I am with you @homerdog and @payn4ward -DH says those things I don’t want to hear at that time
@2019hope, we use a simple formula - DD needs to spend at least 45 minutes to1 hour doing nothing academic when she goes in higher grades. If she can’t, then she needs to lighten the load- either courses or ECs. Like @dfbdfb said earlier, DH and I don’t believe in intense focus on grades. DH tells our kids to enjoy the subject and learning process than focusing on the grades. Ofcourse DD thinks he is sooo wrong. LOL
@2019hope As someone who just navigated this process with my now 2016 HS graduate, I will tell you that it will go faster than you ever imagined. Cherish every moment. While it’s important to be aware of their academic success, don’t forget the skills needed to raise them to be an awesome, happy adult, for that will get them where they need to get in life . I am very proud of my son’s academic success , but nothing compares to how proud I am that he has grown to be a thoughtful, honest, helpful, grateful and honorable young adult. There is more than one path to get there. Find yours, and don’t worry about the others . I was very lucky to receive some great advice from some great parents on the 2016 thread. I only hope to be half as helpful to some here.
@payn4ward, I have never before seen the >:) emoji used effectively. Congratulations!!
Also, like @carolinamom2boys, our 16er graduated this week. I would love to get a do-over for all those years, even though we’re happy with they way they went. They do go too fast.
DH likes to say to the kids that they will thrive wherever they go to school since they are bright and good at advocating for themselves. While I agree with this, I want to make sure that they have the grades and test scores so they give themselves lots of options. I know they are capable of it and I don’t want to hear “I should have done x” or “I wish I would have done y” when they start applying and find themselves short.
See, I figure that no matter what one does, you’re going to get shoulda-dones and wish-I’d-gaves—making any particular choice immediately means that other choices haven’t been made.
Buyer’s remorse is real, but nearly always pointless.
Son19 is preparing a speech for tomorrow to his classmates looking to become the class VP next year. His good friend is the current class Pres.
Spring sports season is behind us now. Onwards to final exams next week. Looking forward to getting this year over. Kids definitely need a rest and break from school and sports stuff.
I am with @dfbdfb, not going to college is not an option as far as I am concerned. Paying a crazy amount of money, being obsessed with certain name colleges, is also not an option as far as I am concerned. I do want my kids to have options but I also want them to be kids and have a life.
@payn4ward or just sitting on their bed doing NOTHING. I am with you on that one. Had to tell S19 he could not go on a scout backpacking trip this weekend as he still has missing French assignments. Different between obsessed and pressure for grades and just doing the work because well, it’s due! Ugh.
@RightCoaster funny you should say that. Summer running club started yesterday and will go all summer. XC coach gave the kids the fall sports packet to fill out and turn in before school ends so it’s “done”. Okay fine but you aren’t getting my $100 sports fee till fall. LOL! They handed out AP World summer HW in band today (of all places). S19 didn’t get his packet. He is thinking it is b/c he has the AP teacher for World this year and he will get it in class tomorrow. The few other kids that didn’t get it had the same scenario. I hope so. Last year my S17 didn’t get summer HW for PreCalc. They didn’t have any more of the packets, it was never online to download nad we had to scramble to photocopy it from a classmate so he could do it. It was ridiculous!
Getting some work done for AP courses during summer sounds like a good idea. Our school doesn’t give anything for summer. Ugh! I can already see D working till midnight at the minimum once the school starts…
My DS16 never had any summer homework for any of his 8 AP classes that he took, never stayed up until midnight to complete any homework , and still managed to earn 5s on every AP test except one 4 @collegeandi . Do not let this concern you all summer. Each school is different in the way that they teach their classes.
No AP’s until you are a junior at our school. Son19 is relieved. He wants to basically do nothing except be a regular teenager all summer, ride his bike around, explore, play soccer, go swimming, sleep in etc.
Our school philosophy here is do the best you can, and really try at it. Strive for very good grades, every term. Practice for standardized tests so you can do well. That way you’ll have more options at college application time. Not Ivy striving. Just don’t sell yourself short by being a teenage slacker.
@RightCoaster We have a similar school philosophy. Summer is our slacker time with the exception of scout camp and a few pet sitting jobs. My boys also were not striving for super selective schools. Our philosophy worked for DS16 , I hope that it will be just as successful for DS19.
Our school has PreAP WH in 9th and then APWH in 10th. The PreAP is taught at an AP level. The summer work last summer was almost overwhelming for it. My d already got the summer APWH work and said it looks really easy and won’t take long. I think it’s partly because they were weeding out kids last summer who really weren’t going to put time and effort into the class, and partly because she has a better idea of expectations and managing the workload.
She has to read a book for English and write 4 paragraphs, as well, which is about the same amount of work as last summer for English.
I have always had them do at least some summer weekday learning activities, since they were going into kindergarten. I don’t have tv or video game limits, so I feel it’s fair that they are also learning something educational in the summers. It helps keep them in the habit and ready for the fall too.
My kids do not stay up doing homework late. My d19 occasionally chooses to study until maybe 9:30, but generally homework is done by 7 or so. She doesn’t play sports, which makes a difference on that front.
D is involved in many activities and comes home mostly at 7:30. She takes a break of and hour and starts working on HW after that. During competition period, she preps for ECs too. Her teachers told us that formula for APs is - 2 hours of HW for each one of them.
We were told to expect 2 hours per night as well when signing up for PreAP and honors courses going into 9th. That’s not what actually ended up happening, thank goodness.
I don’t know anybody who suffered as that rule suggests. At my school, it’s closer to 1 hour for AP and 30-45 minutes for Honors (not counting studying), but most classes don’t assign that much every day, or even any day. (Looking at you, Honors English 1.)
