Anecdotally, our hs GC told us that approximately 50% of kids who go to college oos transfer home to the state flagship within a year.
Oh wow - that sounds very high, and I’d hope that that would nudge the high school to examine why so many of their students ultimately are feeling unprepared for transitioning to college 
I would agree that there is some impetus for students who go out of state to transfer. Here in California, students often go out of state because they didn’t get into any schools here at home they were willing to attend. Our in state publics are excellent, but outlandishly competitive for admission.
“Live in New York City once but leave before it makes you hard
Live in northern California once but leave before it makes you soft”
Academically, the kids are well-prepared for college. But college life isn’t just about doing the work. Making new friends, communal living, the culture shock of moving to a new city—it can be a lot for kids who have grown up in a bubble. Even the most mature kids can struggle with the college transition.
My daughter is doing a semester in London this fall before she starts at USC in January. She moved in last week and just started her classes today. We flew into London a few days before move in day and had some fun exploring before the tearful goodbye. As I flew back without her, started to wonder if it was a mistake in letting her go so far from home. She is on the introverted side and an extremely picky eater. (With the exception of Starbucks, her diet has not evolved much since she was 5 .) She also has an aversion in trying new foods. There is no meal plan there so it will be up to her to figure it out.
It’s now been a week since move in day and I’ve had several updates on the social and food front. She’s been to Greenwich, The British Museum, the Sunday market in Notting Hill and live music at the local pubs-plural! (Drinking age is 18.) She also went out for meals a couple of times with other students. I almost fell over when she told me how much she liked the murgh makhani and the panang chicken curry.
One week in London has resulted in her embracing new experiences and foods that are way outside her comfort zone. Maybe sushi will be next?!
No more second guessing, at least for now…)
We not fans of coming home for short breaks or just weekends. DW and I even are willing to forgo a Thanksgiving if D23 wanted to wanted to go to a roommates home. We did this in college ourselves.
We think part of going to college is learning about living on your own.
I’m so sorry. I hope things look up. I’m so happy to hear your son is doing well at Syracuse.
Reporting back after a crazy summer! I hope you’re all doing great. I dropped my kid off at Loyola a few weeks ago, and he’s in his third week of classes. He’s met a ton of his people, he’s playing music all the time, and he has a great roommate. His dorm room is nicer than I expected, with exposed brick and a beautiful view of the quad. I stayed in town for a few days so I could attend convocation, which was emotional and beautiful. Writing this all down, I realize more than ever how very lucky we are and how grateful for how this journey is turning out. He’s over 2k miles away, so we won’t be able to see him until probably December (or maybe a chance at Thanksgiving), but it’s going great. (The other downside is that he’s already been exposed to Covid and had to quarantine and miss some of his first classes. That’s passed already and he’s back in class.)
Im glad his school does this is spring semester.
If it makes you feel any better, my daughter didn’t send any pics from the Dome either! Lol I did see one that her room mate sent to her mom thought so good enough. We’re going to the game this Saturday for my husband’s bday so we’re hoping to meet up with our kid for a hot minute. We’ll see!
Same. I got one through the mom of one of his new friends!
And she’s down with Covid. That didn’t take long 
Ugh. As one of my friends so eloquently put it: “the dorms are cesspools.” Wishing her a speedy recovery and hoping campus health centers administer the booster soon. 
She was sick pretty much non stop at boarding school (where she spent the last 2 years of HS), had everything but Covid there. And had a single room there and now. I hope after this she gets a break!
I hope the new dorm room works out!
The school has heavily invested in the “student experience.” The first weekend is all about welcoming them to campus. Within a few days, they’d:
We have seen them several times. They needed to pick up their new laptop one day. Another day, we already had tix to a sporting event. Later, they were forced to leave campus after getting COVID so they are home again.
They have a load of friends and feel happy on campus. I think they fully expect to see people “from home” while at college. For example, after one sporting event, we dropped them off at the pool to see a friend who is still in high school.
On Labor Day, they didn’t come home. They were taking their new friends on a tour of the city. =) They have a friend pack. The six of them spend loads of time together, and a few of them met at orientation! They also have a study group.
My job now is to send photos of the cat. Haha.
DD21 has covid and strep.
DS23 is running a fever and other covid like symptoms.
Great beginning to the school year. Lol.
LeMoyne is a great school! My son loved so much about it, but in the end felt it was a bit too small and didn’t have as much diversity as he had he hoped for. But we were very impressed-you have to go to an event with the school president (they hold receptions for admitted students on campus or in various cities) and she is SPUNKY! So much energy and positivity! Loved her!
I’m so sorry she had to deal with that 
I really don’t understand the push for such uniformity in these sorority houses in a society that usually (and rightly!) embraces diversity. I’m sure she will find her people and/or maybe even realize Greek life isn’t for her. My heart breaks for her and you as parent! Sounds like it worked out eventually, but nobody wants college to start out deflating a kid!
Dorms are cesspools for sure. My D19 spent first semester always sick. D23 ended up driving one of her roommates to the ER Friday because the student health center suggested she go there. D23 drove her there. Roommate ended up being transferred to a larger hospital about 1.5 hours away and they were testing for lyme disease. Terrible way to start college. I am glad D23 could help out and stayed until she was transferred.