I need advice without judgement, please… trust me, all options, pro/con lists, etc were looked at. My daughter is going to a school where after her large scholarship and what we should be able to contribute annually, she will need approximately $30K a year in loans. FAFSA gives her $5,500, so we need to find the best option for the balance. If you’ve been this route and have a direction to point me in, I’d appreciate the help. Thanks.
I don’t think there are that many ways to borrow $100k. You can apply for a PLUS loan, take out a home equity loan, apply for a private loan through your bank, or borrow from your retirement fund. As you seem to suspect, there are parents here who are going to advise against ~$150k of debt for any degree, so whether or not she decides to pursue the theater doesn’t really matter.
Choose the loan method that will have the fewest repercussions for her (don’t make her carry any of it). If you have younger children, I wouldn’t borrow against your home unless you’re confident you can pay it back. Have you visited your bank or a financial planner to discuss options? They may be a good start.
As she won't have a secure way to pay back loans if her career choice isn't lucrative, this is your debt. PP or HELOC or private loans. I am not sure how a financial planner can help, you either can or cannot afford this. The question will be whether you are approvable for such a loan. It seems late to be exploring this? What was your plan when you started the application process? The scholarship is only large if it leaves the COA bearable,
@austinmshauri there are people who take out loans of far more per year to finance college, as I said, I’m not asking anyone’s opinion on “yes or no”. Just if anyone has gone through the loan process, was there one place they felt was more helpful, etc. I will not be putting my house or retirement up as collateral.
Go to the schools FA office and it will help you with the PLUS loan. It will be more expensive than getting a HELOC or borrowing against your retirement, but it is your choice.
@Sybylla you’re misunderstanding the question. It’s been explored, we have our options, but I’m looking for opinions from people who’ve been through it to see if they’ve had better experiences from certain lenders than other, etc.
Thank you, @twoinanddone. More of the kind of advice I was looking for. Maybe it was in the phrasing of the question.
Our pretty uniform opinion is that this would be a disastrous mistake even if you can find someone to lend the money. Have your kid start at a CC and transfer, or live at home and attend a nearby 4 year state school, and/or take gap semesters to work & earn. Don’t ruin your finances or hers. It doesn’t do anyone any good if she has to support you in your old age because you borrowed a lot for her undergrad and let your own retirement savings go.
Listen all, while I am pretty sure you all have good intentions, you aren’t answering the question asked, and you have no idea why decisions were reached (nor do I plan to tell you.) No one knows what will be in our accounts in The future to take care of these, you have no idea why this is needed or what plans are in place. CC is supposed to be helpful, and certain threads are helpful and supportive, which is why I felt safe to ask a question here. But I don’t feel that way now. I feel very uncomfortable knowing that someone even researched enough to find what degree my child is pursuing (I never mentioned it in my OP) - that’s invasive and stalkerish. Invasive enough to wish that an admin would close or remove the thread.
Bottom line is if you aren’t answering the question asked (and this should go for any thread), please don’t comment. I didn’t ask opinions or for judgement. No one is in anyone else’s house, same as I’m not in yours. When you know what my plans are for five years from now, we can talk. But you don’t.
It is not ‘research’ to click on your name and see the prior posts. Once you post info on the site it is there for everyone to see and consider when answering your next question.
Decisions made at each stage of the college train ride change the options at the next stop. My daughter decided to go to college, which meant borrowing some money, and now that will have to be considered when making the next choice. She wants to work at Disney, which is minimum wage. She can’t really afford to do that because she has to make those loan payments.
I’ve never looked to see what someone else posted before I answered them, because it doesn’t make a difference. It wouldn’t have here either. And your next stop answer is all well and good, but no one knows why decisions are made. Maybe in a couple of years a trust fund is due that will pay off loans, or a condo that another college student lives in gets sold… it’s not anyone’s business to judge another ones choice. I’m pretty sure I could second guess a parenting choice of every single person on this board, but I wouldn’t because I don’t know why you’ve made it.
So again, the question that is asked is the one that should be answered. I didn’t ask for what the “uniform opinion” is, because I didn’t ask for opinions.
Unfortunately CC member’s can only be as useful as the info provided for a financial question. I am sure you might not realize that after only being a member for less than 2 months. As a member who has received tremendous advice from CC member’s since early 2000 it is always helpful to provide as much details as possible.
In your original post you did not mention that a HELOC was not an option nor was borrowing against your retirement. The output is only as good as the input.
That information does eliminate what others could suggest as options for your queries. As a family our only options were the federal loans. No home ownership to borrow equity from, no retirement to borrow against and not enough revenue or credit for a PLUS loan that requires credit-worthiness to borrow $30K+ per year.
As far as searching for more info looking at other posts’ the info is for all to see, has been for over a decade+. Often times the additional info helps formulate a better and more complete answer to a problem.
Perhaps a family member with access to that much cash for 4 years?
Hope this helps.
Kat
@katwkittens thank you for a respectful, non judgmental reply
OP- if it were me, I’d start with a credit union or other bank/institution associated with my company. (you may have to call your HR rep to get the name of someone there who works with employees of your organization). You could also call the bank where you’ve got your mortgage, although since most mortgages nowadays get sold almost immediately, it may take a LOT of voice mails and “press 3” type of calls until you speak with a human being.
I have heard anecdotally that Capital One is easy to work with (in terms of paperwork, processing, etc) but none of these folks have started paying back loans, so I can’t vouch for the back end experience.
Next, I would actually sit down with that HR rep to explore a couple of options. Your company might have a revolving loan fund for employees kids which is low interest and/or has an interest forgiveness component. You might find a scholarship your company has which you didn’t know about.
Then I’d call the broker/agent for your life insurance. Our agent was always very proactive in sending us publications about college financing and had a few ideas we’d never thought of (borrowing against a whole life policy, for example; suspending payments on our life insurance while the kids were in college to free up cash flow while using the dividend to continue making the policy payments). We had buyer’s remorse after buying whole life policies after our kids were born realizing that we could have bought term for MUCH cheaper, but in the end, it worked out and we were grateful to our agent for some forward-thinking about cash flow.
Just some ideas. Good luck!
@katwkittens There are private bank loans available, i was actually hoping to see if anyone has had experience with certain lenders that they liked working with better than others, that they found to be more cooperative, etc.
And I don’t think she will need that much for all of the four years
@blossom Thank you!!! This was the kind of advice I was hoping for - things that we might not have thought of! 
I think for me, if you have to ask this question here (vs say, bogleheads), in May, then it isn’t anywhere near straightforward. Asking here (vs shuffling your finances) and now (so late, so very late in this game) means there is massive uncertainty. Just because people are right doesn’t mean you have to agree though, for sure. As you have resources outside of your home equity and 401K, leverage that. PP loans are for those with no options AFAIKS. As for the degree, it is highly relevant, no need to be defensive. It is what it is. Sell that condo now.
Honestly, @Sybylla I was just looking for things we hadn’t thought of in addition to what we have going and I phrased it wrong because it was 5:30 in the morning (so mea culpa there.) But “right” for one isn’t “right” for all.
If you have a condo as you suggested, take a HELOC.