I don’t think I necessarily feel sorry for anyone attending an elite (and probably very expensive) prep school. Surely their highly successful (and more than likely well educated) parents can navigate the college admissions process if I can do it, being a lowly state school graduate in one of the statistically least educated states. We (my daughter and I) did pretty much all of her college search on our own, from the financial aid possibilities, to what majors were considered their ‘specialty’,to housing and campus life, to extra curricular and study abroad. Our super sweet GC (at our small town public high school) wasn’t even familiar with some of the reach/selective schools my D18 (and her friends) were considering except by reputation. But she did write a great recommendation letter! I now have several local parents who based on our successful college search process, private message me and ask for help or suggestions. I’m by no means a professional but I do know how to google and was thankful for College Confidential and other forums to fill in some blanks. The information is out there… and it’s not that hard to decipher! Those private school students will be just fine.
They also have access to all the private counselors in the area, and the means to pay for them. The kids are just fine.
Yes but the ones on FA aren’t spending $200k+on their kids k-12 education. For example, Sidwell Friends’ tuition is currently $42,327 and 23% of their students receive FA which means over 3/4 of the students are full pay. Assuming the student begins in pre-k thru 12th that’s approx $550,000; an investment by the parents not just in an excellent education but in the outcome. Even if it is high school only it’s still almost $170,000. Yes, for some people that’s pocket change and perhaps in DC the public schools are not a possibility but there are plenty of private schools that exist along side excellent public school systems and they are selling more than just an excellent education.
I’m not assuming…I know plenty of people who chose to send their kids to private or boarding schools with the expectation that it would significantly increase their chances of admission to an elite college/university.
I agree that not all parents at private schools act like the ones portrayed in the article nor am I excusing their behavior in any way. My point is that many but obviously not all, parents who “ purchase” private school are doing so because they expect a return on their investment in the form of admission to T20 school. Should they expect it is a different question. And under no circumstances should they treat the CCs or other students as discussed in the article.
And the point of my first post was not to defend poorly behaved parents but to wonder if private schools enrollment might hit some headwinds if admissions results don’t meet consumer expectation.
I’m not for or against private schools.
I am not sure why admissions results for those private schools would change. They publicize their results on their website every year, is there any reason why the results would dip?
I can tell you what I wanted for my oldest. I wanted him to be at a place where he wasn’t always the smartest kid in the room. Where he’d be challenged and have to work hard for the first time in his life. Since he turned down a college that is generally rate one or two for one that is rated in the 20s I don’t consider myself obsessed by prestige, but I do believe prestige has its place. I’ve gotten at least two jobs solely based on the name recognition of my undergrad college.
And the DC schools are notoriously terrible. Everyone I knew in public junior high went to private schools or their parents moved to the suburbs. I don’t think much as changed in the intervening years sadly. It’s not a bout the prestige of the prep schools - it’s getting a decent education.
Parents looking for a guarantee to a super-selective private college are being unrealistic; their kids still need to earn some achievement to be admissible.
However, what they are buying are enhanced opportunities, reduction of limitations, guidance toward the goal, and connections for their kids. With more opportunities, fewer limitations, and guidance toward the goal, earning the needed achievement is more likely than in an ordinary high school environment. The counseling staff may have privileged connections to super-selective private colleges. Counselors and teachers will be well practiced at writing the kind of recommendations that will be most helpful to their students, and they may be more knowledgeable about helping students write good college essays. Connections to other students who are scions of VIPs and the wealthy may also be seen as future value that is greater than connections to the 77% free-or-reduced-price-lunch students in DC public schools.
Just some of the reasons we sent our kids to private high school:
To continue and nuture their love of learning which the public school environment wasn’t focused on for a variety of reasons
No teaching to the test, no busy work, no gpas and class ranks, no APs but a rigorous preparation including extensive writing on a weekly basis
Smaller classes, more personalization, and discussion based learning. No class was bigger than 13 students, some were as small as 5 or 6. Teachers were very accessible outside the classroom.
More diversity of all kinds than what is found at our local public
Being in a place where it was okay to be smart and even cool
Superior instruction and opportunities in the fine and performing arts
Amazing, world class speakers coming to campus
Broader offerings in general - academic and extra-curricular
@ucbalumnus absolutely but is that worth the price tag? For some yes, for some no. There are many kids from top public high schools who go to top colleges and it costs a fraction of a private school education. And as we know, not all parents are realistic, rational or reasonable. The cheating scandal showed us that in prime time.
And when I asked if parents will continue to pay for private school it was in the context of parents who want to use it as a path to an elite school. Clearly there are a myriad of additional reasons parents choose private school…@doschicos just provided an insightful list.
Yes, there is no reason to believe those private school will not continue to send higher % students to top colleges. There are many families who can afford those tuitions, proven by those schools’ long WL and applicants.
Not all private schools are the same. There were private schools around my area that provided more nurturing environment for students with LD, and there were schools for wealthy families where they provided certain flexibilities, and there were schools that were more focused on academic. Both of my kids believed the education they received were better than their college. I for one do think K-12 education lays the foundation and probably more important than college.
Some of those listed in reply #46 are basically purchasing additional opportunities and removing barriers using parental money. Such added opportunities and removal of barriers can be helpful in trying for an elite college, even if there are no guarantees and the student still has to earn some achievement (which is not has hard when opportunities abound and barriers are fewer).
You’re mistaken, @ucbalumnus, and you don’t understand the motivating force behind why parents like myself choose private school options for our children. It wasn’t about “removing barriers” “in trying for an elite college”. One, my kids didn’t pursue Ivies although they did pursue and attend selective LACs, although passing on some higher ranked acceptances to choose schools based on fit. Choosing the secondary school path we did was about a better, different and, yes I’ll say it, superior learning environment for those 4 years not a college end game. Don’t mistake my list for removal of barriers (not sure what barriers you are talking about exactly anyway). It wasn’t a cakewalk by any means. As previously indicated by another poster, these students would go to selective colleges whether or not they chose to go to private or public. The secondary school my kids attended was every bit as selective as the majority of elite colleges. My kids would honestly have done well in the college game either way - public or private - as would most of their peers.
The students that are most helped are those who are on FA, especially full FA. Higher SES families have the resources to give their kids EC and other opportunities no matter where their children go to high school. Plenty of evidence of that.
Rather than stereotyping and judgement, listen to the voices of folks here who actually have first hand experience.
Please let’s not start debating the merits/negatives of private vs. public schools. It’s been discussed already ad nauseum on CC. And it never leads anyone to change their already made-up mind. And FWIW, I’ve done both. And neither was perfect.
** MODERATOR’S NOTE:**
Agreed.That is not the purpose of this thread.
Yes, parents will continue to pay for exclusive private schools the same way they pay for country clubs, fancy cars/watches, or other items of luxury, regardless of the practical value or return on investment of such an item. The item must have sufficient subjective worth in the eye of the customer to warrant the purchase; many customers think it does.
I work at a private school that my D attended and my S currently attends (he’s graduating next weekend). The school is in an affluent area and has lots of wealthy families. At the same time you have a good chunk of kids on financial aid. The school also has a scholarship program where they choose low income high achieving students to attend our school for high school. I also know middle class families where both parents work and they live in smaller house and drive older cars so they can pay the tuition for their kids to attend. Not everyone who attends a private school is wealthy.
@Leigh22 You do realize that in some areas the neighborhood public is about as elite as a private school. If you go to Laguna Beach or Newport Beach, just look at the parking lots at those high schools. They’re full of BMW’s, Audis, Mercedes, etc. These schools are full of parents who want their kids to get into USC, etc…
Also, did anyone read the book “The Overachievers?” That public school, which was in the Washington DC area, was very cut-throat and competitive. Students and parents at that school seemed obsessed with the Ivy League and taking a ton of APs.
I have worked at the same school since the mid 90’s. If my kids took the test to get in and were accepted we would get a discount on tuition. Our kids got in and we got and are still getting with S, a good discount on tuition. One reason I like our private school, my kids have had no classes with more then 25 kids. Our public schools have classes with 40 or more kids. Our school emphasizes community service and giving back to your community. Good values such as honesty, integrity, and doing the right thing are emphasized. Our school is Episcopal, but religion or lack thereof is not a factor in admissions and they encourage learning about other religions and cultures. I like that my children are challenged and have to work hard to earn their grades.
Our school has had some problems with obnoxious, entitled parents. Our administrators deal with them beautifully. Our vice principal says “Our school does not get kids into Harvard, the kid has to work hard and get into Harvard themselves.” also, “We only make special allowances in the events of illness or tragedy. Not because you think your kid is a genius or didn’t get into Yale.”
It’s too bad this happened at Sidwell…some parents can be so annoying! My H’s sister’s husband was a principal…he had great parent stories!
Out of respect for @skieurope 's request, I’ll hold my comments about the actual school itself, as difficult as it is, and just say…
It’s kind of ironic the school has the word “friends” in its name, isn’t it? Seems like they need to mail some parents a copy of the school handbook and mission statement.
I hope they gave those poor counselors hazard pay and maybe a coupon for a spa trip or something, yikes. I heard about an incident where a bus driver was badly attacked at a bus stop by parents, all over some minor incident involving their children. What’s wrong with people??
“In most jurisdictions, recording a conversation without the consent of all parties to the conversation is illegal.”
38 states, including Virginia, plus D.C., are single-party consent jurisdictions. Federal law is also single-party (18 U.S.C. § 2511).
http://www.dmlp.org/legal-guide/recording-phone-calls-and-conversations
As a public school parent, I can honestly attest that entitlement does not end at a prestigious private school gate. Yes, our public school is fabulous and we have many kids who go to elite colleges. We also have kids who will probably make the 6 o’clock news for nefarious reasons. And, yet, we have parents who act just like the “parents gone wild” at Sidwell.