QOTD–we’ll do a grad party after the fact like we did for S15. If it’s like his, it will be in our yard (huge yard) and we’ll rent a tent. Not sure what S17 wants, but for S15, we ordered a cake, pizza and wings, and did the rest ourselves. We had volleyball, bocci, and croquet with family and friends (~35 people). It was fun for adults & kids. We also happened to have it on his 18th birthday, so it was a combined birthday/grad party in August. But S17 will be moving into a dorm in either Albany or East Lansing on his 18th bday, so the party will be earlier…
For a grad gift, we’ll probably get him a laptop–he already has a nice desktop, but has the school issued Chromebook that will be returned at the end of the school year.
We got the email from Miami (OH) today reminding us that their deadline is Feb. 1. S is not impressed, he’s SO done–not even thrilled about scholarships, honors, and 3+3 law school apps that are due in Feb…
Prom… He didn’t go last year. I’m the one bugging him to go this year, just for the experience and the photo ops. I Probably wouldn’t be thrilled with an overnight, but I know he doesn’t drink (sensory issues, so he doesn’t do anything carbonated, fruit flavored, and/or “spicy”)
Grad gift - I’m not getting one. I got her a laptop for Christmas for college and that was enough. I did pick up a necklace I think she will like and will save it for then.
@MSU88CHEng D also turns 18 at the end of August when I’m sure we’ll be ‘checking in’ to whatever college she ends up at! That’s a thought though, I could combine the grad/18 party if I did it mid-summer or something. I have to think about that.
Our prom isn’t until June so I am really not thinking about it an iota right now. I have to survive the next 2 weeks with S first (finals, a fair amount of activism stuff and scholarships/audition stuff).
Grad party, yes, at our house. Likely the weekend after graduation. As for a gift, UGH. I don’t know. He is getting a pretty big grad trip and I’d prefer that was the gift. However I made the mistake of telling him many moons ago he could have a certain brand of watch as his grad present and he remembers. I’d prefer to save that gift for college!
Prom Thursday before Memorial Day here. Our house is the gathering place, so I’ve already told D she can have the after prom party here. I like knowing where all of the kids are at. And drinking isn’t an issue with this group, but I’ll still keep an eye out on all of them.
Grad party We will have D’s party one week after graduation on a Sunday afternoon. Just having it at our house & we’ll do a mix of purchased food along with some homemade. I’m not sure if we’re going to do a tent yet - I have to see if I can just borrow one from my job. I’m already borrowing the sno-cone machine for it. We didn’t do a party for S15 - he had no desire to have one & he worked at a summer camp, so he left 3 days after graduation & returned one week before college, so there wasn’t time to fit a party in anyway.
QOTD D doesn’t want a party but I may still try to convince her to have something. Why not?! I’ll get her a new laptop for grad gift along with a Tiffany bracelet like I did for D16 last year.
prom D will go either with a date that is just a friend or with a big group. There are usually after parties that I will allow her to go to. She has been going to parties for 6 months now (not many, just like homecoming and New Years and a couple of birthdays) so she knows her limitations now as she has made some choice in the past that made her feel lousy the next day. I am of the camp that I would rather her try it now with me nearby than at college with no one she can trust. It worked very well with D16 as she is a freshman in college now and she is dumbfounded at how many kids are out of control now that they are out from their parents watchful eyes.
Grad party - Yes. If he wants it. We did our for D15 at our house and we’d Di one for S17. It was fun. We got fajitas from a caterer, so I didn’t have to cook.
Here’s a question for everyone! DD17 all of a sudden has a flurry of alumni interviews. Last Wednesday she had one with a Wellesley alumna at a coffee shop, which was planned via email. The only contact information DD had was the email address. After the interview DD wrote a thank you email rather than a note.
Should DD ask for a business card or an address to write a note? Do you ask admissions for an address or is an email fine? I’m just old enough that sending an email seems a bit informal.
She has two more this week and then two more next week.
I believe D is well and done with applying now. Eleven apps and six honors program apps. She may look at a few small outside scholarships, but I’m not going to pressure her since chances seem low and from what I’ve heard, many colleges just subtract that from their own offer.
Grad party
Oldest D had a grad party that went over very well. We rented the upper floor of our neighborhood’s volunteer fire station which was pretty cheap. It was a combined party for three - D, her BF (now fiancee) and a close friend (future best man). I would never have wanted to do such a thing on my own, but with two other Moms it wasn’t too bad. We had a grill out on the deck with hot dogs, hamburgers, and veggie burgers. Vegetable and fruit plates; chips and soda. A nice big cake of course. All from CostCo. Even the set-up and clean-up were not too bad between us Moms and a few other family members.
I haven’t asked D17 yet exactly what she’ll want, but most likely it will just be a meal out with out-of-town family and perhaps two of her friends.
Grad gift
It won’t be a laptop because she’ll be required to have one that runs all the intense math and engineering software. So I consider that a school cost. She also has her birthday in April. And she is our kid who asks for so little. Every Christmas I have to figure out what to leave out from the other kids’ lists, but I have to ask D17 “Isn’t there anything else you want?” And then come up with a surprise as well. At the least she’ll get Pandora (or Pandora knock-off) charms for her bracelet. She could use a new phone, though she has never mentioned wanting one. I’m going to need to think of something really cool.
Laughing about the orange comments. So true! My Ds are/were cross country and track athletes, so the school color is a much bigger deal for them as they’d be wearing either an orange uniform or orangey practice clothes and sweats constantly. Ick. Also, for an athlete who generates a lot of dirty clothes, the school color can be a laundry issue. D2 is going to a school whose colors are red and white–just her older sister’s school. Nice look, but not as easy for laundry as blues or greens. Just the other day I called D2 in to see the way a red item was bleeding dye as I hand washed it, and reminded her she must separate out her reds when doing laundry, at least at first.
Grad Party:
DS17 has this “Band of Brothers” thing going on with his Cross-Country team, they likely will have one large party at one of the parent’s houses (40+ kids), a few days after graduation. The core group will be the men’s and women’s (“Band of Sisters”!) X-country teams, and Cambridge AICE students (think IB).
We’ll (just the family) take him out, after graduation, for dinner.
After Prom, they likely will all go out and eat somewhere (a smaller group of 10 to 12), and then call it a night. DS is 17, and the GF is 16, so he’ll need to get her back at a reasonable time.
Grad Gift:
Not sure. For DD14, we got her a set of diamond earrings. With DS17, we may get him a new high end laptop with docking station/large monitor/keyboard, or something else?
That means it’s up to H to plan it, so I have no idea what it will be. I also don’t have the mental energy right now to devote to planning one, and luckily D17 is low key about stuff like that, so whatever H plans should be fine.
I don’t know about a gift yet-it depends on where she goes and what she needs.
College laundry-D tends to pick clothing that is dark, but not reds, mostly so it’s easy for her to do laundry (she and D18 already do their own laundry). D18 has a lot of brightly colored clothing so she sorts more and uses color trapper sheets religiously. None of us wear the color red a lot since it’s such a bear to wash.
@VBhitter21, did your D also apply to Uconn? Isn’t it big, with sports? Maybe it would be a good “extra close” option?
As far as decisions, my D knew which school she wanted (because of the specific program there, and because it wasn’t too far from home), so after it became clear we could afford it, there was never any question.
Even if they go on accepted student/visits/overnights they might still not know how it is going to be when they are actually starting college there.
@Momofsenior2017, please verify this, but from my understanding the grandparent owned 529 does not have to be listed in FAFSA as parent or student asset, but if the grandparents later contribute to college costs from that account, then it gets reported on that student’s FAFSA under “money paid by others on student’s behalf”.
Grad party: right after graduation we went out to eat with extended family. Then in August we had a cookout for some of her friends and family.
Grad gift: she had already gotten a surface and stuff for college, we also helped pay for the trip to visit her aunt
@nw2this, we have 3 kids. We are willing to help them as much as we can with undergrad, but for grad school they would have to take out loans on their own. We might be able to help with some living costs but we cannot pay for it all.
QOTD: I’ve already booked a French restaurant for her graduation party. We’re doing it the weekend before. She also turns 18 at end of May so it’s a birthday party too. It’s $20/person but luckily we don’t have a huge family or a ton of close friends but still going to be pricey. We’re doing Beauty and Beast theme mixed with whatever college she chooses.
As for a gift she didn’t want a class ring so I told her I’d get her some jewelry. Most likely a necklace. My parents and I will go half on a nice laptop unless she chooses Howard where she gets one for free.
Prom: She went last year with friends and will again this year. Going dress shopping in a few weeks (ugh those dresses are expensive!). They go out after or go hang at one of her friend’s houses.
I Probably wouldn’t be thrilled with an overnight, but I know he doesn’t drink (sensory issues, so he doesn’t do anything carbonated, fruit flavored, and/or “spicy”)