Lawrence and Knox are my top choices for him. It seems to be the perfect blend of getting him pointed in the right direction for a career, but also offering all the perks of a SLAC.
I asked him if he had heard of Bowdoin, Amherst, Williams, Swarthmore and he said no. So I’m not sure how he knows the schools he’s applied to are so awful if he can’t even name the most selective LACs.
Love that show!!
Remind him…he has no idea where anyone went. His Doctor. The manger of a grocery store. The accountants. Lawyers. Salespeople. Musicians whoever.
He knows the schools he knows but there’s thousands of great colleges and they all put out successes, whether it’s Stephen F Austin, Beloit, or Harvard.
Even in your immediate vicinity, he probably hasn’t a clue where all the adults went or if they even went.
In the end it will be …does he want to be successful? Not has anyone heard of the school.
I know it’s easier said then understood. But it’s the truth.
I went to a large high school in San Diego. College attendance was all over the place. Just like society at large. Same for my kids in TN. your sons sample size, due to where you live, is just too small.
Good luck to your son. Once he meets his new friends in the fall, hopefully his mindset will change.
I get someone in Arizona not knowing Vassar…I sort of get it. But in NJ/PA/DE not knowing ?? They’ve got a branding issue if true. They need more outreach.
It’s true of many fine schools though - that lack of recognition, even at a corporate level.
I bet if you asked 100 random people on the street, maybe 5 would know where Colby is or that it’s even a college. And likely not many more HR people. Even more we’ll known schools like Tufts, Rice, and WUSTL have this problem. But three hours away…that’s a bit scary for an elite institution.
@murray93 When we first met my D19 college counselor, she said “what’s your best friend’s name?” My daughter told her and she said, “I’ve never heard of her, but that doesn’t mean she’s not a great friend. Schools are like that.” That stuck with me. But that said, I believe S22 applied to a few schools that he’s not really interested in so that when people asks he can say “I applied to Colorado, Michigan, Wisconsin, and a bunch of small schools.” That way he doesn’t have to go into depth if he doesn’t want to (which is always).
It’s wonderful that your relationship is such that he was honest with you. Maybe by getting it off his chest he can move past it and begin to feel more positively about his options?
I think it’s more our hs. I remember volunteering for something early on and a dad said to me, “why does everyone go to udel?” I think It’s just a comfort level, plus a guidance department that didn’t focus much on college. Shortly after that chat, I started researching paying for college and now I’m surprised when I haven’t heard of a school!
One or two graduates from our NJ high school go to Vassar each year and coincidentally today saw a happy picture of a student who just committed ED2. So I think their branding is fine.
Tell the parents to join the fb group!
I agree - even here in TN - I was surprised by the story but @mom2cats explained further.
My daughter chose a school that no one had heard of, and that bothered her at first, that was one of the main reasons it took her longer to commit. When she told her friends where she was going one of them responded, “Why?” It takes some time to get past that, and it’s part of the prestige factor that can be so toxic in the college search. But this is really only an issue during spring of senior year, imo. After that, everyone who is going to ask where you’re going already knows and no one else cares.
(S23 mom popping in).
I get the “never heard of it” a bit in the teen brain but we as adults know that high schoolers hearing of schools is selectively regional as well.
As someone who lives closer to Lawrence, I can say it’s very well known around here. I can guarantee theres colleges in Texas that murrays son knows and thinks are super great that even our top performing kids here have never heard of.
Not sure if any of them are sporty type kids but I know there was signing day recently. Perhaps have them begin to follow the football team for Lawrence (as an example) on Twitter. There are a few recent posts about kids from out of state feeling very blessed to be chosen to attend Lawrence. Maybe that will take away the “never heard of it around here” edge.
Ooh, I like Lawrence! 3 people from my h.s. went there. 1 is a doctor now, 1 a lawyer in NYC, the 3rd is a geology professor (and a lead guitarist in a locally popular rock band.) Super fun school.
Thank you for the helpful comments everyone. I think there is some imposter syndrome going on here, too. I’m no good so if the school wants me, it must be no good as well. He has gotten personal emails from music directors and top merit awards based on his scholarship recording and his response: everybody got that.
I think looking at outcomes may be the way to convince him. I just hope he gets on board soon.
Crossing appendages for Lawrence, but I don’t think they are needed – admitted student event invites are an excellent sign!
Ooohhh @UCDProf congrats! SO excited for your deserving D and your family!! 1 down, 1 to go!
@Juno22 OK, here you go: Cozy Rural Retreat, Cat Lover’s Campus, or Historic Gem on the Prairie (shoutout to @murray93 for that one!) 
Congrats on Knox @murray93! I’m glad he finally opened up to you about his thoughts. I think it can be very difficult for teenagers to comprehend that this moment in time, when the “name” of the school, or “prestige” is so important, is fleeting. As in by next year, when he and all his friends are off at their different schools making new friends, none of this stuff matters anymore and no one even cares other than - when are you home on break? I remember in high school we were all very interested in where each other was applying and going to school. Now, I would be very hard pressed to tell you where a single person I graduated with went, nor anyone I’ve worked with for that matter. It just ceases to become an issue. But like I said, teenagers are either going to accept the knowledge or they are going to learn it on their own. 
Another book recommendation for you might be “where you go is not who you will be” which is very much about people who started at schools that “accept anyone” and went on to lead successful lives! 
Shocking!
It can be a hard sell. My D is very accepting of this reality, but we have another family member applying this cycle who is going down a different path, and this student is feeling very discouraged to “only” have acceptances to safeties so far. There’s only so much you can do. You plant the seed and hope it takes root.
I am very hopeful for LU, sounds like very positive signs, and I hope your S comes around to realizing he has some amazing opportunities available to him! 
Fabulous news!! Congrats!
Fantastic outcome. Congratulations! You guys have not been to Smith yet, right? Very exciting!
Thanks!
No, never visited anywhere except walked around Berkeley once. The best statistical shots for no loans were Smith, Grinnell and Washington & Lee, and she chose Smith for ED2. Others reading this should keep these in mind for future years.
My favorite is Agnes Scott but we couldn’t risk waiting for a full ride scholarship that probably wasn’t coming.
It’s certainly no tragedy that she’s going to one of the greatest colleges in the world!
Smith is a beautiful campus and Northampton is a great college town. Plus just over an hour to Boston, 20 minutes to UMASS and maybe 3 hours to NYC. She’s going to love it! From what I know the alumna network is also amazing