough for a white female. But your Kansas location is helpful… So you really only have 3 schools on the list that realistically meet need or come very close to it. St O, Bryn Mawr, and Kenyon. Does she have any appetite for adding a couple more? Schools that meet need where the RD deadline has not arrived yet are Colorado College (1/15), Franklin & Marshall (1/15), Mount Holyoke (1/15 - particularly amazing school, IMHO), and Dickinson (1/15 - another great school, and flies a bit under the radar because it commits to meeting 99% of need, not 100%). As none are need blind, the more she applies to, the better her odds of having an affordable choice in April.

692

II think St. Olaf might be partially need blind? I don’t think FA and admissions are working together. I’ll need to do some research on that point. Or not, it doesn’t really matter right now. This is also a good reason to apply ED to a full needs school if you need as much FA as we do. I know that people here will disagree with me, but if that schools has everything you’re looking for in a school and you dealing with pretty black and white financial resources like ours, it can be good to commit early while there is still plenty of aid available.

That’s my naive belief and I’m sticking to it.

693

I think it IS doable. If the FA comes close to what the NPC are showing you are within reach with some work, maybe an outside scholarship for a computer, frugal living (I know, you’re an expert!). Maybe you put $200 of your tax refund into her account. Maybe you sell something you have at home. Maybe she gets a job where her sister works? We have friends who passed down the job at Panera through 4 daughters, with as many as 3 of them there at the same time.

I think you are going to find you have to come up with the same $2000 for any school, so you might as well do it for the one you like the most.

694

She said no to Colorado College, another adult in her life suggested it. She wasn’t into the scheduling. There was quite a bit of discussion on this thread about Franklin and Marshall and Dickinson. I don’t know why but I felt like they both were a huge reach for her. I was trying to be somewhat realistic. We haven’t discussed Mount Holyoke at all. Of course I’ve heard of it but I don’t know much about it.

Of interest though, she thought BMC was beautiful from the website and it’s where my mom (before she died) told her she should go. If my D respected anybody in this life it was my mom whom she misses terribly and tries to,honor her memory every day. It’s part of her drive to achieve so highly in school. My mom was very generous with my D (the car) and the money for her trip abroad which changed her life.

Although, we still get stuck on how far away it is because she’s not grasping that she’s probably not gonna want to come home as much as she think she will. But I’m learning this is not an uncommon thought process for a 17-year-old

695

Franklin & Marshall and Dickinson are both easier admits than Kenyon.

696

@homerdog I’m going right now,to,research those two again, but I’m not sure how adventurous she’s feeling. We literally just discussed that maybe she should stay home and go to,UMKC because everything was feeling unrealistic after some points brought up here in the 24 hours and the call from Coe.

When we put together this list, it was hard. And this list felt overwhelming to both of us. But there’s only a few days left. Earlham may not advertise as full need to but they have a way
and they do a great job. We should hear from them 1/15 officially.

Edited because my stupid iPad keeps adding commas I didn’t add.

697

Two more that say they meet full need and aren’t as reach-y are Denison (near Columbus) and Gettysburg. I don’t know a lot about Gettysburg but visited Denison twice with my son and liked it a lot. They seem to have all kinds of kids there, it was friendly and supportive and people seemed Midwest-nice. Both have 1/15 deadlines.

The farther away from Kansas you get the more of an extra push that could give her. I know she doesn’t want to be too far away—mine didn’t either—but you don’t really have to cross that bridge unless/until she gets in. (That’s how we approached it anyway. You know your daughter best though!)

698

Is everyone feeling like StO is a reach? General consensus kind of thing?
I like that attitude @93pilots that’s why she has app in at Kenyon and BMC. Denison has been discussed and I was interested for sure, I don’t know…I don’t know about much anymore.

I want her to get as far away from here as possible, if it were up to me. I want to leave as soon as my youngest graduates. It’s time to put some of this stuff from the past few years behind us.

699

Kenyon and BMC are reaches compared to St Olaf. With your D’s new ACT, I think people thought they were now a possibility. Even with a 30, though, they are reaches. This is all being done so haphazardly now. I’ve lost track- do you have another viable option if StO falls through? Are any of the other packages close?

700

If she doesn’t get into StO, I highly doubt she will get into Kenyon or BMC.