My D has worn the same “little black dress” to every dressy HS dance since Freshman Homecoming. It was more than I wanted to spend on a dress, but she promised she would get good use out of it, and she has. She did get a new dress for senior prom. It was $70 on Amazon, and it’s beautiful. 
@letsshare --thanks, yes, I think we considered about everything at some point or other. The schools I mentioned are the ones that appear to be on the short list. When I say the whole college experience, don’t mean a sports-focused school, but rather lots of majors, a “campus” feel.
@Ynotgo While at it, SULI is another great program at the national labs funded by Department of Energy.
Orientation costs: Orientation at the university where I work costs extra; it’s actually a problem, because most students don’t do it, but we have so many underprepared students that it’d be helpful in terms of adjustment and persistence, I really do think. Shifting to D17, I’m pretty sure Muhlenberg’s orientation doesn’t cost extra, but they do have a few small (i.e., capped at 15 to 25 students each) themed “pre-orientation” programs that cost—but you get early access to the dorms and they include food and such, so it actually makes sense. (One of them is a “get to know Allentown” sort of thing, which I’ve been suggesting to my daughter she should apply for, just so she knows what’s around her.)
June orientations advising sessions: Muhlenberg has these, though for students who can’t make it they’re willing to do advising by Skype or phone. D17 said today, to our surprise, that she’d like to go if it’s at all doable, and after the amount of work travel my wife and I have done this past year, we’re awash enough in frequent flyer miles that we figure we might as well send her, since it’d be at little extra cost.
Prom: D17 and D19 have both decided they’re not going to prom this year, the former because she. is. just. done. with high school, the latter because she’s gotten annoyed enough at coupled friends’ sappiness that she’s decided that the entire concept of dating in high school is an inevitable road to lunacy. :))
Graduation cap and gown: D17 brought her cap and gown home to iron the creases out of this past week. At her school everyone gets to choose their own color (and some even decorate them with fabric paint or appliques or whatever, though those designs are subject to school approval), and she went with pale blue.
@Hankster1361 not to betray my own state, and I know your S has an amazing offer from WSU but…I confess I’d put it at the bottom of your list of fine options, though it is still solid for engineering. Not sure how the rest compare financially at this point.
@LoveTheBard -We will be in Palo Alto on Friday through Monday.
@nw2this - I will post a trip report after but I am biased so not sure how worthwhile it is.
@eandesmom Congratulations on UVM!!
@itsgettingreal17 Congratulations on having a new Dawg in the house!!
@socalmom007 - Good luck on Cal Poly. The kids reaction sounds promising.
Haven’t been here for a while but sending heartfelt CONGRATULATIONS to everyone with good news. I have a bit of my own to share as my D received the full tuition Rodriguez scholarship at WashU She absolutely loved the campus and the " weirdly nice people" and sees herself being very happy there.
She is taking this week to really think about her options but I have a feeling we will be heading to St. Louis
On getting funding for grad school. Others have already pointed out the difference between “Profession” (law, med, etc.) and grad school, when it comes to seeking funding. Another recent trend (especially in engineering) are “combined degree” programs. These will allow you to graduate with both a B.S. and a M.S. or M.E. degree after only 1 additional year.
Typically, the BS/MS in program requirements are the same as the individual B.S. and M.S. (or M.E.) programs. However, several courses may be treated as overlapping. That is, graduate courses can be used as substitutes in the undergraduate curriculum. The details vary by school, but you often still have to take the GRE and apply to grad school, as normal (letters of recs, etc.). These type of programs really feel more “professional”. While these aren’t funded, they often still allow you to use some scholarship $$, if available.
DD14 (who just finished her junior year at UF) has been toying with the idea, UF industrial engineering program has 4 different combine degree programs, BS/MS in ISE, BS/MS in Management, BS/MSF in Finance, and a BS/MS-ISOM (Info systems), but now that she’s gotten her first paying internships, she’s done with school and wants to finish up her BS and go work.
If DS17 stays with aerospace engineering, I hope he gives the BS/MS program consideration, as I think doing undergraduate research and having the MS degree is of greater value in Aero, than industrial. He should, of course, also consider (funded) grad school. It’s hard to predict his interest, while still in high school.
I went back into lurker mode after D17 had a ED acceptance to WashU. I enjoyed reading all of your kids’ accomplishments between Dec and now but didn’t have much to contribute.
Discussion about Prom brings me back on board–feeling a little better about D17’s $250 dress but shouldn’t have added up the hair, nails, alterations, make-up, shoes, florist, and dinner (that we decided to ‘treat’). It was worth it; they had a great time and I got some wonderful pictures.
I keep telling myself these bolus infusions of cash will end after HS but who am I kidding? First stop, orientation: $310 + $65 for extra overnight + $350 for airfare.
@Cubanmom3 - Congratulations on the Anika Rodriguez at WashU! I hope she ends up attending.
@NerdMom88 Yes, you are definitely ahead of the game!!! @mamaedefamilia and @Mommertons How lucky for you! We tried the thrift shop route with no luck.
@MSHopeful “I don’t even want to add up what I’ve spend on prom!! Dress, limo, hair, nails, accessories, dinner…ugh.” DITTO minus the limo but several proms! @michiganbuckeye and she wore my heels!!
Similar to @socalmom007 I went over budget too but figured they averaged out!
D went to two proms last year (her junior and her b/f senior) and I paid for hair and makeup both times, she always did her own nails. And the kids all just drove themselves. This year, another two proms (her friend’s junior and her own senior with her same b/f) and she is re-wearing dresses, thank goodness and doing her own hair and makeup (her idea) so I’m thankful for all of that. It’s funny, because my d always had such anxiety about dances and was stressed about going to the first two, plus she never particularly cared to dress up, so I’m glad she decided to just go to all of them and have fun with her friends. So good inner growth, right? right?? I see much less anxiety this year!
@LoveTheBard That’s great… I find myself doing the same with coworkers sometimes. I try to keep it short and sweet though.
Did the admitted students day at University of Pittsburgh yesterday. Was very impressed with the academic information. Campus is beautiful, clean, so much available for the social side of things. Had a chance to talk to a number of kids but most tied in to the day.
On the cons side, talking to 2 girls in the caf at lunch - one was very sarcastic ‘yeah we only eat like this on student days - hope you realize they are selling you stuff’ type of convo. I would have liked to see and talk to more students, her attitude just made me look closer at what I was seeing.
Different type of campus from the traditional, but impressive. D17 loved the history, architecture, arts, academics - wasn’t concerned about activities but was concerned about the social side of things.
Not sure if it swayed her from UDel but she did comment that she wished she had paid more attention to what was around the campus outside of Main Street. At the time, bf was taking up much of her attention.
We are off to Bloomington today and tour IU tomorrow.
@BlueAFMom & @Fishnlines29 Luckily, a lot of the extra prom costs are covered. The dress needs minor alterations (somehow D is shaped like a Barbie - meaning wider hips & bust, but a teeny tiny waist - you’d never know it since she likes loose clothing & definitely not from my genetics) - but a friend who is a seamstress is going to do the alterations for free. For hair, another friend is paying for it - she has no kids & wants to treat her. Dinner is included at the prom. Limo - another friend is paying for a limo for her S, and D is a part of that group of friends. Shoes - D found sparkly silver sandals that can be utilized for years to come - only $30 so definitely not too harsh a sentence for her to pay. I think my treat to her will be nails - although even that won’t be too bad as it is a family friend & they give us a discount. D could have gotten a free ticket to prom, too, but decided it wasn’t worth the drama that it would have caused.
Prom – D and BF went last year and neither are very much into their high schools, both taking classes at local CC colleges instead, so I decided to spring for an overnight trip for them instead to the beach. Costs about the same as the dress, tux rental, tickets, dinner, hair, makeup, etc.
Funny about the students commenting about the food being good because of visit days!
Our D16 & her friends were being salty about that same thing!
@dfbdfb That’s good she wants to go! i just got myself a delta amex because they were offering 60,000 miles, I think you said you have one of those, I have to figure out how to coordinate it with my regular amex. I’m hopeful to offset another flight to Paris with these miles!
@Cubanmom3 Congrats on the full tuition scholarship! And she loved it to boot! Sounds great
@Gator88NE D initially considered a BS/MS program, but has since gone in a completely different direction. I think it’s a great option.
@BlueAFMom Ha! I think that all the time, I’m just a money tree $-)
@mominthemiddle Wow, a little bait and switch in the cafe!! Crazy. Glad she’s making the tours though!
Prom: Prom at D’s school is very low key, at least for her set of friends. The gender ratio is also about 70/30 girls/boys so perhaps that contributes? She and three girlfriends will all get ready together at one girl’s house, have dinner out, and then go to the dance, probably home by midnight. As a parent, I have to say I like this approach.
Orientation: @dfbdfb and others - I read a really interesting book called How College Works, written by two sociologists who did a long-term study at Hamilton College about student satisfaction. Although their research was based in a selective LAC, they were looking for low-cost factors for student success that can be applied anywhere. First main takeaway point - the number one ingredient to student success was establishing a friend group - not a lot of friends - but 3 or 4 as an anchor. The best way to achieve this quickly was 1) orientation programs, including pre-orientation if affordable 2) traditional dorms with long hallways and communal bathrooms 3) joining a large EC where the members work together towards a common goal - sports or theater or music ensemble, for example.
The second main insight had to do with academics 1) even one or two professors that take more than a superficial interest in a student and/or transition to mentor status are enough for a student to look back on his or her experience as satisfying 2) choice of major can be incredibly idiosyncratic - a student might take a class because a nice professor encouraged him or her and voilá, a major happens 3) Entry level classes are key - if a 100 level course is poorly taught, chances are the student will never take another class in that discipline. 4) some majors are very path dependent due to prerequisites - make sure those get done in freshman year or that opportunity may be lost.
This may sound like common sense but it was really helpful to have it presented in one package with fancy statistics and engaging student testimony to back it up.
@socalmom007 Congrats on the growing interest in Cal Poly SLO @Cubanmom3 Congrats on the Rodriguez scholarship. Wash U is a great opportunity! @LoveTheBard Congrats on Wash U scholarships and the many other opportunities your daughter has - I am curious to learn what she decides. @eandesmom Congrats on U Vermont - Burlington is a great town and the students I know who have enrolled there have been very happy.
I don’t know the details about the cafeteria food, but cafeteria food is cafeteria food at every university.
My D did lowest swipes and more dining dollars. There are lots of options on campus.
In the winter, living on upper campus, it was very convenient to have a cafeteria in the dorm.
But she is happy about being able to cook now, although it takes more time and effort to shop, cook, and clean.
@socalmom007 - refresh my memory - what is BF’s instate option? Would it be like a 4 hour car ride to Cal Poly?
@itsgettingreal17 Thanks for sharing your dd’s decision. I was wondering where she would decide to go with all of her excellent options.