Noncustodial Parent Issue

<p>Thanks for the update. Good luck with the waiver, sounds like a helpful communication with Yale — but especially GOOD LUCK with your admissions apps and may you have some wonderful choices to make for school next fall!</p>

<p>I was going to urge you to do exactly what you did – talk to the financial aid office about a waiver. Many folks on CC try to be helpful by telling students that it’s impossible to get a waiver, or that they cannot get one if they have a phone number, or they get child support, etc. The advice is well-meaning, but sometimes incorrect. Schools differ in their policy and each situation is unique, but it’s certainly possible to qualify for a NCP waiver even if you get child support, even if you have contact info for the parent, even if you have in the past had a relationship with them. As you’ve discovered, the first thing to do is always to talk to the FA office, who are the best gauge for you about what will be needed. </p>

<p>I also always urge people to document these relationship situations in advance, and to take the step of talking to a teacher, counsellor, or third party about them. In our family’s case, my children had always been private about their estrangement from their father. When my son applied to colleges, we were asked for third party letters vouching for the sitation and could not provide them because of how private my children had been about the situation. Thankfully, we found many financial aid offices to be very flexible about it.</p>

<p>I think it really doesn’t hurt to try a waiver form. The NCP PROFILE is in place to prevent people from divorcing to get a better financial aid package - and unfortunately, I feel like this would happen. I think it is really unfair to students like rockermc and even students like me (my biological father was basically a sperm donor), but I understand why the program is in place. I don’t think colleges like Yale or other NCP PROFILE schools are really trying to penalize students - they’re just trying to protect themselves.</p>

<p>Yeah, I was discussing this with my mom and we just couldn’t rationalize that there wouldn’t be any leeway with this type of thing. Not all cases are identical, and colleges have to realize that.</p>

<p>One (hopefully final) question: are there any restrictions when it comes to choosing a “third party?” Because my mom and I have a family friend who has been there for us through much of the problems we’ve had, and she knows everything about our situation and would be the perfect person to write a letter, if necessary. Would she be an okay person to choose?</p>

<p>Again, it might be a good idea to ask the school you’re requesting a waiver from if she’d be an appropriate person. My son’s friend had someone just like your family friend write a letter for him and it worked out fine.</p>

<p>I’ve read on various college websites that they like to see a counselor or clergymember or that sort of thing, but I would definitely ask about the family friend. I agree that many times they are the perfect person.</p>