Parents of the high school class of 09

<p>I am another wordsmith whose children either "hate to write" or "resist all help" so I am both relieved and anxious reading this thread. Neither of mine have wanted to look ahead on the college path at all (and I find it endlessly fascinating). Daughter will be a senior and would definitely benefit from getting essays out of the way this summer but it will not happen. I am saved from fretting too much over this right now as she is in rural Guatemala and cannot (Nor do I think she should be doing it there since the whole point is to be doing something entirely new, not "schoolwork"). I console myself that maybe her experiences will be good for writing about when she does get down to the finish line. But I am dreading the fall application overload condition, especially since she was in a non-traditional junior year program and will be adjusting to the lockstep, pressure cooker of regular school routines and AP as it is..Guess I will pray for an English instructor who will finally teach her what a run on sentence is and how to fix them. She has actually had some good writing instruction over the years in terms of voice and imagination, but grammar and spelling and syntax.....still feeble.</p>

<p>Ignatius -
I can definitely relate to your child's wisdom tooth experience. Our son went through that 2 summers ago and it did not go well as he developed a bad infection, but surprisingly it was that experience that he chose to write about for his college app. essay! He tied it in to the struggle to be self sufficient and independent while realizing that he still needed and appreciated mom. Recuperating was a time of reflection for him and the end result was very good. Hopefully the same can happen for your child. Good luck.</p>

<p>^^^ Thanks kbmom :)</p>

<p>Have calmed myself after a panic attack from reading all everyone's really good posts. </p>

<p>D is finished with all the stardardized testing - SAT, SAT IIs. She has a fair idea of academic interest and college environment she wants.</p>

<p><em>Hoping she never reads this post as I don't want to influence her decision, but I do think she discovered the school of her heart two years ago when her brother looked at it. She has now been back twice and has already listed it with NM as one of her two top options. Not really a "reach" school for her in terms of admittance - only a question of merit aid. Her second choice is a reach school, but as it is a second choice anyway, the pressure is lessened. She will apply to a total of about 8 schools - with a couple more being "reach" schools - but I think she considers herself happily "done". (Now to watch the process play itself out over the course of senior year, but I do think that it won't involve much angst.)</em></p>

<p>ignatius take heart! I have a DD who refuses to write/think/act on anything college related...except the visits...so you are not alone. She is a soccer player and fall will be hectic as it is but I won't fight with her about college stuff this summer eventhough she and I both know that it is the right time for her to be getting things done.</p>

<p>In order to preserve our relationships this summer, I told both of my girls that I would not offer unsolicited advice or nag them about any of it. If I talk college with them it has to be on their terms, not mine so we will see what happens. They know I can be hugely helpful and I will be but only if asked. So far the tension level has decreased and one of the girls has signed up for a Common Ap. account and scheduled and performed well in an interview. All on her own. My other D will do fine too. She is a safety/match for four of her favorites. I think that as soon as she realizes that I am serious about not meddling she will take a more active roll.</p>

<p>D has 2 favorite schools, one on each coast. Each has an admitted students day, probably in April. I would love for her to attend (should she be lucky enough to be accepted) to make sure that the school is a good fit before we spend so much, and she travels so far!</p>

<p>With the rising costs of flights these days, flying for a one day visit would probably only be possible if we could make the reservation far in advance. So, I'm wondering when we might reasonably be hearing back re: admission.</p>

<p>One school has rolling admissions and one doesn't. Do we have a chance of hearing early enough to afford the April flight?</p>

<p>We got our notifications sprinkled from end of January through mid-March. None of the schools had rolling admissions. I think March 31/April 1 is the golden date you hear for all decisions being mailed, but most schools do it earlier, particularly if they want you. I bet it'll be early enough to get cheap flights.</p>

<p>Son was all set to apply to a rolling decision college, then hopefully be done with everything in October. College road trip changed that! He's now got 4 or 5 good choices, and understands what his options are. It's going to be harder, but I think he'll be able to make a more informed decision when the time comes.</p>

<p>And one more thing. (Well, two, actually.) While I'm a bit more of a tech-head, I am considered a pretty good writer. I <em>knew</em> I could edit my son's draft essay into something wonderful. And so I did. But it didn't sound like him. It sounded like me. He got a little frustrated, started from scratch with a new topic, and <em>all</em> I did was correct spelling/grammar. He got several e-mails/notes from admissions officers about how much they'd enjoyed his essay. Lesson learned.</p>

<p>And again, I'd encourage you not to press your rising senior too much about getting the applications done at this point if he is not so inclined. (Summer? You guys are nuts!) This is a stressful enough time as it is. There are those kids who are eager to attack this and wrap it up early, and bully for them. But for the other 98% of the population, really there is only the one deadline (Jan 1, Jan 15, whatever). I think what you're seeking is parental peace of mind, and believe me I understand that, but patience is not a bad thing. It <em>will</em> all get done, and there is no benefit in having it done six months early if it makes you and/or your kid nuts in the process.</p>

<p>Amen to that^^^^^</p>

<p>Anyone else have a kid clearly exhibiting the push/pull of "I don't want to stay here but I don't want to leave" this early? My reluctant D described above is very much in the throes of that. It explains her avoidance tactics and desire to not think about starting apps yet. I respect it and seriously doubt that it will keep her from applying to and getting in to schools...on her own timeline.</p>

<p>For some of the rolling admit schools, the application really should be in by August or September, not January. Failure to get those in as early as possible can cause a safety to morph into a match or worse category. We don't have the kind of kid who can afford that slippage. </p>

<p>We have an agreement where college gets discussed at a set time for 30 minutes once per week. He is of course free to chat about college all he wants any time, but I can't bring it up. I "own" the 30 minutes, meaning he must come ready to work at whatever task I set out. This time is not about covering everything that needs to be covered--he is still ultimately responsible for that--but I get to address whatever has been stressing ME most. To date, that has involved vocabulary review, scheduling trip visits, and now getting started on the essay. S2 likes this structure because he makes steady progress, but isn't overwhelmed or nagged. I have also been flexible about moving the time if he really isn't up for it on a given day. He now asks in advance about what we will be covering and seems to look forward to it. I give him a chance at the end of each session to ask any questions of me and have an open dialogue. He comes prepared and knows he has my full attention as well as my having his.</p>

<p>When he found his task this week was to get started on the essay, he was happy to get started but commented that there was no way he could finish his essay in only 30 minutes. I agreed and said all I wanted was for him to work on it for 30 minutes. Whether he finished the rest on his own time over the course of the next few weeks or we used lots and lots of "my" 30 minutes up in the essay process was really up to him. </p>

<p>I don't think he is under any stress right now, but once football and school start, time will be at an extreme premium.</p>

<p>That is a great idea^^^ I do agree that the rolling admissions apps need to be done ASAP. What I believe will happen is that my reluctant D will see her sister getting responses and it will fuel her desire to get started. I will broach the 30 min a week idea with both girls to see how receptive they are.</p>

<p>My daughter's school won't send transcripts out till October. That's kind of a major part of the app for any college worth attending...so she really can't have anything complete till then. It's because otherwise kids could have seven AP courses on their transcript when school begins and drop them all by October.</p>

<p>^^^ That wouldn't work with at least one of the school's my D's applying to, as the application became available 7/1, and your housing is tied to when you get your application in. Therefore, she's trying to make sure everything's completed by end of July for that school.</p>

<p>zebes</p>

<p>My D, the only child, is also in the class of 09. Has chosen to go to Abilene Christian University. We all really liked the strong Christian base. She plans to major in Business.</p>

<p>welcome Cathy...both my DDs are considering applying to Trinity U and looked on-line at McMurray. Are you a Texan? We aren't but San Antonio seems like a great city. Good Luck to your D</p>

<p>My D and I visited Trinity U last month and were favorably impressed. San Antonio is a very cool (except weatherwise) place to be I think. We also liked Southwestern outside of Austin.</p>

<p>We live in Texas and D has the idea that staying in state would be best for her. We're eager for her to at least look elsewhere before making such a big decision based on only having looked at in state schools. It's a big country and there are great schools in other places -- but she's 17 and knows everything. Sigh!</p>

<p>She might be surprised. Son absolutely loved a school 1/2 hour from us, but after visiting a school 7 hours away, he fell in love w/that even more.</p>

<p>Good luck!</p>

<p>bblfraser: "My D and I visited Trinity U last month and were favorably impressed. San Antonio is a very cool (except weatherwise) place to be I think."
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Visited Trinity U in SA last month also. Did you happen to go to Trinity in Focus?</p>

<p>bbfraser and ignatius:</p>

<p>Will you please please please post your visit reports re Trinity U. Do I sound desparate?? ;) It's just that we won't be visiting there until after the whole Early Action admissions season reveals results and we are trying to gather as much info as possible. On paper it seems mega cool...except for the weather but hey we get temps in the 100shere. It's why God invented air-conditioning.</p>

<p>Actually I know I am not the only one who would appreciate all of you summer visitors posting your reports. It's easy to do the link is on the left side of the page towards the top.</p>

<p>^^^</p>

<p>historymom, I certainly don't mind filling out a visit report for Trinity U, but I can't quite figure out how to go about doing it. Any words of wisdom? (Are either/both of your daughters applying Early Action somewhere?)</p>