I’m 56 and I feel like I am losing my memory. Often I can’t remember who I told what, and what other people have told me (short term). For example, I can remember telling someone something, but later I can’t remember who I told that something to, so I have to ask "Did I already tell you about XXX?. I don’t talk much with more than three or four people (I’m retired), so it get’s annoying.
I usually can keep track of what’s on our family schedule, but I also forgot my anniversary this weekend and it made me cry (but I got over it quickly when I found out my husband hadn’t gone to very much trouble to buy my gift - he bought it at the hotel gift shop when he was recently travelling - and it wasn’t expensive at all, lol - but at least he remembered!). To be fair, I had a mild outpatient medical procedure last week. Then got mildly sick with another unrelated infection a day later, so I took an antibiotic which I think I was a little allergic to and it gave me a rash, so I was a bit worried this week and had other things on my mind. I have tended to be distracted when I have a lot of stressful things going on even when I was a lot younger.
I have also noticed that I’ll repeat words when talking for some reason, almost like a stutter, but not very often. I also can’t type worth a flip anymore - I have to proofread everything I write at least three times.
I also don’t/can’t drink caffeine and haven’t for several years, so I never really feel energized and extremely alert like I did when I had a six pack/day Dr. Pepper habit. I feel like I’m going through life in a fog.
I’ve heard that you don’t have to worry about your memory if you can’t remember where you put your car keys - only if you don’t know what car keys are anymore. I’m certainly not at that point.
Has anyone else noticed a decline in their ability to remember things as you’ve gotten older? Is what I’m experiencing typical for my age?
I know that must be frustrating, and probably a bit scary. I have periods of forgetfulness, and then days where I feel like I’ve really got it together and remember everything. I have had a lot of stress in my life the past 18 months, and I do believe that contributes to forgetfulness. Do you have any family history of memory issues? My mother, 79 years old, has dementia,and her neurologist has told me that memory issues are often hereditary. He suggested relying on memory for phone numbers instead of pulling them up on our “contacts” list on the phone. He also suggested crossword puzzles, sudoku puzzles, jigsaw puzzles, etc. to improve memory. If you truly believe you’re having memory issues, consider speaking to your physician to determine if you need intervention of some type. I hope things get better for you!
I’m a few years younger than you and while my memory is definitely nowhere near where it was, I haven’t experienced any of what you describe. Many of the people I work with are over 50 and all are sharp as a whip, although I’m in the computer industry so it’s not a typical cross-section of people.
Forgetting who you told what doesn’t sound too unusual. Repeating words, however, sounds a bit odd. As for typos, I obsessively proof-read everything multiple times. Even my CC posts get re-read a dozen times and frequently edited for typos and clarity in the 15 minute window after posting
@SplashMom Yes, my mother is 78 and is just now showing some troubling memory problems. We think they might be from a TIA/small stroke, however, as she had an episode with a bad headache, was given a steroid shot for some reason, and then the next morning at 2am thought it was time for her 9am follow-up appt. and drove into town and got lost. Her doctor told her that steroids can do crazy things to people sometimes, but she hasn’t been the same since - she got better and much more oriented after a few weeks, but she’s not the person she was before that happened. But other than that, I really don’t know if I have any family history of dementia - three of my grandparents died fairly young from other medical issues, and the remaining one lived to be 99. My father died when he was 74. Cancer and heart problems (due to smoking - which I don’t) seems to be the things that run in my family.
I do think that I could probably use some mental stimulation. I don’t have much of that since I retired. And I certainly don’t use my verbal skills as much - my family members aren’t great conversationalists. Thanks for that suggestion. I had a life goal to learn Chinese by the time I was 50 (which I didn’t meet), so maybe I’ll get out all my Chinese books and give that a go. And then talk to my family in Chinese, lol.
I really don’t think I have serious issues - I think it’s just normal loss of cognitive abilities - I don’t forget where I put things, I don’t forget appointments or plans (except when I’m stressed or distracted) - it’s just the not being able to remember who I had trivial conversations with that bugs me.
I guess I was hoping that some people would chime in and say that they’re in the same boat, but apparently everyone but you and I have the quick and sharp minds of their youth. Or they think I have real problems from my description, and just don’t want to tell me X_X
OP–I have some of the same problems. …sometimes I say, “I must be getting Alzheimer’s.” Are you sleep deprived? I think a lot of my issues are due to stress/lack of sleep/menopause . Have you ever gotten lost while driving? That has happened to me a few times! I’m in a familiar place, but it takes me a while to recognize where I am. I’ve noticed that it is hard to learn new things. I remember French I learned in college, but that Spanish course I took a few years ago? Completely gone. Yesterday I lost an item my daughter asked me to buy at the store. I swore I bought it, but besides putting it in my cart (along with a load of other things), I couldn’t say what happened. Everyone denied unloading/putting away that item. Searched the house/trunk of the car, etc. Was looking for the receipt to see if I actually did purchase it. Finally gave up and bought another one ($4 ). As soon as I bought the new one, my 12yo finds the first one in a cabinet where it didn’t belong. I swear I didn’t put it there in that odd place. But I might have. (Or maybe H is trying to make me crazy??)
Stress, depression, being ill and tired, or bored, some addl Rx, will kick you in the you know what. Learning a language is a great idea. Add in some exercise. Recent study shows how even light exercise over time can stave off memory issues.
Frankly, sometimes we need a CC and social media break, too.
And a little tip from the parents caring for parents thread: a UTI can trigger memory issues.
My H says I misspeak and I say he mishears, so except when we have a kid to referee, we aren’t quite sure who is “off.” Fortunately we catch it, clarify and move on, but it is somewhat irksome. I’m 60 and H is 75 years old.
It is upsetting to misspeak and/or be misheard. H has some hearing loss, which compounds the problem.
We are definitely noticing my folks who are late 80s, early 90s have short term memory lapses. Fortunately, they are in a great SR community that has independent living thru nursing home and memory care, so that is a great relief for everyone. They seem to have adjusted beautifully and already knew more than 1/2 the residents who are members of the same country club they belong to.
@anomander Thanks for your input. I do think that as you and Spashmom have implied - I think I need to stimulate my brain more - it’s just not being challenged like it was when I was working.
But yeah, the repeating words thing is weird. But at least I’m not using inappropriate words - I understand some people with Alzheimer’s do that. I do get my words tangled sometimes, like the other day, I meant to say “I want you to run, not walk to go do… because it’s important”, but I said, “walk, not run” instead. which my kid thought was hilarious. I was never an articulate speaker, and not having to talk to people all day is probably not good for me.
I do take Benadryl every night, because I have insomnia, so that could have something to do with all this also. I think they just did some research and found that it (along with a long list of other very common meds) was not real safe for “elderly” people as it is an anticholinergenic drug that can cause cognitive deficits. I don’t have any choice, as without it I can’t sleep at all, which would definitely have worse effects. I don’t know if I fit the “elderly” category yet, but I guess I’m getting close.
I also had a BP of 90/39 when I had my minor medical procedure this week - I’ve always had low BP, but usually not that low, so that could be a factor also. My doc is not too worried, except that he won’t prescribe me anything that could possibly make it go any lower.
So it’s probably a combo of things that have turned me into a dimwit.
Physical exercise is going to trump any other approaches, sweaty heart-pounding stuff. You are just a youngster, you can exercise in a social environment if that is your thing (shudder LOL) as no doubt social interaction is part of the picture. Sweaty exercise will have the great bonus of helping you sleep. Have you tried magnesium at night?
I think a lot of this is normal, with aging – especially if at age 56 you are also in the midst of menopause. I found I had more mental lapses during menopause then post-menopause — I think it took a while for my brain to adjust to the new hormonal normal. I haven’t had the experience of repeating words, but definite lapses where I forget words or names, and sometimes substituting the wrong word for what I mean. (So a mild aphasia). And definitely more typos, though that’s currently a function of a temperamental computer keyboard.
I’m 63 and in order to keep my mind sharp I’ve taken up the study of four different languages online over the past two years with Duolingo. No way will I ever get fluent, but I’ve made a lot more progress picking up the languages than I ever did back in high school when I studied Spanish… so I’m not really worried about mental acuity. I just thing my brain’s sorting and retrieval system has gotton glitchier as I age. (And yeah, studying 4 different languages means that sometimes I get the languages mixed up when doing the language exercises… but it keeps things interesting)
I had to give up caffeine a few years ago for unrelated reasons and I found my energy level went up markedly when I started taking B vitamin supplements – just regular OTC vitamins – the effect is strong enough that I have to remember to take the vitamin only in the morning – if I forget the pill and then take it in the evening instead I can’t sleep. So it’s something to try to get out of the low energy/ mind-in-a-fog state.
Physical exercise is also good for the mind, so if your lifestyle has gotten more sedentary, I’d suggest increasing activity level. (I personally have failed utterly at making much progress in this area – but I did start yoga a few years ago and I think that has helped somewhat, though not my primary yoga goal.)
@atomom Yes I am sleep deprived - and am menopausal. But no, I have not gotten lost while driving. My mother has though, but she is twenty years older than me. And yes, it is hard for me to learn new things. But so far, I haven’t had a problem with losing things. Knocking on wood.
@lookingforward See my reply #7. I do take Benadryl - probably not helping, but I need to sleep. I actually have thought that participating on CC and social media was probably good for me. I think it’s good for my brain to have to think about how to compose a coherent comment. I also use FB to be active in some interesting groups like Plant, bird, and animal ID. It helps me retain things I learned during my career and also learn new things. I can now identify most of the weeds we have in our lawn and all of the birds that visit our feeder :). And yes, in post #3, I mentioned that my mother has been having some serious memory problems, and a friend of mine told me about the UTI connection (pretty strange effect). She was tested for that, but it was ruled out. I don’t think I have that problem - I had some recent labwork and everything was fine.
@HImom and @calmom Yes! The repeating and misspeaking words is embarrassing. It’s nice to know that I’m not alone in having that problem. It would really help if my daughter didn’t point it out every time I say something that doesn’t quite make sense - a lot of the time I catch it and correct it right before I say it though. She keeps me on my toes as I really don’t appreciate being corrected by a teenager.
Thank you all for taking the time to give me some perspective on this!
I really worry about my memory. So much so that I spoke with a neurologist about it. But, I was given a very basic screening and passed. I frequently forget what I’ve told to whom. I’ve also mentioned a movie to someone who then reminded me that I saw the movie with that person. I will also sometimes not be able to think of a word or use an incorrect word. All very frustrating and makes me worried about my memory. I play sudoku and bridge but don’t see any impact on my memory, unfortunately. No words of wisdom, OP, but you are in good company!
@calmom, I’ve thought about taking B supplements. Do you take one particular one or do you take multiple pills? What dosages? And is this in addition to a daily multivitamin? I’d be interested in hearing any specifics you’re able to share.
I can’t look for the reference now, but there was also something recently about how staring at a screen for hours is not good, cognitively. Maybe another has also heard this.
Anyone can repeat words or stumble for them, when tired. Before you judge yourself old and with no recourse, I’d really suggest some mindful things, the usual: exercise, regular sleep patterns, diet, relaxation and finding some purpose. Plus maybe wean from the Benadryl to a more natural solution. Worth a try.
I am 66 and every Jeopardy show reminds me of facts that I have forgotten over the past ten or fifteen years. Our brains have so much to remember. If I have to do three things upstairs I will often forget to do one since I get sidetracked too easily. I’ll occasionally fudge up a word for no reason too. I blame my memory cracks on medication, heart surgery, and stress.
@LeastComplicated -
Wow I think you may have uncovered a problem with memory- nightly benedryl !!!
Antocholinergics have been linked to dementia. I feel for those suffering from allergies and needing these medications! Did they exist a generation ago ? I don’t think so.
You should really get your B12 checked. Many people over 50 are low in B12 but I was low long before that.
When I get low, my cognitive skills decline noticeably. But I recover quickly when I start to supplement.
A lot of people will recommend the methyl form of B12 because some people process it bettter but I can get results from any drugstore brands.
It’s also suggested to take B12 with other B vitamins.
A doctor will often starts with shots if B12 levels are really low.
B12 is water soluble so you will pee out excess.
I can get similar problems from stress and lack of sleep. Once when I was pregnant and just couldn’t sleep well for months, I had the experience of not being sure where I was in a car. Then when I got a service puppy who kept me up at night for weeks, I had to think about where the bathroom was in my house. That was really scary, but thankfully H was home so I could ask him to take over because I needed a nap. After that I had no problem putting the puppy in a crate on another floor of the house. Nothing like that ever happened again.
As you know, Benedryl causes cognitive problems so you might want to stop that. I find regular exercise helps with sleep more than anything else.
One other think to think about is blood sugar. When my blood sugar is low, I get speech problems. I can’t get a well formed sentence out. Low carb diets are not good for me. Really, really bad.
I might also think about whether you are dealing with depression. It can go hand in hand with these issues as a cause or result.
Another aspect of these medications is their ability to cross the blood brain barrier. When the BBB ( blood brain barrier) becomes impaired “leaky” this may allow for brain inflammation which is becoming a possible explanation for dementias.
As a pharmaceutical rep many, many years ago I discussed the dangers of some beta blockers like “propranolol” crossing the blood brain barrier, causing central nervous effects like- fatigue, nightmares, and sexual dysfunction- and let me tell you male drs certainly cared about “sexual dysfunction” lol
So just saying that drugs you may not even suspect like beta blockers can cross the BBB - weakening the structure ( Google all this it’s out there )
