Many of the kids in our school apply to Pitt. Possibly the next closest OOS school to us. But it was the first choice of several of our top students. Some ended up not going because of the cost.
Yes itâs a lot of pressure on the kids. My DDâs teachers basically told her pls let them know if she gets into top schools (jokingly but also half truths) because they would like to take credit for it. So it can be hard on the kids.
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Totally agree! I turned down Northwestern (Medill) to go to a very small LAC in PA. Would have been same cost. But I visited Northwestern and hated it - wasnât right for me. Going to the college I wound up at changed my life - met my husband and amazing friends there. The company I worked at for 25 years came out of a local internship recommended by a prof. Everything was set into motion through going with where I felt I was being called to college.
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Haverford? I love that school!
Iâm pretty sure that a school (Pitt) with a 28-33 50% ACT range is not an âaverageâ school academically. Vandyâs is 34-35; only a person living in a bubble (or in arrogance) would think ACT<34 = âaverage academicsâ.
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There, fixed it.
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Thatâs definitely true! Or, at least in certain threads. 
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(Or in my sons case, his ACT of 35 is not âreplacingâ his gpa of 3.4)
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Nope.
Iâve been reading these threads for over a year now, and Iâve got to say (in general, not directed at you) that it gets a bit tiring to read about 35/36 ACT kids with âsafetyâ schools that are top choices for another kid, or the this or that kid is âsettingâ for a school another kid would dream to attend. There are lots of parents here, lots of kids, lots of experiences, lots of educational paths and futures. Would be good if there was more openness to that. Thatâs all.
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I completely hear you! When my S18 was choosing a school, I remember talking to one of his friendâs parents. They have 4 kids and we have 4 kids. Their third was the same age as my 1st. Anyway when I said he was down to X school and Y school, this parent said he would never send his kid to X school because itâs subpar education and such a party school⊠how many schools do not have a party segment??? Well, S18 ended up picking X and got a a full scholarship there. Other parentâs S18 went out of state to a âbetter schoolâ. That kid dropped out of school in Spring semester and then their S21 end up going to X school! Ha! That just about cracked me up! Every time I see them, I think of that!
And by the way, my D23 is very interested in Pitt and itâs one of the top possibilities on her list. Her current friend group are all the nerds in school and they are all using Pitt as their safety school. It used to terribly offend her when they would say it but now she doesnât give a hoot. She recognizes that itâs her choice and her money and they can do whatever they want. But seriously, I know hearing it is just garbage. People should watch their words.
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I saw on Tiktok that the UVA dean did announce Friday EA decisions. Good luck to all of you!
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I call that playing the long game. And yes the long game sometimes extends into adulthood. I have seen it plenty kids that are in my kidsâ circles. I have seen the superstar athlete at 10 burnout before HS. Or the ones that donât grow and just donât have the size to make it to the next level. But I have seen it in academics as well. Our K-8 district starts a gifted/honors program in 6th and it is interesting to see who can extend it into HS. Always more kids in Honors Math in 9th than there is in the AP Calc classes.
All of that is totally natural. It is bound to happen and usually there is very little the parents can influence the situation. But it is the parents that for a better word like to run their mouths. The ones saying Johnny is going to the MLB. Or Sally is getting into Yale and anything less is failure. Sadly those same parents do influence their kids. The kids see and hear the parents and the kids start to be the same way. And sure some kid makes in a sport to the next level or gets into an elite university. It does happen. I always told my kids to wish them well and worry about yourself more. The beauty of HS is if you donât want see those folks again usually you can avoid them.
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Mini-vent: Dâs spring break is the last week in March. Was hoping to spend it visiting school to which she was accepted. But after multiple deferrals and late release dates, it looks like she wonât even hear from the majority of those colleges until the end of the last week in March. Oh, and much later for the inevitable wait lists.
There are worse things.
The wait is hard.
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The valedictorian from my high school- such a smart kid but she just was driven to be top and go to the âbestâ school. She had a breakdown during her first year at Princeton- was so sad when I heard that as a college student.
Yep, exactly. We have drummed the same thing in to our kids. Play the long game. S18 is very happy to have graduated debt free and found many ways to spread his wings and soar at X school. It was a great experience. And I hope our friendâs S21 finds the same at that school.
But yes, I tell my D23 that these kids who surround her now probably wonât be in her circle in a year or two. College will be so much more freeing because you pick your crowd. You arenât stuck in the same herd. I mean she doesnât have a small school⊠about 1200 kids in the HS⊠but all of the same kids end up being in the same classes if you are taking a certain path.
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Absolutely agree that there are tone deaf folks everywhere, including on CC. I have found it interesting, though, that I feel like there is less of that sort of stance among the '23 parents as compared to the '21 crowd. Maybe itâs because so many of our kids spent most of their high school years dealing with pandemic-related hurdles, but there seems to be more discussion in this group about kids going to a wider variety of schools than I remember from 2 years ago. Or maybe we were all just stuck in the house, so people had to come here to air their unpleasant opinions instead of doing it at school events. 
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I have a kid that graduated high school in '19, he is a college senior now. I have a high school senior this year. And I feel the tone now is much more pragmatic and welcoming and inclusive.
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Yup, the wait is definitely weighing heavy at this point. D23 wished she had applied ED2.
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It is a long wait. Ours always knew the vast majority were going to be coming in the second part of March , but it is still long even when that was the plan as far back as summer. She does have a likely/safety coming Friday so that should be an official YES somewhere. She may end up regretting not doing any EDs. I agree the waitlist game may be in play for many of us on here. D21 did not have any WLs so that will be newânot sure we will avoid it this time around!
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I feel for you & everyone else in this position. S23 wanted an early answer, so he applied to an REA & 10 EA before Nov. 1st to try to move on & enjoy senior year. But the way EA decisions have trickled out⊠drip, drip, drip⊠not so much⊠it is always on his mind.
However, S23 is fortunate to have some choices. He made the difficult decision to ED2 recently (which was not in our original plan). He feels a little guilty⊠having some good acceptances already, but he didnât want to have any regrets. Many of his friends do not have any or only one acceptance.
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